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AIBU?

To really want to have both Xmas and birthday presents even tho my bday is 29 December?

71 replies

Scarletohello · 22/11/2013 22:25

Ok so just to state this is not about me being materialistic, it's more about fairness. As a kid I often got joint bday and Xmas presents and as an adult because my bday is so near Xmas I simply feel like I don't have a bday. I'm so jealous of people who have their bday in the summer and have a picnic or something equally lovely whereas mine is just overlooked. Also, I buy my friends am Xmas an bday present but with me I either get one or the other. It's not about the present just want an acknowlement that I have a fucking birthday!!!

Don't think there's really anything anyone can say that will help me but just wanted a bit of a rant....

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fifi669 · 22/11/2013 22:27

YANBU! I'd want two presents and I'd certainly want MY day. Best friend has Christmas, her DH birthday and we doing anniversary all within a week but manages to separate them all.

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fifi669 · 22/11/2013 22:28

We doing = wedding

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Cantsleep · 22/11/2013 22:30

My ds1 birthday is 29 December too. He's always upset as nobody can usually make it to his party and he never seems interested in birthday presents as its so close to Xmas.

Yanbu to want both.

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ladypete · 22/11/2013 22:31

I think YANBU seeing as it's not the material things you're after, just a bit of birthday recognition! It's like the kids in born in August when I was as school... everyone else forgets about them!

Could you perhaps do "post xmas bday drinks" and have a bit of a do? You never know - they might bring a present for you Grin

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nicky2512 · 22/11/2013 22:33

YANBU. DS was born on Christmas day and I make a huge fuss of his birthday to try to stop him missing out. I definitely think he gets less presents and cards than his sister. Close family though make an effort to keep birthday and Christmas separate. He doesn't get his birthday presents until later in the day when the excitement about Santa dies down and Santa always leaves him a special birthday present too!

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tintingirl · 22/11/2013 22:33

Just celebrate your birthday on 29th June. Tell everyone not to bother as it is so close to Christmas and say you'd like to celebrate your 1/2 years instead!

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Binkyridesagain · 22/11/2013 22:34

My Dsis bday is the 24th, I have always made sure that her xmas and b'day presents are separate and we have always had well attended parties for her on the day (parents seem to enjoy getting rid of their kids for a few hours on xmas eve)

She has received combined presents of other family members which upsets her as generally she has been made to wait until xmas day to receive them.

YANBU.

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mumbaisapphire · 22/11/2013 22:34

YANBU! I don't have a December birthday but I have had family members and friends with December bdays including a close family member on Xmas Eve. I always buy separate gifts and wrap birthday ones in birthday paper and Xmas gifts in Xmas paper. Everything separate just as if their birthday were in April! It's absolutely the fairest thing. I thinks it's very unfair to lump it all in together.....unless the person themselves said that they would like a certain item that was perhaps very expensive and they were happy to double up so to speak. Hope that makes sense!

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Parisbanana · 22/11/2013 22:34

Ds's birthday is also Dec 29th so I really feel for you.
We are very very conscious that it should be his special day and we have never given him joint presents.
My cousin has her birthday on the 28th and decided years ago that she was going to celebrate her birthday on 28 June instead. So she does. She has presents then (summer presents!), has a picnic or similar, and has never regretted doing it. I think she has friends who probably don't know it isn't her birthday in June! She has just a little special gift from her parents and husband on her real birthday, just a little something to acknowledge the real birthday, and it definitely seems to work for her.

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Scarletohello · 22/11/2013 22:38

Aw thanks for the lovely replies so quickly! I thought I wd get lots of replies telling me I'm just being a selfish arse.. On my 40th I had a party mid Jan which was great as everyone came! I know it's a difficult, inconvenient and expensive time of year but its just the acknowledgement that's so important.

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Dilidali · 22/11/2013 22:52

I actually LOVE celebrating birthdays after christmas. It is a continuation of the party season. So no, YANBU.
I take great pleasure in chosing a present and card and choosing an outfit for the visit/lunch/dinner. I insist we do something, no matter how small for these birthdays.

Ask friends round, OP, you might be surprised :)

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Fukeit · 22/11/2013 22:55

Yanbu.

Birthday presents wrapped in Christmas paper is really annoying.

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DamnBamboo · 22/11/2013 22:56

YADNBU. My youngest child ( I have 4 and he will be 4 next bday) was born on Dec 28th. I am always very conscious to make sure that he has a separate birthday to Christmas.

He's little and we always have a separate party etc. but it's his day and we really try to make it an entirely separate occasion from christmas. Happy birthday for your next one BTW x x x

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DamnBamboo · 22/11/2013 22:57

And we always have birthday cards, birthday paper and a birthday cake.

No christmas decorations allowed!

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BookFairy · 22/11/2013 23:00

YANBU. I have a December birthday and often get birthday presents wrapped in Christmas paper as people 'have loads of it in atm'. Makes me a bit :( that they can't make an effort when they would do for birthdays in the other 11 months of the year.

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123rd · 22/11/2013 23:02

My DF and best mate have bday v close to Xmas but I always buy separate pressies

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notso · 22/11/2013 23:05

29th is my wedding anniversary I love it because DH is always off work.

I have a birthday a week before Christmas and apart from when I was under 10 when I used to get a combined present from my Aunty and it was always orange matchmakers which I hate. I have never had joint presents.

YANBU anyway!

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changingtoaskthis · 22/11/2013 23:05

Im giving baby DS a half birthday in June as his birthday is 3 days before Christmas

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Bettercallsaul1 · 22/11/2013 23:07

OP - That is exactly the suggestion I was going go make - to celebrate your birthday in mid January instead. Have a small party or get-together as a specific birthday celebration and make sure you get your proper birthday attention then! I think it is a real shame when birthdays get blurred into Christmas.

Everyone else gets their specialday ( and presents too!) Why shouldn't you?

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Purple2012 · 22/11/2013 23:08

Yanbu. My friends birthday is the same day as yours. I always get a Christmas and birthday present separate and make sure the birthday present isnt something christmassy. My Sils birthday is new year and I do the same with her.

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LaFataTurchina · 22/11/2013 23:09

YANBU

Mine's the 28th. My friends and I don't tend to do presents but they'll all come for out for birthday drinks. But my parents, DP and DBro all give me christmas and birthday presents, and don't wrap the birthday ones in chrismas paper.

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Anja1Cam · 22/11/2013 23:12

Definitely YANBU. DH is on the 24th. We always make sure we have two sets of celebrations well separated. And two sets of presents. But of course he's never had much stuff from friends that are not family nor many parties. Once we made a point of having a big party 6months deferred.

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DoctorWhoPrefersToFlySolo · 22/11/2013 23:14

YANBU!!

My Dd's birthday is on Boxing Day! I refuse to meld the two occasions into one even though I did do this to my godson 20 years ago Blush it was an expensive gift though! and in all honesty, his mother has never bought for my Dc's at all which I find a bit annoying.

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HarpyFishwifeTwat · 22/11/2013 23:18

YANBU at all. My birthday is also 29th December and I'm so grateful to my mum for insisting that I always celebrated my birthday as a birthday. Even though it was always during the school holidays I had lots of parties just for my birthday and never got joint presents (until I was much older and hetting big presents like a TV for my room)

I totally understand that it's nothing to do with being materialistic - just wanting a little individual acknowledgement. NU at all.

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 22/11/2013 23:18

DS's birthday is 3rd December, and despite there being 3 weeks between that and Christmas day he has had Christmas cards instead of birthday cards and presents wrapped in Christmas paper. He also had the "we haven't got you a birthday gift as we are getting you something for Christmas instead" Hmm wonder if I can say that back to them in summer when it is their birthday?!

YANBU at all.
I ban all Christmas things in our home until after DS's birthday and make a big thing of his special day - lot's of balloons and banners etc.

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