Things I only ever see on Mumsnet and never in RL

(537 Posts)
HankyScore Mon 16-Dec-13 10:18:01

Wedding gift lists angst. I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where there wasn't a list. It's normal.

Parents who never have even a sniff of booze when their kids are in the house, and the angst over 'what if I need to drive them to hospital?'. Perhaps everyone I know is a raging alky, but it's just never come up as an issue.

Old ladies on the bus having a pop about breastfeeding/children/the yoof of today. Has never happened to me in all my eleven years of parenting. I only ever meet nice people on public transport. Perhaps I am just incredibly thick skinned and don't notice the judgy stares?

People giving much of a shit over BF/FF, or at least not once they are past their own days of feeding a baby.

There is more.

I'm off to think of some.

MylesKennedysVocalCords Mon 16-Dec-13 10:44:12

People whose sons love pink and wearing princess dresses/tutus etc. Never seen it in RL!

pianodoodle Mon 16-Dec-13 10:45:02

If a friend is having a RL rant over coffee with us about a partner and says "Sometimes I could just shake him" we don't all gasp and start giving a lecture about violence grin

DadOnIce Mon 16-Dec-13 10:47:43

Yes, people who "don't know" what the various levels, tables etc. mean in school are usually pretending!

Also never met anyone who made such a judgy fuss about breastfeeding. It's been a few years since DW breastfed ours, but I just don't remember it being a huge issue whether you did or not.

People who divide things into "blue jobs" and "pink jobs". WTAF?

People who make their DHs do the housework after they get in from a 12-hour shift at the desk/coalface/chalkface/lathe.

No women in my family or friendship group have ever (as far as I'm aware) had a random man walk up to them and tell them to "smile!", etc.

The whole "which school should I choose" debate is totally academic for most people we know, who have known for several years which school they are going to send their children too - either because they have no choice, or because they specifically planned to move into a particular catchment.

DHs who are given "permission" to go out and told off like children if they stay out late.

Pretty much everything to do with weddings. Bridezillas, list mania, etc.

Know a few people who don't drive, though. Not unusual.

BananaNotPeelingWell Mon 16-Dec-13 10:48:34

Party bag disapproval. People who ask others about what Christmas traditions they ought to be starting. Talk about micro managing your lifeconfused...Yes to ALL else mentioned.

WigWearer Mon 16-Dec-13 10:49:16

Not working. I don't know any SAHMs. We all fucking have to work

BohemianGirl Mon 16-Dec-13 10:50:44

Ah I have (re the 'pink boy') he was rather too fond of his sisters Snow white outfit - didn't suit him at all, he was a rather chunky little fella!

I wonder how he turned out.

WigWearer Mon 16-Dec-13 10:51:13

Oh god, yes, the 'school choice' agony.

They go to the local school. This may be a country vs town phenomenon, admittedly.

BohemianGirl Mon 16-Dec-13 10:51:53

Another MN phenomenon - women who 'have their own business from home' .... childminding/avon/betterware is not a business, it is pin money.

AscoyneDAscoyne Mon 16-Dec-13 10:51:56

People who don't leave their kids in the car at the petrol station lest their car explodes.

BananaNotPeelingWell Mon 16-Dec-13 10:52:38

I'm always amazed at how many self diagsones of 'narc' people seem to be around on mn. Never hear anyone speak of it in rl.

Yellowcake Mon 16-Dec-13 10:53:04

Gosh, I don't drive (though have just started to learn), I will point out to anyone addressing envelopes that I am Dr Myname, not Mrs Husbandsname, I've had several total strangers (including one man who told me he was a recently arrived African asylum seeker) take issue with me for formula feeding my baby, have certainly seen buggy wars on buses in London when we lived there. I have certainly found my tactless, well-meaning MiL very difficult down the years, but she is my husband's mother, so I persevere.

Actually, driving is IMPOSSIBLE. Can I just say how much I admire all of you who can drive? You are made of better stuff than me.

I agree the 'toxic' label is a sort of Mumsnet meme borrowed from self-help books. What bothers me is that I don't think it's necessarily a helpful label - all it means in the context of human relationships is 'I experience Person X as unpleasant', whereas it sounds like an official diagnosis.

CranberrySaucyJack Mon 16-Dec-13 10:53:14

People who would never dream of calling their kids names under their breath/on FB/when talking to friends/yadda yadda.

HankyScore Mon 16-Dec-13 10:53:16

I made over 2k a month from Childminding, it's hardly pin money.....

HankyScore Mon 16-Dec-13 10:53:43

Avon and Betterware etc though, I'd have to agree, I don't know anyone who makes proper money from it.

BigChocolateOrange Mon 16-Dec-13 10:54:27

People who ask what they should by from Aldi/Lidl.

And people who struggle to buy something for themselves if they're given gift vouchers or the like. It's really never a problem for me!

MylesKennedysVocalCords Mon 16-Dec-13 10:54:42

ooh and people who can't leave their 15 year old alone in the house for 30 seconds whilst they post a letter, lest they get run over/kidnapped by terrorists/abducted by aliens

DontmindifIdo Mon 16-Dec-13 10:54:59

Christmas eve hampers! I mentioned them in passing to some more organised Mummy friends, none had heard of them, although Christmas jimjams are very much a thing, but the consensus amongst RL friends seems to be you have new jammies because its the only time of the year you're photographed in them.

MN relationship section is an eye opener, I can never quite get over just how much shit some woman will put up with! (but perhaps I know people in RL with equally shit relationships, just they hide it well)

The people who buy 4-5 buggies, surely you buy one when you're pregnant, use that until your DCs walk? Possibly when you go back to work, get a cheap unbrella fold if you need to leave it at a nursery/childminders (as they normally ask for it to fold up small)- or get something to leave at a grandparent's house, but otherwise, who are these people who keep buying buggy after buggy rather than just using the one they've got? The only people I know who've bought replacements are because they had DC2 before DC1 was walking and needed a double, and one friend who managed to break hers.

Yellowcake Mon 16-Dec-13 10:56:19

Oh, my one year old son is currently wearing a pink hula skirt and a witch's hat. Pink, completely unprompted by me, is his favourite colour at the moment. He borrowed a pink Zbarbie car from the toy library last time.

And have certainly had male strangers telling me to smile. Not in the least unusual, unfortunately.

friday16 Mon 16-Dec-13 10:56:53

People who "have" to spend unpleasant Christmases with people they don't like, planned months in advance.

people finding kittens, i would love to find a lost kitten.

LadyInDisguise Mon 16-Dec-13 10:57:12

I might be strange but actually have heard about quite a few of these things in RL.

People who are undiagnosed because getting a diagnosis is an issue.
Toxic parents (my grand parents, esp my grand mother, were certainly toxic).
Comments about bfing (I got both some 'looks' from people passing by and people coming to see me to tell me how wonderful it was!)
Screen time is certainly in place at most of my dcs friends....
I can go on.

Or maybe I am living in a MN holding and I didn't quite realized lol.

BohemianGirl Mon 16-Dec-13 10:57:50

Tooth fairy angst - its a quid - no debate needed

Santa angst - he's real grin no debate needed

Easter bunny - he shits eggs - thats that one nailed too

Gileswithachainsaw Mon 16-Dec-13 10:57:54

This elf on the shelf stuff

People who make a fuss over what milk a baby has

People who know the ins and outs of every formula just so they can tell you how crap it it.

People who won't leave children with anyone.

Children over the age of three who can't be left downstairs while mum showers.

People who are so afraid of loo brushes.

People who need to remind themselves dogs exist before leaving house.

People who can make one chicken serve six people a day for a week.

desertmum Mon 16-Dec-13 10:58:00

Love this thread - makes me feel 'relatively' normal (although I have to admit to a couple of them - my son wore a pink tutu for a while - now he just looks gay in johdpurs grin. One time we went out and had a few drinks we got home to a very sick son who needed to go to hospital - so we took a taxi - simples. The worst part was we were living in a country where alcohol was banned, so had to stand as far away from the staff as possible to not breath alcoholic fumes on them while still managing to console poor DS. Obviously (before anyone says anything) we weren't blind drunk, just had a couple of glasses of home brew.

HanneHolm Mon 16-Dec-13 10:58:13

fricking christmas fricking traditions

YOU DONT START A TRADITION IT JUST HAPPENS YOU FRAEKS

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