Because I really don't think I am!
To set the scene: I separated from ExH last year, all very amicable, and with DD (nearly 16) put first throughout. ExH lives nearby, and DD has her own room in his new house, with clothes, makeup, everything, basically a second home, where she's always welcome, and takes herself off there at weekends when I'm working, over for tea during the week...basically we've made it as stress free for her as it possibly can be.
DD is sitting her main GCSEs this summer, so is understandably stressed about revising and so on. However, she's being a nightmare, and is really hurting me. I've made allowances for her, but I can't cope any more.
She doesn't lift a finger around the house. If I directly ask her to do something, such as empty the dishwasher, out a load of washing on, she will eventually do it, but with incredibly bad grace - sighing, slamming of doors, pushing past me. Instead, she disappears into her room as soon as she gets in from school, allegedly to do her homework. In reality she sits watching tv on the laptop until I get screamed at at 10pm as she's just started her homework and is stuck. She'll come down for tea, chuck her dirty dishes on the side, then flounces back upstairs.
I've just done 3 12 hour shifts in a row at work, I'm a nurse so I'm physically and emotionally exhausted. My day off today has been spent cleaning, meal planning and food shopping, before another 12 hour shift tomorrow, as I've swapped a shift so I'm off for DD's birthday later this week. When she got in from school (stepping over the bags of shopping in the porch, opening her post and throwing the envelope on the side, presumably for me to out in the bin), I asked her if she minded walking the dog, just once, as my back is really hurting. Cue much flouncing, sighing, dirty looks.
I pointed out that I was tired, and am back at work tomorrow - all I get is "well I didn't ask you to go food shopping", and "if you don't care about spending my birthday with me, don't bother, I didn't ask you to change your shift" before stomping out to walk the dog with the parting shot of "hopefully you'll be less of a bitch when I get back!" She's now upstairs refusing to acknowledge my existence.
I know I shouldn't put up with this, but the truth is it hurts me so much when I get the silent treatment from her, that I'm treading on eggshells trying not to upset her. I'm sat downstairs sobbing, and am very close to picking up my car keys and just driving away.
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AIBU?
To be at the end of my tether with DD?
36 replies
TooManyButtons · 21/01/2014 19:43
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