Note: Please bear in mind that whilst this topic does canvass opinions, it is not a fight club. You may disagree with other posters but we do ask you please to stick to our Talk Guidelines and to be civil. We don't allow personal attacks or troll-hunting. Do please report any. Thanks, MNHQ.

To give dd2's present to dd1?

(176 Posts)
JessicaWakefield1 Mon 09-Sep-13 22:01:35

Dd2 is 2months old, along with being given numerous new clothes from well meaning friends and family she also has her older sister's hand me downs.
Dd1 is in desperate need of new autumn/winter type clothes. DH's aunty gave dd2 £100 in Next vouchers when she was born wibu to buy dd1 clothes with dd2's vouchers? It would help a lot tbh as we are struggling due to me being on maternity leave so couldn't really afford to use the vouchers on dd1 and just put the same value away for dd2.
We also need new bedding and some nice Next bed sheets would be lovely but that feels very wrong.

YANBU at all. You've said yourself, DD2 gets DD1's hand-me-downs, so will get them eventually anyway. And Next stuff wears really well, so will last to be passed on! If you want to assuage your guilt buy DD2 a small gift or item of clothes from the vouchers to show the aunt, and enjoy your new bedding!

aturtlenamedmack Mon 09-Sep-13 22:05:22

Erm I think if you replace them in the future it would be fine to buy the clothes with some of them.
I would make a point of buying them back though because your auntie intended them for your dd2 and so your dd2 should eventually benefit from them.

5madthings Mon 09-Sep-13 22:08:59

Yanbu at all, dd2 will still get to wear them.

mumofweeboys Mon 09-Sep-13 22:09:00

I spend vouchers on which of my boys need clothes. When my last bundle arrived we got we got a few different vouchers so brought each of the boys something. Its not like your baby will care. Next do good sale deals online to make the most of your vouchers

SavoyCabbage Mon 09-Sep-13 22:11:35

I would use it without another thought. She needs a coat. The baby doesn't need anything.

I would also use the voucher to buy sheets if you need sheets. It makes more sense to use the voucher than cash even if you has oodles of cash.

Having two daughters myself I feel quite sure that you are going to be spending 100 pounds on clothes for her in the future!

OxfordBags Mon 09-Sep-13 22:14:18

I think you're overthinking this. When we got some John Lewis vouchers for our DS when he was born, we bought a new kettle and hairdryer with them.

Famzilla Mon 09-Sep-13 22:16:10

I see no problem with buying DD1 clothes if you're struggling. However buying expensive new bed sheets doesn't sit well with me. It's not something I would do with my child's money unless I didn't have any functioning bed sheets at all.

McNewPants2013 Mon 09-Sep-13 22:18:44

I would, but replace the money when you could.

BrokenSunglasses Mon 09-Sep-13 22:21:19

I don't think there's anything at all wrong with you spending them on clothes for dd1, presumably they'd get passed on to dd2 anyway. Bedding for one of your children is fine too. But I think spending vouchers given to you for your baby on bedding for yourself is not very nice.

JessicaWakefield1 Mon 09-Sep-13 22:24:22

Thanks, I'm sure you're all right. I think I've got a bit of a complex when it comes to dd2 as financially we are not at all in the same place as two years ago when dd1 was born. Dd1 had all brand new, best of everything wherras dd2 has literally nothing new aside from gifts from friends and family.

I love the way you "need next bedding" grin sounds urgent grin

otherwise I'm in the same dilemma dd1 needs winter clothes; dd2 has vouchers but a wardrobe of clothes and toys. I can't decide what to do.

cancel my dig re next bedding I've re read your post and you didn't say that. sorry op. its time I went to sleep.

DragonMamma Mon 09-Sep-13 22:26:33

I would quite happily buy my other child some clothes with vouchers intended for the other one, if I was struggling.

I'd definitely not be wasting them on Next bedsheets if I was struggling though. You could easily get them cheaper elsewhere using your own money.

Necessities - yes. Unnecessarily expensive things - doesn't sit well with me, at all and it feels wrong because IMO, it is wrong.

CHJR Mon 09-Sep-13 22:30:01

Presumably the point of giving vouchers/cash is to let the recipient choose. For the record, I consider baby gifts are always gifts to the parents. But if it bothers you,when you write to thank, describe the beyoootiful clothes you bought and don't go into who will wear them first! Anyway the baby won't object to hand-me-downs for a while yet.

McNewPants2013 Mon 09-Sep-13 22:31:07

looking at the next site duvet covers start from £40 and sheets from £9 and i wouldn't be comfortable blowing 1/2 the budget when DD need clothes.

curlew Mon 09-Sep-13 22:33:59

How can you need new bedding? Does it wear out?

littleblackno Mon 09-Sep-13 22:39:15

DS had LOADS of stuff bought for him including some nice outfits from next, they were lovely but as he had so much stuff I took them back and bought myself some new tops. My reasoning was that he really didn;t need it, I really did, at the time and I bought breast feeding tops so he was benefiting from them. I really don't remember giving it that much thought or worrying about it, at the time though.

curlew... mine has. Our sheet has a hole in it. Am using it for Ad long as possible but one of these days it will be unusable.

op. Just buy the clothes that are needed. no drama. No guilt. dd2 won't give a flying fart will she? grin

JessicaWakefield1 Mon 09-Sep-13 22:43:22

I know, I would never really spend it on bedding it was just wishful (and selfish) thinking of all the lovely things I could buy for myself from next.
Curlew - yes it does wear out, does yours not!? I have a duvet cover damaged by a dryer, another with a bad stain and they're all faded and old.

Ireallymustbemad Mon 09-Sep-13 22:44:29

I'm surprised that so many people think this is fine. Can you not just buy dd1 some cheap Tesco/Asda clothes?

I think you should spend the vouchers on dd2 or wait until she needs things. If you're actually desperate then ok buy dd1 some stuff but it's definitely not on to buy yourself something. The voucher was given for the baby not for you.

Debs75 Mon 09-Sep-13 22:44:49

Clothes for DD1 YES.
Bedding for you NO.

The clothes will be passed down and you could get a lot for £100 and they will be needed.

The sheets, well no one really desperately needs new expensive sheets do they

Ireallymustbemad Mon 09-Sep-13 22:44:53

Sorry cross posted.

Floggingmolly Mon 09-Sep-13 22:48:18

It's fine. Both your children benefit this way, so it's even better really.

5madthings Mon 09-Sep-13 22:48:46

Of course bedding wears out, our old ones had holes in and the poppers broke and stains from a nose bleed.

The vouchers were given to you op, use them in the way that is best for your family.

Remember they will have an expirery date, I think its a year for next vouchers.

Your dd2 will be able to wear the clothes after dd1. Maybe get dd2 a nice outfit? What about bedroom stuff for dd2, they do nursery stuff don't they?

Seriously its fine

Does dd2 co-sleep...cos technically then the bedding is for her as well grin

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now