to fund raise for something I need

(72 Posts)
tolittletoolate Sun 17-Nov-13 13:21:49

I'm disabled and use a wheelchair all the time. We live in an area with loads of cycle paths and my dh and dd both have bikes and go out cycling together. I would love to join them but hand cycles for disabled people are hideously expensive.
The other day I thought that if my dh did something to raise money to buy one for me (he is an ultra runner) then people could donate towards it and maybe then I could get one. It would make a huge difference to my life and also enable me to exercise.
Is it a good idea or a bit cheeky?

Canthisonebeused Sun 17-Nov-13 16:04:49

I don't think a one off holiday and the means to improve long term quality of life and reducing the barriers to long term quality time with ones family can really be compared as the as the same end result elskov.

ImperialBlether Sun 17-Nov-13 16:14:36

Elskov, you really are coming across as bloody miserable.

OP, let us all know if he goes ahead. You might find not everyone feels the same way as Elskov.

Are you talking about a sponsored cycle or something else? Lots of other ways to raise money other than sponsorship. Arrange a party with a raffle, for example. Or a shopping evening with stalls. If it is a sponsored event, hand on heart I'd prefer to sponsor someone who was specific about where the money was going than a large National charity where most of the money doesn't get where I would want it to.

elskovs Sun 17-Nov-13 17:02:31

Sorry if you think I was being unkind OP. I am sick of being asked to sponsor people to do something they enjoy, so yes I probably do sound quite down on it.

It looks like plenty of people would be willing to help out though so it will likely be a success.

Good luck

tolittletoolate Sun 17-Nov-13 17:25:05

wow, thanks everyone I'm quite overwhelmed at the support from all of you.
elskovs I do kind of know where you're coming from and I agree with you about being asked to sponsor people to do stuff they enjoy. I don't think you are being mean. It was one of the reasons I decided to ask on here and in AIBU to get a clear picture of what people thought of the idea.

lougle Sun 17-Nov-13 17:45:51

Serious question:

Why is it ok for Charities to give to children in need, many of whom have disabilities, and this is seen as a GOOD THING, yet once the child turns 18 that same act is seen as 'begging' 'scrounging' or 'asking for cash'?

Parents raise money for equipment the NHS can't provide for their children. Why can't an adult do the same?

A former colleague's daughter is a quadruple amputee thanks to meningitis and I've given money towards her fund for new prostheses, adapted bikes and so on. I don't see how this is any different, so YANBU.

Mumpiring Sun 17-Nov-13 18:51:22

NYANBU, that's something I'd give a euro to and I don't know you. It's just something different that would make somebody happy. It's money obviously but it's not a material possession.

I am not married and I thought (cheekily, in a light hearted way) that when I got to forty I should send out a list saying 'right, that's it folks, you've given up on my ever getting married, but don't be shy, give me a toaster anyway'

Mumpiring Sun 17-Nov-13 18:54:04

You should set up a page. Would mumsnet allow it.

superbagpuss Sun 17-Nov-13 19:09:30

we have a friend who's DC needed equipment to help her and we donated

we also know of people who's son lost his legs to meningitis so I did a sponsored event to help get new legs as he grows out of them

if you were honest why you needed the money and I had some spare I would donate

Lou, I think people forget that kids with SN will one day be adults. sad

OP, go for it!

elskovs Sun 17-Nov-13 19:16:49

Good point Lougle. I don't know why, but its true.

azzbiscuit Sun 17-Nov-13 19:22:01

As long as you are upfront and don't in any way misrepresent what the money is for, nor allow anyway to draw the wrong conclusions then fine. Some people may not agree but they can't complain if you've been clear with the facts esp. that the money is for you.

(Personally I can't say I would sponsor somebody who does running for a hobby to go running, but that's probably just me).

azzbiscuit Sun 17-Nov-13 19:22:41

allow anyone*

LEMisafucker Sun 17-Nov-13 19:25:05

elskovs - it is nothing like asking for a holiday :/ Loads of people raise money for their children or a specific person - I would actually quite like to donate to something like this as at least i know my money would be going and making a real difference to one person rather than a drop in the ocean to many. If that makes sense.

Maybe once you have your bike thangamajig you could do some sort of sponsored cycle to raise money for a charity close to your heart.

If you do do something, im up for donating - im skint, but every little helps and i'd happily part with a fiver. Do post your "just giving" page or whatever it is when you donate online, loads of mnetters would happily donate im sure.

LEMisafucker Sun 17-Nov-13 19:27:40

I don't mean to pick on you elskvos but just felt i wanted to pick up on your second post - most people are sponsored to do things they enjoy doing, generally they are raising money for other charities, so i would rather someone raise money doing something they love than doing something they hate - unless of course you would like me to sponsor you for ironing - i don't really have much money so couldnt help financially but quite happy to provide you with a pile of clothes smile

I think it is reasonable to ask. It's shocking that there is so little funding for disabled people to buy equipment that they desperately need.

My mother is paraplegic. She needs an electric wheelchair because the level at which her spine is damaged makes her arms too weak to push a manual wheelchair. Suitable electric wheelchairs can cost £20,000. Occupational health will fund her one new basic manual chair every ten years. She currently has some savings that will cover her needs for the next few years, but they are being depleted by the cost of carers and equipment. Once that money runs out, I can see myself and my siblings having to fundraise for the money to cover her basic needs.

azzbiscuit Sun 17-Nov-13 19:52:56

so i would rather someone raise money doing something they love than doing something they hate

The problem I have with this is that when people say they are 'raising' money, what is really happening is that other people go to work, earn money through labour and give it to the charity, directly or indirectly. If the person doing the sponsored event isn't putting themselves out or doing something useful (or you could say 'charitable), and isn't contributing any money, what exactly are they doing apart from taking the credit and the glory? On this basis I refuse to sponsor anybody who isn't doing something in some way useful, I'll just continue to contribute to what I personally believe in.

Anyway I know this stuff doesn't bother most people, so I'm not trying to put the OP off.

A car isn't something you Need, though. A lot of people without disabilities/sn can work.

A lot of equipment for people with disabilities is ridiculously expensive and if you are unable to work, then what?

A basic grade 1 braille book is £16. You can buy a book for a sighted child at Shelter for £1,50. A cane can be anywhere from £29 to £53 at RNIB, a talking scanner is £1,700.... Basic talking software for laptop is £900 (staff at action for the blind told me.)

If you are able bodied you can work in a restaurant, cleaning, etc. It is hard to find work if you have a disability and no qualifications (believe me, I know) I volunteered for Shelter after only being in the UK for 1 week, so I give what I can to society.

Having tools to make life easier, get an education, job is one thing. Going on holiday is another. Biking through Asia for charity is yet another.

Sorry should be cannot work

tolittletoolate Mon 18-Nov-13 10:41:24

Who said anything about working and needing a car?
I have a motability car and my husband works. I worked full time until my illness 3 years ago and up until we moved I had a part time job in Asda on the checkouts.

I was merely asking for people's opinion about buying a piece of equipment that is very expensive. Something that I could never afford to buy myself.

Claire Lomas who walked the London Marathon last year in a Rewalk robotic suit raised £40,000 to buy one of her own. That is no different from what I'm suggesting.

Lou, I am considering starting a charity in the UK (still a maybe) but something for adults with SN.

I grew up in the US, attended a school for deaf/blind/SN and am appalled to see how much my classmates struggle. Schools (and parents, please don't get offended) overprotect us and because many childen are at different stages compared to theipeers, adulthood is pushed to the back of some teachers', social workers minds.

Disability/SN doesn't stop at 18.

Toolittle, I understand you completely.

Someone mentioned saving for a car and I was trying to explain that people with disabilities need certain things to have a better quality of life.

In your case a motability car and your cycle. In mine, my cane, reading glasses and my reading machine

Little, I just PM'd you. smile

Do you have a blog? You could start one (and even raise awareness at the same time) youtube videos, facebook

Faverolles Mon 18-Nov-13 11:15:40

Fundraising for yourself is fine.
I'm involved with fundraising for a little girl in my village. Everyone assumes that the government/NHS hands out everything you need, when the amount they give often doesn't even cover the basics.
As soon as the word disabled is mentioned, prices of things shoot up, which means that things that able bodied people take for granted are quite often out of reach of someone disabled - adult or child, and the only way to get these things is to fundraise.
Go for it. Good luck thanks

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