irritated by FB statuses...

(101 Posts)
VelvetSpoon Thu 26-Dec-13 14:20:40

I absolutely know I'm being unreasonable but...

On my news feed today was:

2 pregnancy announcements
3 engagements
Far too many 'oh I'm such a lucky girl look what my boyfriend/man/hubby bought me' and accompanying photos
And loads and loads of 'what an amazing Xmas with all our family and friends'

I'm sure I should think 'oh how lovely' but having spent Xmas at home with me and DC (no other family) and not having anyone to buy me flashy presents, I'm just a bit envy I guess...

annieorangutan Thu 26-Dec-13 14:48:33

you never know you might meet the love of your life in 2014!

Who told you to?

I said if. IF!

TheBrotherHoodOfSteel Thu 26-Dec-13 14:53:53

Think yourself lucky op at least you have your kids! I would quite happily have given up all my presents just to spend the day with my children.

VelvetSpoon Thu 26-Dec-13 14:57:04

I think Xmas is a hard time for people like me without family (and it's not that I have family, and just don't speak to them - I have no-one) and FB is a sharp reminder of that.

VelvetSpoon Thu 26-Dec-13 15:00:21

I have my kids at Xmas because, tosser though he is, even my Ex isn't enough of a shit to see me sitting at home completely alone all over Xmas. I suspect if I had anyone else to be with he'd want the DC to be with him at least overnight.

YouTheCat Thu 26-Dec-13 15:01:01

Christmas is what you make it. I have 2 brothers and an elderly aunt. All of them live hundreds of miles away.

But I've had an excellent Christmas.

Bunbaker Thu 26-Dec-13 15:05:40

I know that you can always not bother looking at Facebook, which seems to be the stock answer, but I do think that Facebook brings out the worst in people who are prone to boasting.

It seems to be a great platform for people who want to swank and don't care if it upsets other people or not.

I said in another thread that doing this is insensitive and crass and I still maintain that it is.

For what it's worth we have had a lovey quiet Christmas, but I haven't posted on Facebook. But then I don't feel the need to swank on Facebook anyway.

mrsoh79 Thu 26-Dec-13 15:09:37

I know of someone who has de-activated their account due to the fact they kept airing their dirty laundry all over it, didn't help when a relative of her on/off boyfriend pulled her up on her status about lying, I'm not friends with my sil due to the fact she bitches and moans all the time alot of the time about family, I've made the decision to not be friends with her and to stay well away.

MaeveORave Thu 26-Dec-13 15:18:23

Oh other people's posts don't make me feel inadequate!

If i thought about some of the worst offenders on my list, inadequacy wouldnt b what i feel compared to them. No, stronger, saner, more secure, less materialistic, more content, more self-aware, less careless with my privacy....

No way am i talking about all my fb friends here, most are funny, self-aware, secure in themselves, not insensitive.

It is a damaged self'-esteem amd a big ego though , that posts a picture of what their hubby bought them, especially if they know it is especially generous! I mean at christmas btw. Birthdays slightly different as the day is more personal.

As for meeting true love, maybe! But would make a dick of myself telling people i was "in love" on facebook.

MaeveORave Thu 26-Dec-13 15:20:54

Oh yes, the old "dont let the badtards grind u down" statuses followed by "ill pm u" (for a bitch, about somebody who is reading this).

Honwstly some people shouldnt b let loose on fb. They just humiliate themselves!

starlight1234 Thu 26-Dec-13 15:22:30

Yes I think you are been unreasonable..I have just spent Christmas with DS and me and made it a lovely day...

I love seeing the happy messages, photos of peoples family Christmas....

There are a lot of people who presume the motives for everyone on FB... Nothing is that simplistic...The posts that drive me mad are the people that are never happy ..always moaning.....

To add FB is snippets of RL....People only let you see what they want you to see so take it with a pinch of salt

annieorangutan Thu 26-Dec-13 15:28:42

I do think op that anyone that gets irritated by things on facebook is feeling jealous or comparing themselves negatively but its not facebook or the people on its fault its stuff that you yourself can change. No better time than the new year either.

MrsDeVere Thu 26-Dec-13 15:39:00

I think MN should have a FB board where all these 'FB wah wah wah' threads could go.

I am pretty sure it would be busy given the volume of FB threads recently.

I am pretty sure I would have occasion to use it myself.
But Christmas FB threads annoy me. FB is for this purpose.

For telling people what a great time you are having, posting photographs of you having a great time and Public Displays of Affection, however sick making.

Bunbaker Thu 26-Dec-13 15:41:42

"I do think op that anyone that gets irritated by things on facebook is feeling jealous or comparing themselves negatively"

Not necessarily. I tend to agree with Maeve and think some of the worst offenders are those that do feel inadequate because they are constantly having to prove to the outside world how good a time they are having. I suspect these are the people who have hundreds of "friends"

The only FB post I posted yesterday was to wish everyone a Merry Christmas.

MaeveORave Thu 26-Dec-13 15:44:08

But annie, it's their inadequacies that make them boast.
Im not jealous. I honestly feel quite morto for people sometines, the way they carry on in fb. And NO not lweaving fb because five people out of 100 embarrass themselves with their neediness and insecurity. I dont dislike one of the women who does this, just feel a bit sorry for her that she's not more content.
Amother, she is nice in rl.
Another is a relative , cant delete.
Find the suggestion that if u observe human behaviour in fb and see thru it, u must leave!!! That is so black andwhite. U must LOVE FB and everybody on it and everything they ever post? Or u should leave???? :D
That' s funny.

VelvetSpoon Thu 26-Dec-13 15:46:32

I probably am jealous of those who have huge family Christmases. Because I don't, I can't.

Love the idea that I can somehow change this hmm.

All I can change is just not going on FB.

FloozeyLoozey Thu 26-Dec-13 15:48:23

I do know what you mean OP but that is Facebook unfortunately.

MaeveORave Thu 26-Dec-13 15:50:38

Bunbaker+1
I like those simple messages. Sending goodwill outwards, not trying to attract admiration.
I am very content with the way things have gone for me thia year but actually altho there is a part of me that wants people to know the good stuff i wouldnt give in to it without running a few questions past myself first. Over xmas lunch ystrdty i shared two pieces of good news with family & cousins etc and it will ripple outwords. People who are genuinely happy for me will say "oh , did u hear? Maeve got a new job/house/ six book deal " wink

annieorangutan Thu 26-Dec-13 15:59:39

I know op that some people find it hard not to but its the same as the op that got jealous of the present pile. Some people have some things and some do not, but there are plenty of ways to make things better for yourself next year. Spend 2014 socialising more and meeting new friends or a new partner and bring them over for Christmas.

FeckOffCupofMulledWine Thu 26-Dec-13 16:09:47

The pregnancy and engagements are fair enough, as fbook is a nice way to share news like that, but I wouldn't be posting pics of presents - definitely smacks of showing off

Agree with this, I love to see people's good news but pics of showing off make me hmm, I'm not interested in your new handbag/jewellery/flowers (and no I'm not jealous, DH got me lovely thoughtful gifts).

Shockers Thu 26-Dec-13 16:16:48

I love seeing photos of my friends and family posing for their Christmas photos! I think my friends and family must have secret discount accounts at the White Company, there were some stunningly beautiful tables going on.

I didn't post any of my Christmas table, due to the complete lack of opulence in decoration... food was great though.

I posted pics of our family hiking up a hill on Christmas morning, and I shall enjoy looking at them all year smile.

MrsDeVere Thu 26-Dec-13 16:20:44

shockers there will be people who think you are showing off about having a family who get to walk up hills. They will think it is staged to portray an ideal outdoorsy life and you are trying to make a point of some sort.

I think people spend far to much time attaching motivations to photos and statuses that take seconds to post.

annieorangutan Thu 26-Dec-13 16:23:33

Exactly mrsdevere I can see the next thread now that shockers showing how fit she is and making me feel guilty on xmas hiking with her family when Im 10 stone heavier from eating all the chocs. She is a show off bitch! grin

namechange74 Thu 26-Dec-13 16:30:30

Yep people get rather carried away with FB. I was irritated to hear of my DH's brother's engagement yesterday via FB. A call to let us know would've been nice - especially as we are the only members of the family NOT on a Christmas holiday together this year sad

VelvetSpoon Thu 26-Dec-13 16:34:21

I have lots of friends - they spend Christmas with their families, generally people do. So I really can't see how making more friends will change that.

I'm used to making the best of things, I never have any choice but to do so. But having spent all day exchanging 2 sentences with the DC who are holed up in their rooms, and have no interest in speaking to me or each other, frankly I'd rather be at work.

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