to kick DH in the nuts and pretend it's an accident??

(35 Posts)
FattyMcSaggyChops Mon 30-Sep-13 23:09:37

DH is obsessive about hanging washing out. I hate doing it at this time of year due to spiders. Yesterday's load actually brought in TWO spiders.

Anyway he insists on hanging the towels out today but when he brought them in he put them on our bed before folding. I said there will be spiders in our bed now.

me to bed 20 minutes ago and after checking under duvet and all pillows decided it was safe. Every few minutes he sneakily tickles me to pretend it's a spider. Everytime I hit the roof.

Next time I can hit him in nuts and say it was an accident, right??

HildaOgden Mon 30-Sep-13 23:11:15

No.Just tell him to grow up and stop being an irritating prick.

nennypops Mon 30-Sep-13 23:11:31

Yes. Fully justified.

BlissfullyIgnorant Mon 30-Sep-13 23:12:31

Do it. Then tell him to grow up, etc.

FattyMcSaggyChops Mon 30-Sep-13 23:14:56

I swear if I see/feel an actual spider tonight DH will be out on his ear tomorrow...after I've kicked him in the nuts! smile

BlackeyedSusan Mon 30-Sep-13 23:21:29

thrashing about in terror is the way to go...

ShakeAndVac Mon 30-Sep-13 23:29:19

Fully justified, tell him to grow up, irritating prick? Really? I get you're phobic of spiders, fair enough (you must be to refuse to hang your washing out on the off chance you bring a spider in, that's seriously phobic) but that's a bit harsh!
You know it's your DH with his tickly fingers, OK. he's annoying but some replies are a bit OTT!

WahIzzit Mon 30-Sep-13 23:35:45

Yes very irritating!

I still hang the washing out but give the clothes a good ol shake like a maniac after taking each item off the line. Worked so far.

Oh I am reminded of the time I found a whopper of a spider in my bed and I screamed at the top of my lungs. Dh came bounding up the stairs in a total panic. He assumed I'd come face to face with an intruder or something hmm I had but not the human sort!

Sindarella Mon 30-Sep-13 23:36:35

I too will not hang the washing out / pick stuff up ie towels left on bathroom floor for fear of spiders in this season. I know im pathetic, even had special hypnosis stuff but im still a wimp grin

I say LTB!!! grin

Sindarella Mon 30-Sep-13 23:36:35

I too will not hang the washing out / pick stuff up ie towels left on bathroom floor for fear of spiders in this season. I know im pathetic, even had special hypnosis stuff but im still a wimp grin

I say LTB!!! grin

CoffeeTea103 Mon 30-Sep-13 23:53:01

ShakeAndVac, I agree some of these replies are so ott. Think these posters just hate men.

DaleyBump Tue 01-Oct-13 00:14:13

<hands the posters who don't understand sarcasm a grip>

CrohnicallyLurking Tue 01-Oct-13 07:19:23

ShakeAndVac- I take it you don't have a phobia of anything? I do (not of spiders though). It's a primitive, unreasonable reaction. So even though you know that it's your DH pretending, the phobic part of your brain still goes 'aaahhhh! Panic!', your heart skips a beat and your hands go sweaty. Not nice when someone is repeatedly doing it just because it amuses them.

wonderingsoul Tue 01-Oct-13 07:36:22

not the same thing but my exh did some thing simler and i wish i had kicked him where it hurt.

we had just watched the grudge, i can only watch horros with some one and this freaked me out.
i also have to add that my bigest fear is going insane and he knew this.

any way we where almost asleep that nioght when he started making the noise, arrr like girl. i told him to stop ..he caried on but was pretending to be asleep. even if i nudged him etc. he "wake up" and tell me i was being silly. that it wasnt him and get angry at me for waking him him.

after 30 m ins of this i was starting to question myself, was i hearing it.. he kept on till i got out bed and started crying on the sofa.

i know it sounds silly but when some one starts doing stuff that your scared off you cant help how you react.

so no.. i hope you did kick him in the balls

headlesslambrini Tue 01-Oct-13 07:41:40

only if you kick him so hard he coughs them up. You can then add some hooks and wear them as earrings grin

nennypops Tue 01-Oct-13 07:47:18

There's always one humourless type on these threads, isn't there? Or in this case two. Hi, ShakeAndVac and CoffeeTea!

BlackeyedSusan Tue 01-Oct-13 07:58:07

there is aa dead body in my kitchen. I have been stepping over it since yesterday. I m going to have to get a smal;l boy to help me unpck the shopping now.

Sindarella Tue 01-Oct-13 08:27:25

Blackeyed, a dead body!? Thats a bit extreme, could have just done what op suggested an kicked him in the nuts grin

WahIzzit Tue 01-Oct-13 21:59:15

Oh fuck. What do I do. Have the washing hanging outside which I didn't get a chance to bring in before dark as we were out. On returning home I asked d h to bring the clothes in, I was busy getting dc ready for bed. He said ok but sat there, he normally does it before heading upstairs to bed.

Anyway since then we have had a row over something rather trivial (stressful day and I am so so fed up), and the tosser has gone off upstairs and I know he wont bring the washing in out of spite. (Had to be my fuckin clothes). I decided I should fetch them myself but the bloody garden lights not working and I cant see, and am rather fearful of the dreaded garden spiders.

Argh!

quoteunquote Tue 01-Oct-13 23:31:26
SugarHut Tue 01-Oct-13 23:37:18

Spiders are hideous. Take a torch and do your best. Then...if it was me, I would call him with a massive tone of urgency.. "DH!!!!!....DH...quickly!!!!!" When he runs in, be prepared standing holding a brolly. Ask him to kneel, and dub him "Sir Twatweevil of Spiderdom" Say nothing else and walk off.

But then I do have a weird sense of humour.

FattyMcSaggyChops Wed 02-Oct-13 06:38:47

I was never scared of spiders, could catch them on my own. Then one day I was staying away in a (actually very clean and lovely) b&b for work. I was sleeping but dreaming a spider was on my face. Woke up to see an actual spider walking across the pillow away from me!

is is where the fear began. I'm ok still. catching them although it's a bit comedic but the thought of one being in bed does terrify me.

I did not kick DH in the nuts but when he came in for a cuddle I elbowed him in the ribs. smile

ThePerfectFather Wed 02-Oct-13 10:11:16

Follow up question - my wife keeps doing the same thing, would I be justified in punching her hard in the tits? Hard enough that it hurts for like 30 minutes?

FattyMcSaggyChops Wed 02-Oct-13 14:54:12

Yes completely justified hmm

TheBigJessie Wed 02-Oct-13 15:24:18

I would not consciously decide it was justifiable to use physical violence. Deliberate violence is not justifiable.

However, I think that if someone keeps stimulating fear in someone else, and the victim reflexively fights back (you know, the fight or flee response), the git will bloody deserve the bruising.

I also think that anyone who is making someone scared and upset repeatedly, is being Very Nasty Indeed.

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