BIL and his partner visiting us as BIL has work sales jolly held near us and partners invited so they are coming too and being put up in hotel with all the other top sales people on the jolly. Great, we are delighted to have chance to see them - we live in tropics , they live in UK so catch ups are rare.
Then we hear via BIL that MIL wants to come too, same dates same flight. Fine, lovely, she can catch up with Ds who she's not seen since he was a baby (he's now 3). We assume MIL also staying in hotel.
It is a known fact that we don't have spare bed or spare bedroom, just our room and DS room and kitchen/sitting room space.
So as not to drip feed, DS has SN and cannot sleep in with us, nor is there room in his bedroom for an adult to sleep.
DH and I would have to give up our bedroom and sleep on sitting room floor.
Which we can do, and will have to do, obviously but FFS, cannot believe nobody has thought to let us know MIL intends staying with us or check there is a damn bed.
Further info: MIL is lovely, super-keen granny, committed Christian, keen to help, tidy, cook, take endless pictures of DS, play and read to him and be really fully involved and then talk lots about art, literature, culture etc etc when he's in bed/n/a.
I like her loads and admire her and am a bit exhausted thinking about it it's only for a week but AIBU to be a bit freaked out about having a keen, excited granny in the house all the time and nowhere to hide or sleep? She doesn't want to avail herself of the tropical tourist stuff. She just wants to be with DS and her family. All the time she is here.
I have very little left to give after full day being SAHM to DS who has a huge schedule of early intervention therapy going on right now and by 8pm I am ready for wine and then bed, I can barely talk. I sleep very badly. I go to bed before 10pm. I need space and silence and time to exercise to cope and be a good parent to DS (and wife to DH). Otherwise I'm afraid to say I can't cope very well.
I am also unfortunately an anxious introvert who hates having house guests who want to stay in house all the time and talk and tidy and be always around.
All this and BIL and partner hanging out with us too and wanting dinner out and home cooked meals and holiday fun and nights out! DH and I are exhausted and have a night out about 6x year. We come home by 11pm.
Help me get perspective on this: am doing it for DH and his family's sake and because DS deserves to get to know his grandmother and vice versa.
But none of them have given a thought to our day to day lifestyle looking after small child with SN, single income, DH working huge hours and me SAHM.
They see the lovely location and the chance to have a super holiday and family catch up.
They didn't even check re sleeping arrangements - they just assumed.
AiBu to feel frustrated and annoyed?
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AIBU?
To wish in laws had asked about beds before arranging visit?
232 replies
TrucksAndDinosaurs · 31/01/2014 12:32
OP posts:
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