to think that it is not normal for 14 year olds to be sexually active?

(196 Posts)
landrover Tue 05-Nov-13 18:30:41

Reading an earlier thread, one poster said that it is generally accepted that 14 to 15 year olds were sexually active!
Do you think that this is true? I am curious because I have a ten year old daughter, I need to know when I start worrying!

Sparklymommy Tue 05-Nov-13 18:33:54

I was sexually active at 14.

Having said that I also have a ten year old dd and the thought of her being sexually active in four (three, she's nearly 11!!!) years terrifies me!

My husband was 18 when he lost his virginity. To me.

I don't think it's 'normal' but I was very mature and most of my friends were older than me. I'm not proud of it.

lljkk Tue 05-Nov-13 18:34:01

It is normal for most 14-15yos to want to be sexually active.
I dare say it is biologically hardwired for most of them.
Doesn't mean it's healthy for them.

ForeverFrozen Tue 05-Nov-13 18:34:06

I wasn't sexually active when I was 14 but a hell of a lot of my friends were and that was the mid-90s, I'm sure a higher proportion are sexually active at that age now.

landrover Tue 05-Nov-13 18:35:21

EEEkkk Its going to be so hard when I send her off to High school!!!!! Chastity belts anyone?

It's not usual no.

In a class of 30, one or two will be.

Seen a lot of classes, and a lot of kids.
Even at 16 less than a third will be.

Statistics say the average age is still 17.

I was, but it makes me very nervy to think that in three years time sd could be. i supppse it depenfs on a variety of things but it definitely happens

Tanfastic Tue 05-Nov-13 18:36:34

Loads of my friends were sexually active at 14, in fact my best friend was from 13 and pregnant at 16. I don't think times have changed that much.

I'm 40 by the way.

insancerre Tue 05-Nov-13 18:36:58

yes, from my experience of having a teenage daughter
though, obviously, that's not all 14/15 year olds but a large enough percentage of them are

landrover Tue 05-Nov-13 18:37:07

Phew, thanks Laurie! x

AnyFuckerReporting Tue 05-Nov-13 18:37:52

My husband was about 13, I was 15. Most of my friends were around 15/16. Quite normal where I am from but now I'm an adult I do an internal shudder when I think about children that young having sex.

Lamu Tue 05-Nov-13 18:38:03

It's the same as asking how long is a piece of string. I have a Dd and will be worrying about this in 10 yrs time.

I'm sure there are 12,13 year olds who are sexually active. As well as 17,18,19 yr olds who are not. I was 17 when i finally did. Having an open relationship with your Dd is far more important IMHO. She'll then come to you when she thinks she's ready.

Boardingblues Tue 05-Nov-13 18:38:35

I agree that it is normal to be sexually interested. To be sexually active at 14 is not good as it is too early IMHO. It is below the age of consent.

landrover Tue 05-Nov-13 18:38:54

Yep Any, I think thats the problem, my daughter is my ten year old baby still!

MuffCakes Tue 05-Nov-13 18:39:01

I was at 14, so were most of my friends, 14 was the age sex and booze took hold grin I had a great time.

GreenVelvet Tue 05-Nov-13 18:39:34

Whatever happened to romance?! hmm

14-19 year olds are often romantically interested in the opposite sex. Its a natural state methinks.

Think Romeo & Juliet!

Not every teenager has to get busy in the bedroom, though there is a lot of pressure on them to do so.

Personally, I would delay it as looooooong as possible.

landrover Tue 05-Nov-13 18:39:59

Do ebay sell chastity belts then?grin

ILetHimKeep20Quid Tue 05-Nov-13 18:40:22

I was, a few friends were too. Late 90s

Mim78 Tue 05-Nov-13 18:40:28

I would say not normal, though normal to be interested. But obviously it does happen quite a lot - I think I'm defining normal as acceptable rather than common though.

RoseRedder Tue 05-Nov-13 18:41:25

I was 17 coming up 18 and felt I was 'last' as all my friends were saying they had been 'doing' it from about 15.

Talking to them later it turns out most were just saying it too look cool

Lamu Tue 05-Nov-13 18:42:01

My experience from school was that everyone was saying they were at it at about 13/14. I think the reality is that it was a lot of bravado especially from the boys.

landrover Tue 05-Nov-13 18:42:39

Rose, I wondered about the "looking cool" element, whether kids are just making a lot of this up to show off to their mates!

I would say less than 25% of my contemporaries were. I'm mid thirties btw. 14 is too young imo.

PukingCat Tue 05-Nov-13 18:45:48

I was 15, my best friend was 14 and so were a couple of others. One got pregnant and the other had to give a statement and the man went to prison.

Perhaps i hung around with the wrong people!

I was 16 but then I went to a single sex convent school so didn't get the opportunity before then. I definitely wanted to be sexually active so I don't doubt that if I'd had the chance at 14 I would have been

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