WORST customer care ever - Am I being unreasonable?

[dollybird1000]

Hello fellow MumsNetters,

I rarely post on her but I have experienced the most most outrageous customer care from a cafe. I'm still in disbelief.

Bear with me - its a long one -

Scenario:
So I regularly visited X cafe as lovely coffee/food and quiet ( so you'd think they would want to keep customers ) either just before I collect my 3yr daughter or after I drop her at nursery school.

So I would imagine I have spent at least £100 in there since the beginning of Term. Visting 2 to 3 times a week.

Yesterday I collected my daughter and 3 year olds being as they are .. as we got to the top of the road - near the cafe - she announced she needed a wee and was desperate.

I thought - no worries " quick we will just nip in my fav cafe and you can go and then maybe we will stay for a treat "

I went into the cafe and just happened to say " oo do you mind if she quickly nips to the toilet"

For the sake of clarity - I will be DD and the cafe BH:

The member of Staff I asked turned and said bluntly
BH: " No you have to be a customer"

DD: " But I am a customer , I come here regularly .. pls can she just go to the toilet shes desperate"

BH: " Well you will have to buy something then "

DD: " Are you serious ?"

BH: " Yes you have to buy something the toilet is only for customers now " again - NO sorry our any notion of understanding..

DD: " Are you telling me my 3 year old cannot use the toilet .. really ??.. I think your attitude is disgusting, I am shocked .. I am a customer.... er"

By the time I had to leave as my daughter HAD to go. I left saying

DD: " I want to speak to the manager"

BH: " Hes not here, he will be in the morning"

DD: " I am totally disgusted by your attitude and I will be back to complain"

BH : " you do that "

The staff was rude, blunt and totally got my back up - I was so so so angry on behalf of my daughter.

I had to take her out to wee on the street ( which is ok as Im not uptight about those things ) and would have just done that in the first place.

SO I went back this morning and spoke to the manager. I AM ASTOUNDED this place has ANY customers still- really-

me DD: " Hi , Im sure you have heard about an incident that happened yesterday regarding my daughter needing to use the toilet quickly - and the response I got and gave "

BH Manger : Bluntly " Its not a public toilet and yes I heard about it "

DD : shocked " um seriously you treat your cutomers like this ? Also this lady was quite rude in her mannner .. instead of saying " im really sorry my manager has told us strictly we cant allow non-current customers to use the toilet "

BH Manager : " well apparently YOU were rude and aggressive "

DD: " Yes I said the attitude was disgusting as I was furious , and your member of staffs manner was so abrasive "

BH Manager : " well its your word against hers "

DD: " I cant believe it, well you have definitely lost a customer "

Where upon the Manager just shrugged..


I am SO shocked. I have never in my life experienced such appalling attitudes towards customers or children.

If they had a sign up stating toilets for customers only OR if I kept going in after school and letting my daughter use the toilet and not buying anything OR if I had never been/use the cafe. Or if it was for me.. not a 3 year old.
I might ( might ) feel differently.

I am also very sad as I loved going there and was planning to take my mum there today to show how fab I thought it was.

I would also like to add - they only take cash , I had none on me but had planned to go to a cash point and return for a treat... although the staff did not know this.

I am posting on here for many reasons :

1. Am I going mad ? Was I wrong to think I could nip in for my daughter to use the toilet??
2. Has anyone else experienced this in cafes - and how did you feel ??

Comments / Replys Please .. !!

[pippitysqueakity]

Um...?

[SnookyPooky]

Again?

[TheCrumpetQueen]

Yanbu I own a cafe and I always let children use the toilets, especially if their parents are regulars!

[RevelsRoulette]

Seriously?

The last thread was deleted.

YABU

"Can my daughter use the toilet?"
"You have to be a customer"
"A cup of tea and an orange juice please"
"Toilets are over there"

You made a right fuss over nothing instead of doing the easy and logical thing of just ordering something! You could have nipped her to the loo while they were pouring.

[Mia4]

Serious grudge wank going on with this op

[Dobbiesmum]

You're joking right? You got told last time you were being U and frankly nasty enough to get the thread deleted. Putting an X where the café name was isn't going to get you much further!
Still U, still nasty.

[dollybird1000]

yes again as it was deleted as I named the cafe - which I shouldnt have.. maybe tell me your opinion rather than.. your ums.. and agains?

[PenelopePipPop]

YABU.

Rules of free stuff go:

1. Businesses never have to provide anything including access to toilets for free.

1. If they do provide something for free we say thank you and consider rewarding them with our business or recommending them to others.

1. If they do not we are gracious about it.

You do not see to understand rule 1, have broken rule 3 and are misapplying rule 2. I'm sure the business does not mind losing you as a customer.

[harticus]

Let it go OP.
Spend your money elsewhere.

[Mia4]

And yes yabu and v v u to repost again.

[ChaosTrulyReigns]

What?

Reposting without the cafe name only makes you sound marginally less .

[Anniegetyourgun]

She's taken the café's name and address out of the re-post so I expect they'll let the thread stay this time.

SIStillBU though.

[RevelsRoulette]

I did.

You made a fuss about nothing when it was so easily solved by simply replying to them with an order, instead of blustering about how you're a regular customer etc etc.

You weren't a customer that day until you placed an order.

Instead of just saying ok, I'll have a coffee, while you're pouring that I'll nip her to the loo - you did some weird Don't You Know Who I Am routine.

[NotShortImFunSized]

YABU

They have every right to say only customers can use the facilities. You were not a customer at the time you asked to use the toilet.

It seems you made a huge fuss over it and I can see why the staff member was like that in response.

Yes a lot of places will gladly let you if you ask but this is not one of those places.

[KirjavaTheCorpse]

It's fairly common in all the cafes/coffee shops in my area. You're expected to buy something to use their facilities. The manager was right, it isn't a public toilet.

Perhaps the lady was blunt, but really I don't see why you were furious if you were planning on staying for a treat anyway.

I'd have asked to use the toilet, and, when told I couldn't unless I was eating there, I'd have explained that I intended to do so but my toddler was bursting. I'd have probably given her my order and then took my child to the toilet without any further discussion.

[dollybird1000]

like I said they only take cash .. I had none at the time.. but thank you for a clear reply - I shall do this if ever in the same situation again..

I fail to see why its nasty @ Dobbiesmum ?

And I was working - so I didnt see any comments - hence why I reposted removing the name.

[pippitysqueakity]

Nope, don't need to put any more...but I will . You got all the answers on the last thread.
YABU, and not v polite.

[TheCrumpetQueen]

I can't believe people think the op is unreasonable

I can't imagine turning away a child (or pregnant woman) from using the facilities. How mean of the cafe.

[SnookyPooky]

YABU. How's that?
Get a grip and get out more.

[Lottiedoubtie]

Yabu 'ly boring.

[LeGavrOrf]

Smoke a doobie, OP.

[Fleta]

YABVU

1. They are running a business not a public toilet.

1. I have been in similar situation a pleasant "could I have a coffee and a piece of cake, here's the money- I'm just going to pop DD to the loo, I'll get my change and drinks when I come back"

1. I'm not surprised at the attitude given you were rude and made an enormous fuss. By the time you'd had the argument you could have ordered, paid and taken DD to the loo.

[Morgause]

YABU

[bsc]

YABU

[moondog]

The key is .....don't ask

I'm fucking furious myself as I am off work to wait in for a guy to come and fix a faulty (and v pricey) bed I bought. Did school run, pinned a note to door saying I would be back in 10 mons. and returned to message saying he cant find my house and I will have to rearrange.

I am speechless. I live in a village of about 10 houses in a house on its own that has the house name prominently displayed and which nonoe has eve had a problem finding. He claimed his satnav was broken, although he has apprarently driven 2 hours from major city to get here.

And no he can't do a uturn and come back as he is somewhere else but can't tell me for 'security reasons'

Wanker