Husband is being a cunt, can i ask you this?

(22 Posts)
NiaceGuidelines Sat 08-Mar-14 02:29:21

I have a 18.5 hour a week job. 10,000pa.

Childcare Costs of £400 pm

Mortgage and bills will be about £900 pm including running a car.

Am I entitled to any benefits or help after he leaves.

He earns 24000.

I'm going to do this.

NiaceGuidelines Sat 08-Mar-14 02:29:53

I have 1 child.

AdoraBell Sat 08-Mar-14 02:35:05

I don't know, but there are websites that you can use To check elegability for benefits.

Hopefully someone moré knowledable will be along soon. Sorry you're going through this. thanks

AgentZigzag Sat 08-Mar-14 02:35:59

Have you had an argument tonight, is that why he's leaving?

Are you OK?

Where is he now?

You can check what benefits you'd be entitled to at gov.uk and Directgov and an independent benefits calculator.

fuzerelli Sat 08-Mar-14 02:36:06

I don't know the answers to any of your questions, but good luck to you.

mumblechum1 Sat 08-Mar-14 02:38:12

Yes, you'll get working tax credit, child tax credit and maybe more. Put your details into the Entitled To website calculator.
He also has to pay child mtce of 15% of in for 1 child, 20% for 2 etc

2Retts Sat 08-Mar-14 02:39:01

Entitlements

Hope that helps OP

NiaceGuidelines Sat 08-Mar-14 02:46:50

http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2018598-Husband-totally-absorbed-in-work-and-a-critical-bore?

Thanks everyone. This is why ^^

AgentZigzag Sat 08-Mar-14 02:59:12

You're right, he is a cunt isn't he?

Don't let him grind you under his heel any more, you're worth more than that.

You should be with someone telling you how amazing you are and what a fantastic Mum you're being, not this arse.

I know he's got his good points, but the bad far outweigh them, you're doing the right thing smile

Is he still downstairs drinking beer? Are you just up to feed your DD or has he been having a go at you?

MsAspreyDiamonds Sat 08-Mar-14 07:36:32

www.womensaid.org.uk/

please have a chat with womans aid as they can help you with the practicalities of leaving & be a sounding board for you in rl. Once you are away from him, you might see that his behaviour was there in small doses before the baby arrived. If it is a pattern of abusive behaviour, then it will only escalate over time so you need to escape.

Interestingly, Clare's Law was passed yesterday to allow women the chance to check if a new partner has a record of violence against women. So more women should take advantage of this life saving law.

m.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-26488011

NiaceGuidelines Sat 08-Mar-14 20:08:35

MsAsprey thank you. I did have a good read of this stuff and thankfully, he has gone. For tonight at least without a fuss or drama.

Hissy Sat 08-Mar-14 20:15:07

Oh thank god he's gone!

How are you though? Use the links up thread and speak to cab too if you can.

You will be ok!

RhondaJean Sat 08-Mar-14 20:16:47

You are definitely entitled to some tax credits, and to maintenance from him, I think 15 % of his salary for one child.

Use the calculators, but you won't have to survive just on your salary. It will be topped up a bit.

CogitoErgoSometimes Sat 08-Mar-14 20:20:05

You might already have the link www.turned2us.org.uk where there is a very good benefits checker. Suggest you also get legal advice as you have a child together and also shared assets such as a property. Best of luck

NiaceGuidelines Sat 08-Mar-14 20:24:08

Thanks. I'll get onto those sites tomorrow. Hissy I'm actually feeling OK thank you. DD is in her bed, I'm in mine and I have chocolate! I feel light and sad all at the same time.

CombineBananaFister Sat 08-Mar-14 20:24:25

the websites mentioned are great and you can even input different scenarios to see what you would have to do to make it work for you - because you really sound like you need to.

You will be entitled to working tax credits and they will probably cover 80% of your child care. I would think you will get help towards your rent as well, not full housing benefit, but some help given your income.

Use the government benefit calculators and the tax credits calculator for an estimate.

NiaceGuidelines Sat 08-Mar-14 20:27:28

I (we!) Have a mortgage red. But the childcare costs will be a huge help. Red I'll do both of those tomorrow. It's horrible. I feel so sad for DD. Despite him being a cunt to me, she seems to like him. She's going to miss him.

2Retts Sat 08-Mar-14 21:32:34

Ooh, you'll also be entitled to a reduction of 25% of Council Tax and possible help from benefits for the rest also.

Sorry you're going through this Naice and I'm sure your DD will be better off with a much happier mum who doesn't have to sneak feed her.

Hope you find a way through and stay strong

hamptoncourt Sat 08-Mar-14 22:01:28

Here is a link to the tax credits calculator taxcredits.hmrc.gov.uk/Qualify/DIQHousehold.aspx and this will show you how much you will get between now and end March so divide by three to get a weekly amount.

You have 2 DC don't you? So it should be around £500 a month tax credits. Plus help with childcare costs. He will have to pay you 15% of take home pay if one DC is his, 20% if 2 or more. So assuming he takes home around £1600 he will have to pay £240 if one DC and £320 if 2 or more.

Do not leave the house, no matter what pressure he piles on. Stay as long as you can, and see a solicitor as soon as you can.

MsAspreyDiamonds Sat 08-Mar-14 22:18:24

Yes do see a solicitor asap as the first 30 mins are free so you could see several to get as much advice as possible..Also remember that once a solicitor is aware of your situation then they can't advise your husband. So it might be worth seeing several good solicitors in your local area.

www.moneysavingexpert.com/family/

www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CDMQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lawsociety.org.uk%2Ffind-a-solicitor%2F&ei=BpYbU-DQGMap7AbXuYGIBQ&usg=AFQjCNEoCujxMCx54jkdOhjDHK9gNRROfQ

LimitedEditionLady Sat 08-Mar-14 22:29:13

Try tax credits calculator,im pretty sure you will if you are living without him there.Well done for being strong and all the best

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