AIBU to find humour on male rape uncomfortable?

(70 Posts)
BabstheChicken Tue 24-Dec-13 20:31:21

Hi everyone,

First time posting, on a relatively random topic. I'm watching the film 'Horrible Bosses' and thought I'd canvas some opinions.

The film is fairly funny, but some of the humour makes me feel a bit uncomfortable. There is one man whose female boss sexually harasses him, and even goes as far as taking pictures of them in sexual positions together which she threatens to use to blackmail him. I'm just very aware that, if the genders were reversed, nobody would be laughing. Am I being over sensitive or is this an issue which society ought to address?

Oh and as it's the season cheer - Merry Christmas!

meeeemo Tue 24-Dec-13 20:42:05

hmm confused

merryxmasyafilthyanimal Tue 24-Dec-13 20:46:00

YANBU. Awful film. Not funny. Absolutely would not be acceptable if the sexes were reversed.

BabstheChicken Tue 24-Dec-13 20:46:33

meeeemo sorry, I was worried this topic would get such a response. I'm only asking because a lot of people I know would tell me to 'calm down' because 'that sort of thing doesn't really happen', but I struggle with that viewpoint because surely it seems like common sense that everyone should be treated equally with such an issue, regardless of gender?

MrsDeVere Tue 24-Dec-13 20:55:03

It makes me more than uncomfortable. It makes me angry.
However I don't agree that nobody would be laughing if the situation was reversed.
Rape 'jokes' are alive and well and doing the rounds the same as they ever were.

phantomnamechanger Tue 24-Dec-13 20:57:28

Mrs DV- hear hear just not funny either way round.

soontobeburns Tue 24-Dec-13 22:05:05

Not funny iRL but it is a great movie. I dont think its supposed to be funny persay but to highlight thats his friends think he should be happy etc but that it does bother and harass him to the point where he wants her dead.

Surely it shows that even if a sexy woman does such a thing it can still be abuse amd unwanted.

Caitlin17 Tue 24-Dec-13 22:11:28

I've never heard any rape jokes that were funny. Jimmy Carr's attempts at humour on this subject are disgraceful.

BabstheChicken Tue 24-Dec-13 22:23:21

soontobeburns I can see your argument, and think you may be right with regard to the script writers' intentions, but I'm not sure that that comes across obviously enough as the humour is drawn from the fact that the guy feels uncomfortable with his boss' behaviour, which seems to imply that 'as a man' he should obviously be enjoying it IYSWIM?

Hear hear OP. I started watching it and felt so deeply uncomfortable about the Jennifer Aniston scenes that I had to stop watching - glad I didn't go to the cinema to see it.

needaholidaynow Wed 25-Dec-13 00:13:33

Definitely. If the roles were reversed then there would be mass uproar. Not good at all to trivialise a man being sexually harassed by a woman , and as I said, if it was the other way around there would be mass uproar if such a thing was put in to a film in a "humorous" way like that.

TheBigJessie Wed 25-Dec-13 00:33:37

YANBU

Rape and sexual harassment are not funny.

MrsDeVere Wed 25-Dec-13 11:12:44

Where is the mass uproar then?

Because rape jokes about women are made every day.

Why seek to pit one against the other?

I do not understand why people do that.

Jokes about male rape are not worse or less worse. Rape is rape.

Perhaps we need to bear in mind that the uproar about rape jokes about women tends to come from women.
They are then told what humourless bitches they are.

Lazysuzanne Wed 25-Dec-13 12:15:07

Soontobe, I'm a bit confused by your post, what is a persay?

Andrewofgg Wed 25-Dec-13 12:19:26

MrsDeVere That some of my gender (and a few of yours) react as you say does not make rape by anybody of anybody less of an unfunny subject.

Wellthen Wed 25-Dec-13 12:21:45

I think the film does show that its a serious thing. His friends act all 'your boss wants to shag you, so what!' but the character himself is very uncomfortable and under pressure. Yes the extent of the sexual harassment is a bit ridiculous but I don't agree that it trivialises it - the message is that it is wrong and just as unpleasant for men as for women.

MrsDeVere Wed 25-Dec-13 12:29:00

What does that mean andrew

I don't understand why you are responding to any of my posts in that tone.

I have repeatedly expressed my view that rape jokes are never funny.

Can you explain?

BoneyBackJefferson Wed 25-Dec-13 12:34:55

Jokes about male rape are not worse or less worse. Rape is rape.

Just this, no more needs to be said

MrsDeVere Wed 25-Dec-13 12:38:37

Which is why I am confused at andrew's post.

Lazysuzanne Wed 25-Dec-13 12:49:12

Any joke is surely based on the stereotype of the always up for it man who never turns down a sexual opportunity.
Also the incorrect idea that a man cannot be threatened or intimidated by a woman.

Not seen the film, and I wouldn't find that funny, infact I'm often offended by that kind of thing.

TheDoctrineOfSanta Wed 25-Dec-13 12:59:17

YANBU.

Elizabeththefirst Wed 25-Dec-13 13:05:41

Oh god, absolutely.

Slight tangent but there was a thread on here about a man who had committed some horrific crimes.

There followed some comments, 'lets see what happens to him when he bends down in the shower in prison tonight'

Now that particular example is complicated as the criminal in question had committed some awful sexually violent crimes himself.

BUT I just don't think that sentiment should be acceptable. Would we say it about a woman criminal? 'I hope the guards rape her'?

Lazysuzanne Wed 25-Dec-13 13:16:30

Eliza, I see your point but I suspect a woman who'd committed crimes of sexual violence would be viewed in a similar way, ie that sexual assault in prison would be what she deserved?

(I'm not saying it is what either gender would deserve)

TheBigJessie Wed 25-Dec-13 13:23:31

lazysuzanne I think soontobe did a typo for per se.

Rachelx92 Wed 25-Dec-13 13:26:29

I don't find them parts funny and think there'd be complete uproar if it were vice versa

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now