AIBU to tell him to fuck off?

(19 Posts)
Stonehaven Wed 18-Dec-13 18:56:55

OH is out on his works xmas do tonight (well, from 2pm). I've got to be at work at 8 30am tomorrow so I've very helpfully arranged for a friend to take DD to school because he will be in no fit state (coach is picking them up at 2am to come home). However, he will need to pick her up at 11.30. Cue much huffing and puffing from OH.

My work xmas do is on saturday night. He is at work at 8am on the sunday. So I said to him "oh so where's my childcare for sunday then? I don't see you sorting anything out for me. Suck it up!"

I finish work at 1.30 tomorrow so I could come home and rescue him but because he is a useless twat I've got to go and do all his xmas shopping for him because he hasn't done any of it.

AIBU to tell him tough shit?

rainbow26 Wed 18-Dec-13 19:01:59

No you are def not BU.he is a man not a child so tell him to act like one!!He should be grateful that you have arranged for your friend to take your DD to school so he can have a lie in.I would be telling him more than suck it up wink.

MrsLouisTheroux Wed 18-Dec-13 19:02:04

Let him huff and puff.
Why are you doing his shopping? Forget that idea.

CaptainHindsight Wed 18-Dec-13 19:02:10


And do not do his fucking shopping!

BellaVita Wed 18-Dec-13 19:03:37

Same as Captain.

Financeprincess Wed 18-Dec-13 19:03:52

In your position I'd be telling myself that this is one of the times when you're carrying out the give part of the give & take equation! Call in the favour later rather than having a go at him now.

Stonehaven Wed 18-Dec-13 19:05:17

Oh and I've also had to ask my friend to emergency babysit on Friday because his shift has changed last minute and I'm working until 8pm. What woukd happen if MY shift changed last minute? Muggins hete woukd have to sort it!

I have to arrange childcare if I'm working on a Saturday because he plays football. I have a hobby on a Weds night. If he's working I can't go!

Sick of having to do everything myself.

And he left pubes in the bath yesterday!!


Stonehaven Wed 18-Dec-13 19:06:11


Stupid phone

MortifiedAnyFuckerAdams Wed 18-Dec-13 19:06:24

Book yourself into a little hotel with a late check out time on the Sunday.

Or cancel the childcare you have arranged for.tomorrow (or better still.move it to the morning you will.need it).

InThisTogether Wed 18-Dec-13 19:13:04

YANBU in my opinion. (but in the Christmas spirit you could be kind?) ;)

Norudeshitrequired Wed 18-Dec-13 19:15:27

YANBU. The fact that you have arranged somebody to take over the morning school run is more than your share of understanding and tolerance, especially given that you have no one to help the day after your night out.
Do not come and rescue him tomorrow and do not do his Xmas shopping for him either.

YouTheCat Wed 18-Dec-13 19:18:36

He can do his own Christmas shopping for a start. Just tell him you won't be doing it and make sure his family knows why they have nothing from him to open.

Stonehaven Wed 18-Dec-13 19:30:51

I honestly don't mind doing his xmas shopping. He gets shitty presents and I love his family and want them to have something nice to open.

Can't afford a hotel, taxi home is only a fiver.

I'm just going to quietly get on with it and hope he feels guilty. Passive-agressive I know.

LouiseAderyn Wed 18-Dec-13 19:41:28

This happens because you allow it to.

There is no way on earth I would arrange childcare if I had to work, so my partner and father of said child could bugger off to play football. If you have to work then looking after the child is his responsibility. Not sure why you are doing this and giving up your own hobby night to accommodate him.

The child belongs to both of you and isn't solely your responsibility so stop acting as if it is and make the lazy git go shopping with you if the gifts are for his family.

The definition of insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting the outcome to be different!

ConfusedDotty Wed 18-Dec-13 19:46:31


Is there no such thing as 'partnership' any more, Christmas is once a year, just enjoy it and let him enjoy his time too.

Bloodyteenagers Wed 18-Dec-13 19:51:32

There is your problem. You are going to quietly get on with it... Why? Are you his mum to run around after him? No, he isn't a child, he is an adult. It's about time he started acting like one, and you need to treat him as one. So what if he gets shitty presents. It's his business.

Stonehaven Wed 18-Dec-13 20:24:21

I know it's Christmas Dotty but it's not just at this time of year. He thinks that because he is generous with his cash that he can sit on his arse all the time and come and go as he pleases and I have to do everything.

Apparently he works so much harder than me and needs to relax on his days off. He is full time shift work. I am part time retail. So we both do difficult shifts.

Stonehaven Wed 18-Dec-13 20:25:07

Bloody and Louise I'm just sick of arguing about it to be honest.

HumbugsforChristmas Wed 18-Dec-13 22:41:03

Are you sure he isn't related to my OH?

Hasn't done a thing towards Christmas, I gave up asking him to get the decorations down, ended up doing it myself.

DD broke up from school yesterday and I was working - he works for himself, so can take time out, but no, he took her into the office and then his SIL ended up taking her to her house!

Well I am not buying his presents for HIS family. I got his nephew a birthday present today, or he wouldn't have had that, but no more.

Oh and my job isn't important either!

Sorry to hijack Stonehaven, but I totally understand where you are coming from, you are not alone!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now