To request XP come to me for DS?

(54 Posts)

XP and I split up 18 months ago. He has always maintained contact with our DS,3 weekly.
He lives 40 miles away. Until recently I have been meeting him in a city which is halfway between our houses. He is banned from driving for drink driving, so he also has to rely on public transport.
His mother has been meeting me also, as a favour to him. She has a car.
XP has never given me a penny for our DS. I have told him that I cannot afford to come to this city and meet him, as I don't think it's fair as I get no maintenance from him. I have not reported him to CSA. I have asked him for money in the past and the excuses are "I'm between jobs" and "I'm on the dole" repeat ad nauseum.
His DM (Who enables him to forever be "Between jobs) has just sent me a very guilt-trippy text saying how she is going to take things further etc and that XP cannot afford to come get DS.
However XP can most certainly afford cans of Stella.
Am I being unreasonable or should I stick to my guns. XP and his DM will not hear of it that he should pay maintenance, as I claim tax credits hmm
By the way, he's 40.

Thanks everyone. I couldn't help but feel like a bitch when XMIL texted me, but I know I'm right. I'm sticking to my guns. It amazing how MNers are on the same page about stuff. thanks

CruCru Fri 30-Aug-13 13:02:11

This sort of site is useful if these sort of situations. Have you also contacted the CAB?

Redorwhitejusthaveboth Fri 30-Aug-13 13:14:04

Good response to their argument they don't need to pay as you are getting tax credits is ' you have a moral
Obligation to contribute financially towards your child's upbringing' ... Shuts my ex up every time wink

God knows how much they think tax credits is!!

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