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AIBU?

To expect my two teenage DC to put their school uniform in the wash?

45 replies

showmethemoneyhoney · 20/10/2013 21:27

Just lost it with the DC. Did three massive loads of washing yesterday and asked the DC to make sure all the school clothes were in the pile to go in the wash. Washing basket was emptied. DS goes upstairs and asks where his school clothes are for tomorrow. I assumed they were in the pile of clean stuff I put on their beds earlier. They weren't. Thought I was going barmy as I knew I'd done all the washing and having already asked them to put the stuff out I wrongly thought they'd actually done it. After ranting for ten minutes and ripping the airing cupboard apart looking for lost clothes, I look in the previously empty laundry basket and lo and behold the bloody stuff is in there dirty. They have other uniform so I'm not worried that they'll have nothing to wear tomorrow, I'm just really pissed off that they cannot do a basic task like put the stuff out when asked. I think I'm more mad than usual because they are exceptionally lazy around the house and this was just the icing on the cake. I feel guilty because I was screaming at them and in the whole grand scheme of things, it really isn't a big deal. Any tips on how to get the little buggers to help a bit more? They are 14 and 15, so well able to help themselves.

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redexpat · 20/10/2013 21:31

So... tell them from now on that if it isnt it the laundry basket by a certain time, then it doesn't get done. And follow through. If they have to go to school in smelly uniform then so be it.

marriedinwhiteisback · 20/10/2013 21:35

I just rifle through the kit bags and tidy the bedroom floors when I want to do the washing. TBF DS at nearly 19 is now much improved.

This might sound sad but I quite enjoy hanging up dd's blouses every week and making sure everything for the coming week is in apple pie order for her. I luffs her you see and I want everything perfect for her.

redexpat · 20/10/2013 21:37

married is clearly a much nicer person than I am!

FryOneFatManic · 20/10/2013 21:38

Every Friday I tell the kids to ensure their uniform is in the wash. I then, to make double sure it's done, tell them to put a load of washing on and to follow through until it's all dry.

frogspoon · 20/10/2013 21:41

If they miss the laundry, just tell them they'll either have to wash it themselves, or wear unwashed uniform. Eventually they will end up going to school in unwashed uniform, they will learn their lesson and won't do it again.

Don't have a go at them, because this shouldn't actually be affecting you at all, it only affects them. There is no reason for you to get angry and scream at them.

Fakebook · 20/10/2013 21:42

I was washing my own uniform aged 12. Probably a bit younger because my sister was doing it before me and used to wash my clothes with hers. Stop the mollycoddling. Send them to school in a stinky uniform and make sure they're taught how to use a washing machine.

dyslexicdespot · 20/10/2013 21:43

Stop doing their laundry! They have to learn sooner or later.

hettienne · 20/10/2013 21:46

14 and 15? Why aren't they doing their own laundry?

teenagetantrums · 20/10/2013 21:46

My teenagers do most of their own washing, i will do it if its in the dirty washing if its on their floor it can stay there after years of nagging i have given up with life's to short to for me to stress about them wearing dirty clothes.

DismemberedDwerf · 20/10/2013 21:47

I have a 'if it's not in the wash basket I'm not washing it' rule. Dd2 missed karate this week because she said her gi was clean when it wasn't. To be fair, using the washing machine is so easy, a five year old could do it, so it's not unreasonable that a child twice that age could manage it.

Topseyt · 20/10/2013 21:48

Not at all unreasonable. The rule in this house is that if it isn't in the wash then it won't get done, and tough if they don't like that.

Keep going as you are, and don't do a special load right now because of it. They should have put it in the wash, but they didn't. So, they can face the consequences.

TiredDog · 20/10/2013 21:51

14 and 15? Why aren't they doing their own laundry?

This!

Seriously? Who nominated you skivvy? Teenagers are very capable of finding the on button on a washing machine and it's a great lesson learning about domestic chores

jammypuddingmonkey · 20/10/2013 21:53

We have 3 linen baskets- if it's not in one, it won't get washed. One is only towels. Both other baskets have been washed. My oldest told me earlier-after a fake 'I could've sworn I put it downstairs'- that it's ok because he has more uniform (the ones he put in the basket upstairs are washed anyway, but he doesn't know that). I don't know where my dd's uniform is, but it's not in the wash as far as I've seen.

dyslexicdespot · 20/10/2013 21:53

I have meet so many first year uni students that have never had to care for themselves on the most basic level. Their parents have not done them any favours.

FryOneFatManic · 20/10/2013 21:55

My DCs are aged 13 and nearly 10. They have been putting their washing on for at least the last 2 years, and do other chores around the house.

My brother and I were expected to do chores as youngsters and especially in our teenage years.

14 and 15 is plenty old enough to be responsible for their own uniform.

TiredDog · 20/10/2013 21:55

My DD at uni has told me how pleased she is that I made her so independent

LegoStillSavesMyLife · 20/10/2013 21:58

Dunno about teenagers but my 6 and 4 year old know to put the dirty clothes they take off in the laundry basket. (Being 6 and 4 their clothes are always dirty so no sorting is required)

DismemberedDwerf · 20/10/2013 22:00

dyslexicdespot I agree totally. My dd1 moved home for a while with her partner, he could not cook a single meal nor had washed his own clothes. He definitely knowing how to do this. Ds on the other hand used to do all his own washing and I even confidently left him for several days looking after two younger siblings, so he was doing all the cooking and things. He was 17 then.

RandomMess · 20/10/2013 22:04

My 11 year old is a dab hand at cooking pasta and grated cheese for her and younger sibling, I'm not sure that clean clothes will motivate her in the same way that food does though

YoniGetAnOohWithTyphoo · 20/10/2013 22:06

they won't like it and will prob moan till the cows come home but they need to learn to do it. in 3-4 years time they'll have to do it themselves if they go to uni or whatever so learning how to wash their shirts without turning them pink now will do them the power of good. it only takes 1 minute to load a wash, and another minute to take it out and put it in the dryer or whatever, so it's hardly an unreasonable demand. just maybe have a talk with them to explain the new system rather than hitting the roof next time haha ;)

NoComet · 20/10/2013 22:10

Never do the weekend washing without counting in and out the correct numbers of skirts, blouses, jumpers and trousers.

They may put it to wash or they may not, but 6.30 am on a Monday morning is not the time to have a tantrum from DD2 about dirty clothes.

Actually the only suitable time for a tantrum off DD2 is when you can leave the house and let her get on with it.

ravenlocks · 20/10/2013 22:11

To those asking 'why aren't they doing own laundry' ... Doesn't that mean a whole bunch of half loads going on all the time? My kids aren't teens yet but I'd imagine when they are laundry would still get done and sorted on a household basis. I would imagine - "sort your whites for laundry and bring them down, machine going on in 10 mins". That's what my DPs did, although I did my own ironing as a teen and one of my chores was to hang washing out and bring it off the line.

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mrsjay · 20/10/2013 22:12

if it is not in the basket it is not washed simple as I dont bother getting them to do their washing I just stick it all in I have seen washing sneaking in on a sunday afternoon which I will do but sunday night nah I would be febreezing and sending them out, I did not wash it one week and dd1 never did it again

mrsjay · 20/10/2013 22:14

My dds can use the washing machine but I dont understand their clothes your clothes etc it would be loads of half loads I didnot buy a big arse drum machine to do half loads

SilasGreenback · 20/10/2013 22:15

I now make my older two sort the washing - so I might say to one I need the school shirts - this means find me 15 shirts, undo all buttons, unroll sleeves etc. They are quickly seeing how annoying it can be if your siblings don't put things in the right basket but leave it screwed up in a sports bag so see why I end up shouting on a Friday.

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