to wonder if everyone elses children really did receive a perfect parents evening report (as posted on facebook)

(139 Posts)
grumpalumpgrumped Tue 15-Oct-13 21:58:47

Parents evening season and my news feed is full of 'well done little johnny a perfect parents evening'. AIBU to wonder if I'm the only one to get a good but not perfect report for my DS?

Feeling a bit fed up and dare I say it a little disappointed (DS report was not bad at all just honest and I can see what they were saying is about right)

Not sure why it bothers me, just trying to gauge if I'm a terrible mother!

CloverkissSparklecheeks Thu 17-Oct-13 13:51:25

I do share sporting/other achievements on FB but for some reason that seems ok. Neither of them are exceptional at sport so it doesn't feel weird to do so and other people seem to react in a lovely way to it. I did once at the start of my DS1s schooling put something on FB which did not go down well - I was very naive!

BruthasTortoise Thu 17-Oct-13 16:53:17

It does seem ok for some reason Clover, doesn't it? My kids are much more academic than sporty but I don't feel comfortable sharing their academics achievements incase I'm inadvertently making my friends feel bad. Don't feel the same about sports.

thebody Thu 17-Oct-13 16:59:52

oh good grief I just lie. my kids are both intellectual and sporting genius of course!!' ha bloody ha.

face book is full of crap. if you don't 'big up' your own kids then who will.

just lie like the rest of the parents out there.

Scatter: it isn't that it's friends succeeding. It's the fact that the only people who ever post this stuff on my FB feed are those whose children I know to be absolute horrors who are not doing really well. The ones who probably did get a 'perfect' report don't say anything. The main culprit is also the one that always posts about how wonderful her fiancé is etc. Their relationship is notoriously rocky!

Although it doesn't have me reaching for 'hide' as quickly as passive aggressive paranoia. You'd think the whole world was out to get some people.

exexpat Thu 17-Oct-13 17:05:18

The only one of my DCs' sporting achievements I have ever posted on FB was when DS came joint last in the whole-school cross-country race. Quite an achievement, that.

thebody Thu 17-Oct-13 17:45:58

exexpat grin

Arisbottle Thu 17-Oct-13 18:03:18

In that case arbitrary why not have a little compassion and understanding as to why they may be posting that parents evening was great.

Tbh my children cover the whole academic and sporting spectrum from perfectly behaved genius to can't be bothered and average. If they do something great I shout it from the rooftops. I wish my parents had bigger me up a little more.

CHJR Thu 17-Oct-13 18:10:24

It is very noticeable to me that the parents who boast the most are the ones who are insecure. Sometimes insecure about their children, but more often about themselves. Seriously, I'm not just spouting a cliche. Listen to them quietly and you'll notice... it's kind of sad.

CHJR Thu 17-Oct-13 18:14:15

As for FB, we have a firm rule against posting anything at all about our children now. The oldest is a teenager and he wants to be in control of his own public image and privacy. Quite right too.

Arisbottle: I have plenty of compassion for their personal situations. I was just noting the pattern among my FB friends. That said, the fact is that the loud FB protestations do not help them because it irritates people (which makes them less sympathetic). And, as others have pointed out, people don't necessarily know there's a problem (and that you might need help) if you are intent on pretending everything is wonderful to the world.

The passive-aggressive paranoid ones are scary and weird though. I have sympathy for them because I suspect there are serious mental health issues. But I can't help them and I don't really want to voyeuristically watch the train wreck. So I hide them and suggest to my stepdad (to whom they are related) that they might need a bit more support.

mrstigs Thu 17-Oct-13 19:32:00

I posted about ds's parents evening. He's had two really tough years in infant school, he really struggled socially although not academically. His behaviour was getting to the point where i was worried he'd disengage altogether. First term at the attached junior school and the teacher (who was well briefed before the start of term) was massively impressed. He is so far being fabulous and she said we should be proud of how hard he has tried to do his best. After two years of meetings with teachers that made me cry i was proud as hell and wanted to tell everyone! The people on my fb all know me and know how stressed I've been so it was natural to let them know that we've turned a corner. I do find some people take it too far though, and it seems to be the people where i know life aint as rosy as they make out. They put so much effort into maintaining this perfect virtual front it kind of makes me feel sad for them.

Trudyla Thu 17-Oct-13 19:36:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Trudyla Thu 17-Oct-13 19:37:52

Sorry, wrong thread. As you were!

Donkeyok Fri 18-Oct-13 06:24:07

grin give the baby gin! hahah

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