New car decision- we disagree

(65 Posts)
Pinkpinot Thu 19-Sep-13 21:47:35

Dh doesn't drive. And is probably in the car for 2/3 long journeys a year
I do about 10-12k miles per year.
Who gets to decide what car we get?

MrsMook Sat 21-Sep-13 12:09:25

I get a veto on DH's car as I'm an occasional driver, and will take turns on long journeys. The critical thing is that I have a comfortable driving position as being small, some large cars are not well designed for a petite driver with things like blind spots. I sat in one car in a showroom and said no immediately as the windows were so I high felt claustrophobic. As a passenger my demands are slight. The only thing I'm really against is sports style seats as my chest isn't broad enough so my arms kind of crush in on me. It still leaves a broad choice of cars for him, and he'll tend to decide on costs and efficiency. We tend to go for the same colours grin

My car is a mid-size so that gives him few comfort issues, so once I'm comfortable, the choice is again about value, and there's not much grounds for him to veto. Again, he's an occasional driver. We tend to use mine more to avoid shifting car seats and prams, but his extra boot space is handy on occasion.

The car needs to be comfortable for the drivers, for size and positioning. It's rare for an adult partner to need to sit in the back. (Bagsy me to be the only one small enough to contort between two car seats hmm)

lljkk Sat 21-Sep-13 09:58:24

And costs of parts omg, the frigging repairs. Any repairs on our diesel Kia cost a bomb.

nokidshere Sat 21-Sep-13 09:44:51

We bought a new car recently . I already have a seat Alhambra for work so the new one is essentially DH's for work and our family car. I am 5ft2 and DH is 6ft6 and our two boys at 12 & 14 are 5ft5 and 6ft respectively.

I do the research - cost, value for money, running and maintenance costs, and safety.

Then I choose what we are going to look at

We all go for test drives because both adults need to drive it and both boys need to fit behind the driver

Then we all choose which one we like best

Then I decide which one we are having grin

Because if you do it in the right way everyone feels that we made a joint decision. Even though I had already decided which one we were going to get before we started the process

SirChenjin Sat 21-Sep-13 09:28:39

My DH is 6'1", 17 stone and drives a (new) Fiesta. Manages to fit in there absolutely fine!

lljkk Sat 21-Sep-13 09:27:10

Weird, my dad is about* 6'3" and 16-18 stone. He fits fine in my Fiat 500. He doesn't fit in a Smart car, though. smile

*Dad used to be 6'4", but he's 71yo now so probably shrunk a bit.

Get a copy of What Car? and compare the running costs, OP, or look at Honest John. Anything like an SUV will be so expensive to run.

Pinkpinot Sat 21-Sep-13 09:10:17

I've driven them, he's sat in them!
We have one small child
He rarely gets in this car, we occasionally go to friends 20mins away
Rarely any other adult passengers as well as him.
I do long distance motorway driving to my parents, he doesn't come
I only ever have one other small child in the back.
My older niece can sit in the front

Hulababy Sat 21-Sep-13 07:55:49

You say DH won't need to go in the back? Do you not have other adult passengers? What about growing children?

Hulababy Sat 21-Sep-13 07:53:19

Not been in an A5. I did used to have an a4 cabriolet though. You suggested it was similar size to an a4. Well we found the a4 cab a bit compromised in space tbh especially in the back. Was a lovely car but not very practical for a family car I guess. But it really does depend on what size an a5 is.

Have you been for a test drive along with DH?

Pinkpinot Fri 20-Sep-13 15:28:19

But we've both already chosen stunt girl!
It's not a dealbreaker, if I insist he'll say yes, get the A5, and really I'm happy with the A6
We are not actually rowing about it

He's not banned cumfy, he needs to take driving tests, and I just know he'll never get round to it. It's been 2 years
And even if he could drive, he wouldn't ever do the driving I do. He rarely goes anywhere at the weekend and works long hours during the week

cumfy Fri 20-Sep-13 15:07:25

But won't his ban expire fairly soon and you won't be the sole driver ?

StuntGirl Fri 20-Sep-13 13:41:07

Why don't you both look for an entirely different car that isn't the one either of you have chosen here?

I think YAbothBU tbh, so look for another compromise!

Pinkpinot Fri 20-Sep-13 13:24:12

He's never going to need to sit in the back

And I didn't really ask for opinions on my choice of car, thanks!!

Anyway, I don't think we'll be getting it any time soon, so I guess we have time to discuss

WMittens Fri 20-Sep-13 13:15:08

*It's a sportier model of the A4. He thinks the A4 is too small for him.
It's still a family car.*

It has a coupe roofline so if at any time he needs to sit in the back then he's going to be squashed; in the front he should be OK, but I would pity anyone who sits behind him.

And this:

AKAK81
YABU for wanting to spend so much on such a bland euro box.

Andro Fri 20-Sep-13 12:57:15

X-post. Why get a car do don't want though? Especially if you're the main driver. I think you need to look as some other options tbh.

Andro Fri 20-Sep-13 12:55:43

He moans when he gets in the A6, makes a big fuss about putting the seat all the way back

I now fail to understand why he wants another one then!

If you don't like the Q5 (and I don't blame you) then I'm sure he understands that your 'dislike/discomfort' is as valid as his...

Pinkpinot Fri 20-Sep-13 12:54:25

It's not like I'd be uncomfortable in the A6

Pinkpinot Fri 20-Sep-13 12:53:06

I have loved my A6
I love the drive of the A5 and a new A6
I wasn't comfortable in the Q5, I only have one small child, it seems a bit OTT
McNewpants, I realise how ungrateful I might sound
I know how fortunate we are to be having this problem
Andro, dh is a bit of a moan, maybe he'd be uncomfortable in any car
He moans when he gets in the A6, makes a big fuss about putting the seat all the way back

Potterer Fri 20-Sep-13 12:44:43

Pinkpinot my DH is also 6'3" rugby player built and he drives his own car, but he also drives mine too.

He does get a say in the choice of my car but it is because he bloody drives it at least once a week. He enjoys driving, I don't have any love of it so he drives mine as it is better than his little run-a-round.

I would never dictate what car he drove as I never drive it nor really go in it. My car is the family car, has to be big enough for luggage for holidays, taking to boys to school etc.

Honestly, 6'3" isn't that tall, however DH is tall in the body not the legs really so most cars he actually jams his head on the roof of the car. Now that is uncomfortable, but he can easily fit in a mini grin

Oh, and I am also a SAHM.

Andro Fri 20-Sep-13 12:39:46

^My reference to the A4's there is because of the similarity in their size to the A5.

BIWI Fri 20-Sep-13 12:38:59

If you're the main driver, I would say you have more influence on your choice. But to choose something that your DH feels uncomfortable in? Big no. YABU I'm afraid.

Andro Fri 20-Sep-13 12:37:48

The only difference is that DH feels a bit more squashed

Hmm...I have a 6ft 4, rugby playing OH (plays 6 or 8 in rugby union so has a pretty muscular build) who was perfectly comfortable in the two A4 I've had over the years.

What do you think of the handling of the A6? I didn't like it at all when I test drove one.

It sounds to me as though you're both after different things and have different priorities, maybe you need to look at some different makes of car and find a compromise?

I do think the principle driver's comfort (including how easy they find the car to drive) has to be a high priority.

Beastofburden Fri 20-Sep-13 12:35:33

true pink- can you tell i dont know a lot about cars?

hermioneweasley Fri 20-Sep-13 12:34:27

Have you discussed the option of getting the one you want and then hiring a car for the few long journeys?

I can't see the A5 being a problem though - it's hardly a smart car!

I have a similar sized car to the Q5 and I love the high driving position, but am often borrowing DW's smaller car as it's much easier to park!

MortifiedAdams Fri 20-Sep-13 12:32:46

Oh and we went for a Ford Focus. Total parent/suburbs type car because that wss what was best for the family. Both in practicality and cost.

The a5 is a boring car for a middle aged man with a bowler hat, you know. <sigh>

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