14 wks pregnant and going for a job interview(211 Posts)
I'm 14 wks pregnant and I've been looking for a job for awhile.
I didnt know I was pregnant when I applied for the job - back in June. (They took ages to shortlist for the interview!)
Its the job that I'd like to do and its part time which would suit me. They're looking for a few different posts, permanent and temporary positions. Ideally I would like a permanent post so I can come back to the post after I have the baby.
Am I being unreasonable to go for a job interview at this stage of my pregnancy? I started to show my bump (well for me it looks big already...my second baby) and worried how to cover my bump at the interview...
I also feel sad to feel that I have to hide my bump when I should be happy with my pregnancy..
That's true, bbcessex, and I didn't say maternity leave costs employers nothing. I certainly think there is an argument that the full costs of maternity leave should come out of taxation. There are policy arguments in favour of paid maternity leave that have nothing to do with discrimination - for example, the economic benefits of keeping women in the workplace. If the economy benefits from the policy, that's a good reason why everyone, not just the individual employer, should take the hit.
dontyouknow, I agree that morals are different from the legal position. Personally, if I was applying for a job in a local authority and I thought I would be a good person to do the job on a permanent basis, I would have no qualms about not mentioning the pregnancy at interview. Like the OP, I would mention it at the offer stage. I would have more qualms about it if I were going for a temporary position, or if the job required specialised input that would be difficult to replace at a particular time. I have turned down (unpaid but useful in career terms) positions on committees etc for that reason.
mrslion I think your experience is the reality of the situation really. I think the deceit is a factor. If you can work in that atnosphere, that's OK, but not all can. I couldn't.
Fitzgerald, if you really need a job now, then I think you are less likely to get one if you mention the pregnancy (assuming you have no obvious bump - if you do, it might mention itself!). Doesn't that in fact provide an answer to your question?
I think it's the reality too- and in hindsight I was very naive in thinking they would be ok with it.
I am very surprised by the stories on here of similar situations that worked out well for the pregnant woman.
Third child. Lost my last job when I was 9 weeks pg. it was well paid, those reserves are running out. I have quite a bump (3rd child!) but could prob conceal under loose black frock. I went back to work 6 weeks after DS1. Good in some ways not in others (good for my sanity, but DS found hard I think, but was necessary).
May just have to come clean as when I go for a job I assume it is for the duration. Looks like unemployment beckons, with no access to benefits from next month, an NRP who has stopped paying CM and a partner who will be expected to financially support my two DC. Single parent to graspy gold digger. I just wanted to pay my way.
I think most employers would be pretty pissed off tbh. It maddens and saddens me this is the case.
If you want to be certain of not being discriminated against then I would withold info of your pregnancy. As and when you get the offer (in writing) you can inform them then, and as you say, if you plan a quick return to work, you will build up credibility and all will be fine
I'm not knocking you for doing it; if I had to get income coming in and was in your situation then I'd do the same, especially if it was a specialist role where I was particularly qualified and I planned on taking as little time off as possible.
"I feel for you Fitzgerald, not an easy situation."
"I think the deceit is a factor. If you can work in that atmosphere, that's OK, but not all can. I couldn't."
Women in this position don't need your feelings. They need money. Most of us work for a reason. This thread has been filled with discussion about 'being the right person for the job' and finding the job of my dreams.... Realistically, most of us work because we have to, in jobs we may or may not care for. And most employers are looking for an adequately qualified person, not a super stellar dream candidate.
Pregnant people need to work and get paid, just like everyone else.
And tolerating a bad atmosphere at work is a hell of a lot easier than bringing up a baby on benefits.
At the end of the day if we go down the route of women not being able to apply for jobs knowing they're pregnant you're relegating them to second class citizens unable to access the same levels of employment as men.
And that's discrimination.
So we don't do it.
Yes headsdown it's sh*t. I'm not saying it's right. What I am saying is I sympathise with what is a difficult situation, what's so wrong with that?
StuntGirl has nailed it.
From the debate raging here, this is a very difficult question.
To me, the question comes down to one of honesty and fairness.
The OP states: "Am I being unreasonable to go for a job interview at this stage of my pregnancy"
The answer to that is of course "no!" Go for the interview.
But then she says: "I also feel sad to feel that I have to hide my bump"
This then is the crux of the debate.
I am now torn between my natural empathy as a mother and my worries as a potential employer.
Indeed a very difficult AIBU.
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