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AIBU?

14 wks pregnant and going for a job interview

210 replies

aichi · 15/09/2013 12:05

I'm 14 wks pregnant and I've been looking for a job for awhile.
I didnt know I was pregnant when I applied for the job - back in June. (They took ages to shortlist for the interview!)

Its the job that I'd like to do and its part time which would suit me. They're looking for a few different posts, permanent and temporary positions. Ideally I would like a permanent post so I can come back to the post after I have the baby.

Am I being unreasonable to go for a job interview at this stage of my pregnancy? I started to show my bump (well for me it looks big already...my second baby) and worried how to cover my bump at the interview...
I also feel sad to feel that I have to hide my bump when I should be happy with my pregnancy..

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DoJo · 15/09/2013 12:21

YANBU - if you need a job then you have to find one. What are your other options?

TidyDancer · 15/09/2013 12:22

You will probably get conflicting responses on this.

I'm a bit of a fence sitter tbh. Legally I believe you're sound going for the job. It totally depends how impacting your maternity leave would be on the company though.

I don't see why you shouldn't interview though.

HopeS01 · 15/09/2013 12:23

Go for it :) I started a new job when I was 12 weeks pregnant and don't regret it at all (aside from losing the great maternity package I had with my old employer)
Think about the future, OP

TheVermiciousKnid · 15/09/2013 12:24

Go for it. Women should not be discriminated against becasue they are pregnant. Ask yourself what a man, whose partner is pregnant, would do in the same situation.

pizzaqueen · 15/09/2013 12:24

I got a graduate job five months pregnant. I just wore a loose shirt under a suit jacket but I have a flabby belly anyway. Go for it but under no circumstances mention you are pregnant or already have a child.

TidyDancer · 15/09/2013 12:34

TheVermiciousKind - that's not a fair comparison to make. It's the maternity leave aspect that would make me waver on this, not the actual pregnancy.

I'm not saying that the OP shouldn't apply (I think she should) but ML so soon after starting the job is sometimes difficult.

HorryIsUpduffed · 15/09/2013 12:37

You wouldn't qualify for maternity pay (SMP or enhanced) but you would for Maternity Allowance, and your other maternity benefits such as protected leave, time off for appointments, etc would still apply.

How is your current job? In most cases it would be safer and financially better to stay there. If you're miserable or unemployed that's different, obviously.

Will DC2 be final DC or are you planning more? Looking for jobs when you're able to say "I'm looking forward to a new challenge now that we've completed our family" does give a clear message to employers (unfortunately).

FrigginRexManningDay · 15/09/2013 12:45

There's no comparison with a man being discriminated for a biological function because it doesn't happen. Women are discriminated in the workplace for all sorts of 'reasons'. Go for the interview OP,your family status doesn't need to come into it.

HeadsDownThumbsUp · 15/09/2013 12:46

TheVermiciousKind - that's not a fair comparison to make. It's the maternity leave aspect that would make me waver on this, not the actual pregnancy.

It's an entirely fair comparison to make. There's no way of disconnecting the "maternity leave aspect" from the "actual pregnancy", since she obviously wouldn't be taking maternity leave otherwise. And yes, to withdraw from the interview would be yet another example of how having a family negatively impacts on womens' careers and not mens' since a man with a pregnant partner would not pull out of the interview.

thatstoast · 15/09/2013 12:48

You say you've been looking for a job for a while. Are you currently working? If you're out of work then you should go for the job. Even if you're currently working and you think this new job will be a better option for you then go for it. Do what's best for you.

TidyDancer · 15/09/2013 12:49

No, it really isn't. You can't compare maternity leave with paternity leave in terms of the length of time away from work.

As I said, I do think the OP should apply for the position and I certainly don't think she should be considered any differently from any other applicant, but there is more to consider when you know you will be taking any period of extended leave, be that for maternity purposes or otherwise.

marzipanned · 15/09/2013 12:51

Of course YANBU to go to the interview. But I would say it's U to then take the job, if offered, without letting them know.

DH just hired someone who did not let on that she was pregnant until she joined. She was hired (as she knew) for a specific project which will last two years; she now won't be there for one of the years. I realise that's a very specific example but I do think that women taking on new jobs when pregnant can, in certain circumstances, actually prejudice employers against hiring women again in future.

DoJo · 15/09/2013 12:54

Also, be sure not to tell them if at all possible (should be easy - they can't really ask) - they can only discriminate against you if they know so it makes it easier for them not to be in a position where their decision might be coloured by the knowledge of your pregnancy.

OwlinaTree · 15/09/2013 13:01

Oh that's really tricky! You are legally OK, AFAIK you don't have to tell your employer until about 17 weeks before you want to leave? I certainly don't think you need to say at 14 weeks unless their is a risk assessment that would need to be done. If you have no job you need to take the opportunity, especially if it's a dream job.

BUT, I'm sorry to say I think your colleages will be pretty annoyed, they will employ you and then almost immeadiately have to go through the process of readvertising to get a maternity cover, train you up then you will be leaving, with no guarantee of your return. Personally I would be uncomfortable with the lying by omission in the interview, if they ask you how you see the job developing in the next year, what are you going to say?

You should go for it, but be prepared for a not great reaction to your news. I know it's inequality in the workplace and discrimination, but unfortunately companies do the right thing legally, they can't legislatefor

OwlinaTree · 15/09/2013 13:03

(Sorry) they can't legislate for what others will think.

It's a tough one. If you do go for it, good luck, I do hope it works out well for you.

cuillereasoupe · 15/09/2013 13:05

Go for it. I got a new job when I was 4.5 months pregnant. If you're the best for the job now, you will be after ML too.

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 15/09/2013 13:06

The wouldn't tell them. You have no obligation to do so. If they think you will be right for the role, having children should not matter. A good employer will recognise that.

Teeb · 15/09/2013 13:08

Is that true though cuillerea?I mean, I know from friends/family and just reading these boards that obviously having a child can have a huge impact on your priorities and ambitions. I'm not saying it isn't true for some, but I don't believe it is a blanket statement that having a newborn baby doesn't change your approach to working life.

McNewPants2013 · 15/09/2013 13:08

Go for it, even if they offer a temp position rather than a perm

TheVermiciousKnid · 15/09/2013 13:12

How can women ever have equal opportunites in the workplace if they feel they can't apply for a job because they are pregnant?

OwlinaTree · 15/09/2013 13:21

You can apply for a job, but you have to be prepared for the fallout. Basically you are withholding information- legally- but that's going to have an impact on how you are viewed. Every example of this is going to be different of course, so only the op really knows what her situation is.

PresidentServalan · 15/09/2013 13:31

If you are going for the interview, be honest with them. It might actually work in your favour. Six months to a year is a long time to be away from an employers point of view - if you are the best person for the job, it gives them a chance to make arrangements for when you are off and it also shows that you are an honest person who wants the job and cares enough about it that you will work with them on this.

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PresidentServalan · 15/09/2013 13:33

And the other issue re sexism - if men were likely to take a year out, want to change their hours when they come back etc, then they would be treated the same.

HorryIsUpduffed · 15/09/2013 13:33

It's true, alas.

You can be in the right, but that isn't much consolation when they mysteriously don't keep you at the end of your probation period.

OwlinaTree · 15/09/2013 13:33

I would agree with president if they really want you then they will still employ you and you won't have all the uncomfortablness when you start.

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