To ask for the child benefit to be split?

(59 Posts)
marieclare168 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:02:10

Please be gentle with me as this is my first post.

My husband was married previously and has 2 teenagers. He has joint residency and therefore receives child benefit for one of them (their mother gets CB for the other - this arrangement was put in place when they split 8+ years ago).

We now also have 2yo DS together and I have my own CB claim for him. My payments for DS are at the 2nd child rate. DH receives payments at 1st child rate for stepson.

It just occurred to me that this seems unfair and that we really should be pooling the total we both receive from CB and splitting it 50/50 between the 2 children.

Husband cannot see my point of view at all and says it's never going to happen. He says I would be taking money off stepson if we split the funds as his award is for his specific child and my award is separate. My thought is, if my claim were genuinely separate I would be receiving the full amount for our DS but clearly the CB treat us as a household and theoretically assume the 1st/2nd/subsequent amounts are pooled in any household and shared for the benefit of the children.

gordyslovesheep Mon 16-Sep-13 22:04:33

honestly - I think it's a massive fuss to make over a few quid - and it makes you seem a bit negative towards his son - sorry

DameDeepRedBetty Mon 16-Sep-13 22:04:36

I do see your point. Would anyone who works in the bit of the civil service that processes these awards care to explain how it works?

Hegsy Mon 16-Sep-13 22:04:40

How do you split other household finances does your DH give his son the CB or does it go to living costs etc?

Debs75 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:09:49

So you are arguing about £3.50 per week. Is that really worth arguing about?

littlemisssarcastic Mon 16-Sep-13 22:10:24

I wouldn't be making a stand over an extra £3.45 a week.
Does this go deeper OP?

bearleftmonkeyright Mon 16-Sep-13 22:11:27

This is a big can of wriggly worms to open. Why would you? This is the way it is, fair or unfair. I think yabu.

hermioneweasley Mon 16-Sep-13 22:11:46

Do you give the CB to the kids? If not, isn't it all just in the household pot?

(dreads now unlocking a can of worms about controlling/abusive/arseholey financial arrangements)

mehimandthegirls Mon 16-Sep-13 22:11:59

Yep I see your point. They are both DH kids so the money should be pooled. Why would his DSS lose out on money? does Dh give it to him directly?

Our CB gets swallowed up with bills ect....

maddymoo25 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:12:58

I m confused to as why its split anyway, are all your finances split ? X

littlemisssarcastic Mon 16-Sep-13 22:13:32

Also, if you are pooling your finances in the first place, this shouldn't be an issue. Perhaps you should be more concerned with why you are so bothered by this in the first place?

What extra could your child get with another £3.45 a week that he doesn't currently receive?

Unexpected Mon 16-Sep-13 22:14:13

What rate does his ex-partner get for their other child, given that they have two children together, surely she only gets second child rate for the child who lives with her? I'm also not sure what you mean about pooling the total and splitting it - do you have completely separate financial arrangements? Surely the money just goes into a central pot and is spent as needed on stuff for both children or for the family in general?

AmyFlower Mon 16-Sep-13 22:14:24

That depends...were you the OW?

Debs75 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:14:56

So he has joint residency? Does that mean he has one of his kids live with you or he has both live with you some of the time?

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 22:16:41

Pool your finances or keep them separate, it's up to you. But as mentioned, a few quid a week isn't worth arguing about under normal circumstances.

maddymoo25 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:16:49

I don't understand so does that mean the teen children get 20 each cb to diff houses x

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 22:17:44

What has being the OW got to do with anything?

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 22:19:14

And, to be fair, the difference in CB should be split 3 ways with his ex. Then everybody gets the same.

AmyFlower Mon 16-Sep-13 22:22:35

If you were the OW then you should be ashamed of yourself.

Moxiegirl Mon 16-Sep-13 22:22:55

I get chb for 2 children, dp for 3! It all goes into the same account and gets spent on household outgoings. It wouldn't occur to me to quibble.

gobbynorthernbird Mon 16-Sep-13 22:24:54

Oh do be quiet, Amy.

Fairy1303 Mon 16-Sep-13 22:25:18

Absolutely ridiculous and irrelevant to be asking OP whether she was the OW - a a step mum I actually find that assumption quite offensive tbh.

Agree that I don't think you should quibble a few quid. I get 2nd child rate fr DS and DH gets the £20 for DSD, it's never crossed my mind that it should be an issue, since it all gets pooled anyway.

WilsonFrickett Mon 16-Sep-13 22:25:49

I do get what you mean - if you had two DCs of your own, you wouldn't say 'DC1 gets this and dc2 gets that' you'd just pool the two amounts and just sort of absorb them in to household life.

For example If you were well enough off to be able to save the cb, I can't see that you'd save less for dc2 just because they were the second one, you'd split the difference and save the same amount for each child.

But I really can't say if YABU because it depends so much on how your household works.

BrokenSunglasses Mon 16-Sep-13 22:26:36

YABU.

What are you planning on doing with the extra few pounds each month anyway?

AmyFlower Mon 16-Sep-13 22:26:58

grin

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