...to take time off work because of a bad ultrasound result?

[Nessalina]

So, let me start by saying, I am almost never off work, I'd say I've had 2 sick days in the last 3-4years.
We went on Friday for the 12 week scan for our first pregnancy, and unfortunately it looks like there's something very wrong. Baby has 9.3 NT and fluid in the chest. Doctor said that they don't see many babies with this sort of thing go to term We're back in tomorrow for tests to find out more.
Have spent most of the weekend in a daze, doing too much thinking and a lot of crying. Told my boss on Friday what had happened, as I was due in Saturday and wouldn't have been able to work, and I'd also need Monday off for tests. Which was fine.
The issue is, I don't see how I can go back to work on Tuesday. I'm an absolute mess right now, and I don't work in a job where I can just hide, I'm a manager and I'm in contact with staff and customers all day. My staff know I'm pregnant and I just can't face them not knowing what the hell is going on yet. The thought of going in and being normal just feels beyond me right now.
I want to sign myself off for the week, and take some time to get myself together, but I feel bad about my team managing without me, and it feels self indulgent, even though it feels like the right thing...
Sorry for the essay, just wanted to get some second opinions.

[5madthings]

Yanbu at all.

Nothing more to it, you need time to deal with this news and to look after yourself.


I am sorry you are dealing with this and hope you get more positive news on Monday xxx

[Tweasels]

Take the time off. They'll understand I'm sure and quite frankly fuck them if they don't.

hope your further tests are more positive xx

[Coupon]

YANBU. Sorry to hear what you're going through.

[thebody]

so sorry op how bloody awful for you.

I can't imagine anyone at work expecting you to turn up until things are straighter for you.

of course you must take time off. anyone would.

[Madmum24]

Take whatever time you need. I have been there, I know what you are going through x

[Sparklingbrook]

Absolutely NBU.

When you have found out more and can think straight, talk to work then, you have to prioritise yourself right now.

Hope the news is better tomorrow. x

[Lweji]

So, so sorry. :( Do take care of yourself.

I'm sure your team will be the first to tell you to stay at home.

[Mogz]

Yanbu, get your doctor to sign you off for a bit so you can collect yourself if that is what you feel you need. Your employer cannot legally pull you up because of pregnancy related absence.

[ZombieMonkeyButler]

Oh dear, I'm so sorry you're going through this .

YADNBU to need some time off. If this is a problem for your employer then I am sure your GP will be happy to provide a sick note, given the circumstances.

I also hope you have some more positive news tomorrow. They do make mistakes sometimes.

[Morloth]

Take the time. No question. You would insist one of your team did I assume.

Be kind to yourselves.

Sorry to hear your news.

[Nessalina]

Thanks so much all, I've been spending a lot of time in my head and I'd quite convinced myself that I was being a bit ridiculous to take time off. It's such a relief to hear that I'd be perfectly normal to do so.
I was worried that it'd not look good on my record, but good to know that if it's pregnancy related then it's different.
I think I'll ring HR direct tomorrow and let them know. My boss is on holiday herself and I'd rather not have to explain myself to someone just stepping in

[Nessalina]

That's a bloody good point actually, there's no way if expect someone on my team to come in if they were going through this.

[closingeveryhour]

So so sorry OP. Of course you must stay off. Thinking of you xx

[PistachioTruffle]

Yanbu

[TweaksCrunchyCarrot]

I took a week in the same circumstances. Totally necessary. Be kind to yourself.x

[RedorBlack]

Oh Op, I am so so sorry. YANBU at all, this isn't self indulgent at all, this is you doing what you need to do for yourself. Perfectly acceptable & understandable. Please take care of yourself

[mrsjay]

your work wouldn't expect you in take some time off sorry you are going through this

[DontAskIDontKnow]

YANBU. It is a truly shit thing to go through. I found going to work easier, but I sit in front of a computer all day and no one there knew I was pregnant, so no chance of badly timed questions.

Make sure you give yourself time to get your head round the situation. Sometimes if things move too quickly it can be more traumatic.

There are other boards on mumsnet etc for support. If you search for antenatal tests you should find them.

[Tailtwister]

I'm so very sorry.

I'm a line manager and I would expect someone in my team to take time off under similar circumstances. Of course everyone is different and if someone wanted to be at work I wouldn't stop them, but YANBU to take time off if that's what you feel best.

[OneUp]

Honestly take time off

[thistlelicker]

Take as much time as u feel u need! Your bound to be experiencing so many emotions right now and u don't need to justify them to anybody!

[iloveny001]

Absolutely take the time off.

[Shellywelly1973]

Im so sorry...

Take care if yourself. Put yourself first, work can wait.

Wishing you the very best of luck with the tests today. X

[Runwayqueen]

Please take off as much time as you need. I've had a scan that didn't show what we expected and immediately I took the time I needed.

Be kind to yourself op