40+5, first baby. Yesterday the midwife booked me in for an induction at 40+13 if I go that long. I know there are good reasons to induce - risk of stillbirth goes up after 42 weeks (even if it's still tiny), I won't be sodding pregnant and sick any more - but I am feeling more and more strongly that induction is not what I want to do.
MW thinks everything looks good and there is progress, it's just not happening fast (baby still high but more engaged than last week, Bishop score of 2, sweep unsuccessful). There's a family history of 42-week pregnancies, on both mine and DH's side. I can feel my body starting to gear up for labour (spells of painful contractions that fizzle out). 40+13 is still over a week away. And then I start thinking, this time next week I'll be arriving at the antenatal ward, and the thought of it makes me want to burst into tears.
I do think IABU to some degree to be dreading induction this much, because I can't even quite put my finger on why. I'm convinced that if they induce me, I'll end up on syntocinon and continuous monitoring and then have a section anyway and the whole thing will go wrong and be awful. I know most inductions aren't horror stories, but I am convinced mine will be, and that it'll be my own fault for trying to push things before my body and my baby were ready, when maybe it's just the kind of baby that takes 42 weeks to make. Originally the midwife tried to schedule induction for 40+14, then the hospital had no slots that day so it became 40+13, and then they want you in the day before so that's 40+12, and now it feels like a ticking clock getting louder and louder and louder.
I know I can say no to induction, but then I'd be taking on extra risk and I wouldn't be super-happy with that either. I just can't stop thinking about it and dreading it. Everything about it feels wrong. I even wanted to put my hands over my ears when DH asked which building the ward was in! All this is totally unlike me and I have no idea where it's all come from. I don't ever cry, ffs, and yet I know I'm going to be turning up for that induction in tears.
So. AIBU to consider refusing/delaying induction because of this? And if I am, how the fuckity fuck do I get over it?
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AIBU?
AIBU to really, really not want an induction?
125 replies
PterodactylTeaParty · 07/03/2014 14:38
OP posts:
Chunderella ·
07/03/2014 18:45
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