To think the midwife will not give two hoots about my bikini line?

(338 Posts)
IneedAsockamnesty Fri 18-Oct-13 22:02:37

I'm going into hospital in just over a week to be induced, I can not see my bikini line and am disinclined to brandish a razor and any sharp bladed object near something I cannot see.

So will the midwife even notice let alone care?

spicynaknik Fri 18-Oct-13 22:22:38

A good giggle? If your job involves seeing fanjo after fanjo of heavily pregnant women, why on earth would it be funny that someone hadn't trimmed their pubes for a while? Like it wasn't the norm. Jeez.

They won't care two hoots.

CoconutRing Fri 18-Oct-13 22:24:51

Some MWs laugh at ladies bikini lines because some MWs are not very nice people.

pigsDOfly Fri 18-Oct-13 22:26:56

What? You're about to give birth and you're worrying about your pubic hair?

Why would the midwife notice or care.

Yes, TombRaiding, if you're in your 30s or older, when your Mum gave birth they would have shaved her, they also gave you an enema when you were in early labour (yes really).

I had that with my first baby, who is now 33. By the time I got to the next one, 5 years later, they'd stopped doing either, thank god.

IneedAsockamnesty Fri 18-Oct-13 22:26:56

Hang on...youre pregnant?!

grin. Yep, at least I bloody hope so seen as I'm huge now,of course they could all be fibbing to me about it being an actual real baby and it could just be really bad wind.

Joking, I am indeed,I'm being induced at 36 weeks because my mobility issues and sickness are causing to many concerns.

Its never been an issue before because a lady used to come to my house and wax everything I couldn't reach but she's retired now and I will be buggered if I'm getting anybody else its just to undignified .

And 20 years ago my mum convinced me they shaved you as well she also jibbed on with some rubbish about enimas frightoned the life out of me when I had the eldest sock returner COW.

zzzzz Fri 18-Oct-13 22:27:09

I fail to see what would be funny???

littlecloud Fri 18-Oct-13 22:31:55

I don't think there's anything wrong with a little tidy up with a mirror but not a necessity probably make things easier to see down there post labour for tears etc and stitching. I have always done and will again for this one. Not because I think the mw will laugh just because I usually do so makes even more sense when someone/multiple people are probably going to spend allot more time studying it than dh ever has!

IneedAsockamnesty Fri 18-Oct-13 22:32:01

OMG someone cut a chunk out of their labia

That must have been very painful

ethlinn Fri 18-Oct-13 22:33:21

I actually asked my midwife at my last appointment whether there are any requirements/standards of gardening before labour and she seemed very amused by this question itself (lovely lovely midwife!). She said absolutely not and it doesn't matter anyway. I ended up trying to shave and trim. I was extremely happy with the results until I actually had the baby and realised I hadn't seen/reached certain areas so I'd left beautiful odd hairy patches. No one cared.

blondefriend Fri 18-Oct-13 22:34:13

You're going to wee and poo on her!! She (or he) won't care about the hair.

Beastofburden Fri 18-Oct-13 22:34:38

You are giving birth, it is not a social occasion, you do not need to tidy up.

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Fri 18-Oct-13 22:37:20

Why can't you have a wax late in pregnancy? I had my last wax at 7 months last time but this time I would prefer to be 'neater' for my own reasons and not because I give a toss about midwives and obstetricians.

I peed all over my MW last time so I doubt a hairy fanjo would bother her much.

I agree that nobody cares.

On the other hand, lochia is gross enough without clagging up with hair. Get OH to trim with scissors to prevent postnatal gloop.

idiot55 Fri 18-Oct-13 22:39:18

Yip about the only thing i remeber my midwife saying as i ws getting. Bit shaved for Emergency section, was" oh you could do with a tidy up"

5madthings Fri 18-Oct-13 22:41:48

What horry said, no-one cares but I got my dp to give me a trim purely because it was easier with all the post birth bleeding.

AndHarry Fri 18-Oct-13 22:43:42

It wasn't the best. I've never been great at using mirrors to do stuff when I can't actually see my hands.

Not waxing too late in pregnancy is because it hurts like heck. So much so that the muscles in my ab/pelvic floor area sort of seized up, hence being rolled off the couch like a beached whale.

littleblackno Fri 18-Oct-13 22:44:56

I got my bits waxed before ds (very vain), the woman doing it (who i'd known for a while) said "is that ok?" I was like "I can't bloody see it you tell me!" It's totally not needed but made me feel better. For what it's worth beauty therapists won't care about waxing it for you either.
When i had dd i had horrible, huge varicous veins so went in all bushy. Noone will laugh, there are far more undignified things going on than your pubic hair!

IneedAsockamnesty Fri 18-Oct-13 22:48:27

I've never poo'd on a midwife before ( at least not as ar as i know)nor have I ever had an issue with dealing with lochia but then I do find I can only pee for awhile after birth if I pour a jug of water over myself so that helps

MsVestibule Fri 18-Oct-13 22:48:48

Somebody I knew got their mum to give them an ante-natal trim shock. They must be very close.

nouvellevag Fri 18-Oct-13 22:50:06

I don't normally shave anywhere, legs included, so my midwife got the full yeti experience. Didn't bat an eyelid, and if she was secretly giggling then I'd think the worse of her - I got the face to face (face to muff?) care and respect I needed from her and tbh by the time I met her, I didn't mind who saw what. We're not talking dignified procedure here. I mean, I read that it's quite common to shit yourself while pushing, so are untamed pubes really on anyone's radar?

nouvellevag Fri 18-Oct-13 22:51:00

Oh I missed page 2 and didn't realise we'd already covered the poo scenario.

TigerBabyyy Fri 18-Oct-13 22:51:55

I shaved completley two days before being induced.

Well actually dh shaves me, he did before dd, during pregnancy and does now 12 months after pregnancy.

I had a section so was thankful i had shaved, plus i was examined alot due to being induced and again it was a more pleasant experience knowing i was tidy etc.

I am fully able to shave myself, but i find it a big pain trying to shave down there.

Dh likes me shaved, so the deal is that if he wants me shaven, then he can do it !

Could your partner not shave you?

Rhubarbgarden Fri 18-Oct-13 23:03:58

Weirdly, I find myself horrified at the idea of dh shaving me, despite the fact I trim his ear hair. confused

MatryoshkaDoll Fri 18-Oct-13 23:09:00

A friend of mine is a midwife and she says she couldn't give a single shit about pubic hairstyles.

FortyDoorsToNowhere Fri 18-Oct-13 23:15:14

Just don't use immac ( spelling) I used it at 39 weeks and burnt down there.

Luckily I was induced at 42 weeks and had healed.

Goofymum Fri 18-Oct-13 23:19:13

Yes there's the poo scenario, also protruding piles when pushing, tearing. A nice tidy presentation may be your concern now but once the birth process starts it'll be the least of yours and your mid wife's concerns.

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