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To be cross with people who think their bags and coats need a seat.(74 Posts)
Title says it all. I think it's the height of rudeness in a crowded train, bus, cinema, airport terminal etc, etc to keep your bags and coats on a chair when people are standing.
And then compound it by getting all huffy and flouncy when asked "Is this seat taken?"
I once asked a woman to kindly move her bag and she told me to sit elsewhere!
If I get on the train and it's fairly empty I will put bags on the seat. If it's starts to get busy I will then move them on the floor.
I once got on a bus and the man opposite kindly moved his feet off the seat for me and smiled like he was doing me a big favour .
I didn't sit on that part of the bench but chose the aisle seat that was free too. A woman got on at the next stop and wanted me to budge up.
I didn't want to sit where his shoes had been. I know you do that all the time but it's one thing to do it unknowingly and another to have to sit where someone has just had their shitty feet.
So I explained to her politely why I wouldn't move up and said she could sit there if she didn't mind and moved aside for her.
They both started having a go - her for me refusing to move up and and him for shopping him when he'd been so nice and polite to me
I get more annoyed by people who are so fat that they require two seats. I can't ask them to move their flesh.
So what do you suggest bonsoir? Anyone whose fat shouldn't travel on public transport?
How is that fair?
It is annoying, when people can clearly see that a bus or a train is filling up rapidly, and still make no effort to clear the seat beside them, and only do so, when asked, sometimes with a bit of huffing and so on. I would never go to sit where someone had left their bag if there were plenty of empty seats elsewhere. That is a bit silly, in my view.
I was on a train lately where seats were booked. A guy and his girlfriend got on, to find another couple sitting happily in their booked seats. They asked politely to sit there. The others moved with a lot of huffing and fussing, and as they left, the man said to the couple, SO ARE YOU HAPPY NOW! They politely said that they were. After all, they were sitting in the seats they had booked, why wouldn't they be happy.
I can't ask them to move their flesh
I'm sure you could Bonsoir. You just need to overcome your natural reticence towards insulting people.
Someone asked why ask for a bag to be moved when there are empty seats. I know when my usual commuter train is going to be full, I will beeline for the bag seats as I feel there may be less assertive people than me around!
I once suggested to a woman standing with three children that oh look, I can squeeze both my DDs on my lap, and you can sit there, and there, and put one child where that ladies' bag is. Bag lady was not happy but I'd watched her keep her bag there on a packed train opposite me while I already had one (admittedly small) DC on my lap, and then leave it there while people were standing in the aisle NEXT to her bag (teenagers too polite to ask her to move it initially but eventually one did when the aisle became so squashed he was practically falling on top her bag). Then when the teen got off, she put her bag back on the seat despite a crowd more people getting on!
You are all so polite,
If they have placed their bag on the inside, I would just say shove up then, and sit down, if the bag is on the outer seat, just sit on it, if people want to be silly when they can see that others want to sit down, don't enable their ridiculous behaviour.
Why would you sit on someone's stuff rather than ask them to move it? Do you generally like to damage people's property when it's in your way?
If you haven't yet asked them to move it then they have not yet been rude, they have merely been unobservant. If you sit on their stuff rather than ask for it to be moved then you are being rude.
I move bags when it's busy. I also move DD (nearly 4). I was on the tube coming back from my mum's the other day, rush hour was starting so I shifted DD onto my knee (with her and my rucksacks between my legs on the floor - it is doable). DD starts to moan that she wants her own seat, so I smartly said 'DD, when you've just done a hard day's work, you can have a seat to yourself. Until then, you can sit on my knee'. Everyone laughed. Kids spread all over seats instead of doubling up or even <gasp> giving up their seat for an adult
who's just done a hard day's work, possibly with hideous period pain and maybe a hangover as well piss me off just as much as bags.
I've been the collateral damage of seat-hogging Tube Rage
I was an innocent by-sitter when someone tore my tights by self-righteously barging in instead of behaving like a normal person and asking the person sitting opposite me to move her stuff.
They were Wolford ones.
I said something really quite forceful indeed to the silly cow. She was embarrassed but still didn't offer to pay for my fucking expensive tights - not that I asked. I'm far too classy for that.
It was over 10 years ago. I still bear a grudge and will carry it to my grave. Idiot.
A few years ago we had to take DD to GOSH for an appointment. The appointment time meant we had to get on a busy commuter train. We boarded and looked for seats. There were several throughout the coach that had bags on them. The people who owned the bags were all looking pointedly in the opposite direction.
I hoiked my sleeves up and marched up and down the carriage saying "Can you move that bag please, my DD/DS/I need to sit down, and then plonked a small child into the vacated seat. By the time I asked to sit down, three nice sensible business men had left their group of four seats, winked at me and swapped with us so we could sit together! DP just stood looking on in embarrassed horror!
ag hogging is just RUDE!
mrsoakenshield that's nice of you. I'm not piss-taking. I mean it.
But I remember being told to stand for adults - by teachers, not my lovely mum btw - and I don't think that's fair if the only reason is to be blindly respectful to your elders.
There are lots of school trips on my Tube journey. I don't mind standing if kids have got the seat first. I'm able to do it and they've paid just like me.
I don't care if it's a child fare; my mother has a Freedom Pass, should she stand because she's paid nothing? I can't turf an adult out of their seat so why should I do it to a child or a pensioner?
I've given my seat to small children because they get bashed about. Usually parents like you say thanks and sit the child on their knee.
Obviously I'd like anyone of any age to give a seat to someone who can't stand easily, and I'm really grateful if they include me in that category if I'm wearing stupid shoes that day
And I'm grateful to anyone who puts a kid on their knee or makes two of them share a seat or tells an excited child to choose between having a seat or rushing around to talk to their friends.
<<spread the love on the Tube >>
There were two on a crowded stratford train yesterday that took up 4 seats as they had their feet up on the seats opposite and small suitcases taking up the floor room trying to block off further 2 seats. The shelf above them was empty so plenty of room to put them out of the way.
Feet on seats gives me the rage far more than handbags.
And people who leave free newspapers behind on seats or behind your neck. It's not a lending library. Put them neatly on the floor but preferably take them with you and bin them.
I don't expect it because of the fare, that wouldn't occur to me, it's more that I can still remember the absolute bone-crushing tiredness that can come over you after even a normal day's work. When you hang on a strap thinking 'if I let go, I will fall down'. When you fall so fast asleep you miss your stop by 3 stations. That's when I wish parents/carers would very kindly
tell ask their charges to double up or get up. DD may have had a super-jolly day frolicking at Grandma's, but she is not that exhausted worker. She just isn't. She's stood on the tube as well, I certainly wouldn't expect anyone to give up their seat for her, she's got good balance and is fit and healthy, so there's no need. It's kind if people offer, of course, but certainly at going-home time, I think their need is greater than hers! (I don't sit and expect her to stand, I should point out!)
I have to admit that I had my feet on the opposite seat the other day.
I was coming home from London after an invasive medical procedure and was jolly uncomfortable. In my defence, I put my feet on my coat on the seat, no one was sitting next to the seat, and the coach was fairly empty.
I got the rage that day on the way into London when a teenager had his wet shoes directly on the opposite seat. It was a busy train and there were people standing. He was sitting right under the sign saying "No feet on seats" too!
I sound quite hypocritical posting this, but my feet were technically not "on" the seat!
That's lovely of you mrsoakenfield Much appreciated. I find most people to be really considerate on the Tube and I expect they are all over the place.
Mind you, outsiders do like to go on about how terrible London is, which it's not. I get quite pissed off by that because I'm nice and I meet nice people all the time.
My mother is very elderly and most people are fantastic and amazed and impressed that she's still travelling. It makes me quite choked about how kind people can be.
Yesterday a 20-something offered my mum a seat immediately but she declined because it we were only going one stop and it would have been difficult to manoeuvre into the seat and manoeuvre back out.
And to be honest, though she's an old bat, she didn't need it
We thanked the girl but she was a bit put out because she wanted to do the right thing. Never mind, her heart was in the right place.
There are dispensations saggy. Putting your feet on your coat would count in my book
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