to think this is very disruptive??

(972 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

macdoodle Sun 13-Oct-13 15:52:21

I probably am being unreasonable and am prepared to hear it.
My DD1 has just started secondary school, she is in the "more able class" (this is what its called by the school hmm).
In this class, of about 20 odd, there is a boy with SN. He has an assistant for every lesson, and from what my DD tells me I guess he must have some form of autism.
But every single day, she is coming home with stories of what "X" has done. Thinks like having tantrum, which takes 20mins to calm down disrupting the lesson, shouting at the teacher, grabbing or hitting another child (and once a teacher), throwing all his books and stuff on the floor (numerous occasions), storming out of lessons etc etc.
Now the kids all seem to think this is hysterical (and great fun that almost every lesson is disrupted by "X"), but every day I am a bit hmm, it just sounds very disruptive, and DD is starting to sound more annoyed than thinking its funny.
She does however say that is is clearly very bright indeed.
I know he has just as much right to be taught, but at the cost of disrupting a whole class of children? AIBU?? I can't quite decide TBH, and so far it doesnt appear to be affecting DD1's abilities, but we are only a term in.

coldwinter Sun 13-Oct-13 15:56:34

YANBU This is very disruptive, especially for secondary school were they really should be knuckling down to work.

PeepingTomcat Sun 13-Oct-13 15:57:13

So you're basically saying he should be excluded from the class for having autism?

coldwinter Sun 13-Oct-13 15:58:32

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

macdoodle Sun 13-Oct-13 16:01:40

Well I dont know peepingcat, if he didnt have SN (which I am supposing he must have), then clearly this kind of behaviour would not be tolerated at all.
On Friday he apparantly (though DD1 is not a liar, and no reason to, so am assuming its true), grabbed another boy on the collar and threw him on the floor.
DD1 says some helpers are better than others at controlling him, but sometimes half a lesson can be lost while he "plays up", or is taken out.
TBH I hear more about him than anything else.
There is actually a school for children with SN attached to this secondary school. Without knowing any details its hard to know what is appropriate, but surely my concern is for my DD1?

AlexaChelsea Sun 13-Oct-13 16:02:31

Teach your DD to work whilst ignoring disruption.

YABU

coldwinter shock DFO.

AlexaChelsea Sun 13-Oct-13 16:04:25

If he is the mainstream part of the school, then he has obviously been assessed by people more qualified than you and your DD as to his 'suitability' for your DD's class.

coldwinter Sun 13-Oct-13 16:04:36

The teacher presumably will be teaching the class? It is not simply a case of ignoring the disruption. It will be a case of getting less teaching.

macdoodle Sun 13-Oct-13 16:04:59

I have told her to ignore him, and clearly that is what they are all trying to do. Poor boy has no friends either sad
But sometimes both carer and teacher are engaged in calming him down or removing him (as he often wont go). So they are not being taught.
She is a bright, able, very sensible girl, and I have a lot of confidence in her ability to just get on with it. But this is Yr 7 so we possibly have a good few years to go.
I may talk to her form teacher at the first parent/teacher meeting.

Bowlersarm Sun 13-Oct-13 16:05:08

It would worry me OP, but I don't know what the answer is.

Alisvolatpropiis Sun 13-Oct-13 16:05:33

It's a class for very intelligent children. If he is in it, then he too is a very intelligent child. One who also happens to have autism.

The teacher and parents need to teach the other children how to work through disruption. It's a skill they will find invaluable as life goes on not just now.

macdoodle Sun 13-Oct-13 16:05:56

Alexa, yes but those assessing him will be looking at his needs, and not those of the other 20 children in his class?

CeliaFate Sun 13-Oct-13 16:06:03

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

macdoodle Sun 13-Oct-13 16:07:15

Yes, I agree, it is a useful skill to learn to ignore things that distract you, but first term in Yr 7, in a class of children who are under quite a lot of pressure to achieve?

PeepingTomcat Sun 13-Oct-13 16:07:27

Fucking hell. I am honestly aghast at your opinion of this poor boy who has an ILLNESS!

I'm hiding the thread now sad

AlexaChelsea Sun 13-Oct-13 16:07:31

I'm actually in tears of disgust and bewilderment.

God forbid your precious child have some lesson time disrupted because of an SN child.

Imagine other parents started complaining about your DD, asking that she be removed as she was a disruption? How would you feel?

coldwinter Sun 13-Oct-13 16:07:36

Alis - Are you expected to do a piece of work at employment while someone has a tantrum or hits someone else? And the OP's DD is getting less teaching time as a result. Yes he is intelligent, nobody is denying that. And he should be taught at a level to meet his intelligence. But the other children matter too.

AlexaChelsea Sun 13-Oct-13 16:09:30

Exactly. And if it is really affecting the other 19 children, then presumably the professionals will move him to a more suitable SN part of the school.

They haven't, and probably for good reason.

If it was really as bad as you are making out, they would have.

Strumpetron Sun 13-Oct-13 16:09:36

I don't even know what to say because on this forum all you'll get is people getting on their high horses because he has special needs. He has the right to an education just as anyone else has, but sitting in this classroom is obviously not the right learning environment for him. He isn't learning, the other kids aren't learning so I would be very worried and I'd question why the teachers are failing the child with SN and the others.

macdoodle Sun 13-Oct-13 16:09:37

FWIW said pressure comes from school not me (though I expect my DD1 to achieve her potential). They have been told from day 1 that they are expected to achieve and perform to keep their place in this class. A lot for 11/12 yr olds, and then to have this constant distraction/disturbance...
And I get monosyllables about almost everything else but long tales of what X did today. They are fascinated what he gets away with, especially the hitting a teacher one!

macdoodle Sun 13-Oct-13 16:11:37

If my DD1 was as disruptive as this seems to be, I would most certainly be taking steps to address it. Are you saying the other children (including my "precious" DD1) are LESS important that this boy BECAUSE he has a disability?

CrohnicallyLurking Sun 13-Oct-13 16:11:51

It sounds like, for whatever reason, the boy's needs are not being met either. Otherwise he wouldn't be having a meltdown so frequently. Hopefully it is just a temporary blip while he settles in to a new school (remember children with autism often find change very hard to deal with) but if it is ongoing then YANBU to hope that they find some way to reduce the disruption- both for your DD's sake, and the boy's sake.

Jesus, my DS has AS and had TA support in a mainstream class, I suppose people talked about him like this. sad
YABU, your DD won't be as 'disrupted'by this boys disability as his life is!

Alisvolatpropiis Sun 13-Oct-13 16:12:02

coldwinter

I have worked with people who have Austin or other disabilities. And yes I was capable of and expected to carry on working if there was any issue.

Next question?

AlexaChelsea Sun 13-Oct-13 16:12:19

The people advocating the SN boy be moved/dealt with are obviously not people with any personal experience of SN. You are lucky, but fucking hell are you rude.

And if you do, god help them.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now