Tell me if IABU? Puppy v Baby

(143 Posts)
PMDD Thu 26-Dec-13 10:38:55

I genuinely don't know if IABU. I have a 13 week old Labrador puppy. My db has a 5 week old son, my nephew. I totally believe my new dn is far more important than my puppy. A dog is a dog, a human is a human. However, a dog is still a living creature and I wouldn't want to hurt or damage a dog.

Yesterday (Christmas Day), db came round at 4. As I answered the door he instantly said you need to lock the dog and cats away as dn is here. Dn has never been round my house before so I have never faced this.

I have always locked the cats out for my db as my dsil is very anti cats. She sees them as vermin. They can stay outside as I lock the cat flap.

I locked the puppy in her cage. They only stayed an hour and a half so that was no problem.

Today (Boxing Day), the whole family are coming round for the day. Father, Mother, brother, sister, lots of nieces and nephews and my 3 children are here - there will be 15 of us.

I can't lock my puppy in her cage all day, I don't think it is fair. However, with so many people the doors will be opening and closing constantly so it will be impractical to lock the puppy in 1 room. Also, my house is quite open plan so there isn't an obvious room to lock her in.

I know my db expects my puppy to be locked in her cage. I don't know what to do.

Alisvolatpropiis Fri 27-Dec-13 00:36:15

Your Dbis being awfully precious. I think you handled the situation well.

MeMySonAndI Fri 27-Dec-13 00:38:54

If it helps, one of my friends asked me if we were going to find new homes for our dogs once Ds was born. I told her that Ds would need to learn to sleep with all the noise. She was horrified and said it was cruel towards the baby and that she would never ever EVER put her baby through that.

Fast forward a few years and Ds had been sleeping through the night, whatever the noise, since he was a baby, her girl was still waking up at any noise by the time she was 5.

MidniteScribbler Fri 27-Dec-13 00:45:14

Anyone who threatened to kick one of my dogs would be told to immediately leave and never darken my doorstep again. There's something wrong with people who think that it's ok to be cruel to animals.

steff13 Fri 27-Dec-13 04:21:47

Ah, so they're those people who tip-toe around the house when the baby is sleeping, and end up with kids who wake up a the slightest sound. I have a couple of friends like that. I'd be afraid my kids would grow up to be troubled sleepers. I am a VERY light sleeper, and it's not fun. sad

Good on your sister for speaking up! I can't believe your SIL asked if she could kick the dog. Rude.

Morloth Fri 27-Dec-13 07:30:46

That is a lot of fuss over one small puppy.

If they are that concerned they should just not have come when you told them you couldn't crate her for the whole day.

We went to my sister's for boxing day.

Her dogs were penned for the whole time there were extra non immediate family kids running around.

TBH we wouldn't go if they were not, she knows this, but no-one makes a fuss either way - because we are not a bunch of morons and can figure it out.

TheRealAmandaClarke Fri 27-Dec-13 07:59:48

Well I think you handled it well op.
I think the leash thing was a good idea. Keeps pup away from baby but you still get to socialise/ play with your cute pup.
Happy Christmas

secretsofsanta Fri 27-Dec-13 09:11:52

Well done op. your db and sil are weird

TarkaTheOtter Fri 27-Dec-13 09:53:39

I suppose in your brother's defence he has only been a dad for 5 weeks so hopefully will look back on this and realise how ridiculous he was!

revivingsnowshower Fri 27-Dec-13 11:13:27

Well done op sounds like you handled it well. Your db sounds a bit of a pain. My dd has grown up with ddog and it has been really good. You just need a bit of common sense and a lot of dog training and it can be really positive for kids and dogs to be together.

PacificDingbat Fri 27-Dec-13 11:31:59

Oh, you handled it really well - good on your sister to making fun of your DB's preciousness; that kept you out of the 'firing line' a bit, being the owner of the puppy an'all.
I am sure they'll calm down with time - well, at least I hope they do, for your DNephew's sake..

DoYouLikeMyBaubles Fri 27-Dec-13 14:43:45

You handled it very well.

Although four hours crating is too long for a puppy. And if someone had asked me can they kick my puppy for getting to close they'd be getting booted straight out of the door.

They're setting themselves up for a whole lot of pain not letting the baby hear loud noises, being extra quiet and having subtitles on grin end up with a baby who wakes up at the sound of a pin dropping

PMDD Sat 28-Dec-13 09:27:03

I didn't crate her for 4 hours, over a period of 4 hours she was walked twice and she slept a lot after each walk. But I didn't think I should walk her for the third time but couldn't keep her in the crate for any longer.

They are super precious over everything to do with their son. Some of it is 'normal' new parent stuff, other things are just weired.

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights Sat 28-Dec-13 09:38:14

They sound more barking than your puppy fgrin

I wouldn't crate the puppy, lock the cats out or stop anyone making reasonable noise - they can choose whether to come or not. Preferably not. If she had asked me about kicking I'd have told her to leave.

Pimpf Sat 28-Dec-13 09:38:48

Your brother is an idiot. Seriously, what an absolute dick. I'm so pleased your sister laughed at him and took the piss. Seriously, barking and tv hurting his ears?

I think you need to follow your sisters lead and laugh at him every time he comes out with shit like this, talk about pfb, in fact you should start calling him that.

And re your sil, if someone asked me if they could kick my pet, I would say sure, as long as you realise I will then kick you 10 times harder. Of course it's not ok!!!! Lets hope that was a language misunderstanding. I think you coped with it well

eurochick Sat 28-Dec-13 09:38:54

They sound like nightmares. I think you handled it well.

MiaowTheCat Sat 28-Dec-13 13:08:56

I'm sorry - but to use the technical terminology - you have one right pair of plonkers on your hands. I'd have told her to leave when the kicking was mentioned personally - you'd been MORE than obliging.

Bide your time and wait with glee until the baby's mobile and trying to eat the fluff off the floor and watch the the ensuing hilarity at their reactions...

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Sat 28-Dec-13 14:47:17

If the SIL is only familiar with dogs being kept as working animals or guard dogs, the notion of a cuddly Labrador sleeping by the fireplace and lovingly nuzzling young children may be totally foreign to her.

You can intellectually know that a dog is friendly, but if most of your life experience is of deliberately terrifying guard dogs, the thought of one near your newborn is always going to be frightening.

If she had actually kicked him that would be unforgivable, but if she was just nervous and has so recently given birth I'd let it slide.

Rhubarbgarden Sat 28-Dec-13 17:48:49

They sound awful op. I think you dealt with it well although I would have had very strong words in response to the kicking suggestion - and I don't even particularly like dogs. I hope your cats weren't locked outside for the whole eight hours.

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