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AIBU?

to think that health and safety training to carry a coffin is ridiculous?

24 replies

froken · 27/08/2013 18:19

My dear grandpa died last week, his funeral is next week.

Most of his children and grandchildren live in other parts of tge UK and in other parts of the world so most of us will be arriving tge day before tge funeral.

For family members to carry tge coffin they must go to the undertakers and have health and safety training. None of my grandpa's family can get there with time to spare to get health and safety trained.

It makes me so sad that stupid health and safety regulations are stopping a ancient tradition, it seems so natural to carry a dead loved one on their final journey.

Aibu to think that this is really stupid. My grandpa was not a big man, he's already dead so if he gets dropped ( unlikely) it's not going to do any extra harm and everyone who would carry him have lifted heavier sofas/cabinets/pianos whilst moving house.

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thebody · 27/08/2013 18:22

where are you? my dfil died at 22 stone and my teen dss and dh with uncles carried the coffin.

the funeral directors told then how to walk etc but that was sensible.

never heard if this. very surprised if its true to be honest.

Tee2072 · 27/08/2013 18:23

It's not the harm to your grandfather that worries them. It's the lawsuit if they throw their back out or drop it on a foot and break the foot etc.

It's the undertaker covering their backside.

Sorry your family won't be able to get to the training.

Sirzy · 27/08/2013 18:24

I can only assume they have had cases whereby people have dropped coffins and been injured.

Don't see why they need more than a couple of minutes before heading into church though.

mynameisslimshady · 27/08/2013 18:25

I have never heard if it either. Will they let them sign a disclaimer of some kind?

Sorry for your loss

ccsays · 27/08/2013 18:26

It doesn't really matter if they've carried heavier things, if they were to somehow injure themselves, the company would be liable for not giving them proper moving and handling training. It does seem a bit ott, but it's not the funeral director's fault.

MoominsYonisAreScary · 27/08/2013 18:27

Is it a new thing?

meditrina · 27/08/2013 18:27

Calling it "health and safety" is new (and I can see why it's unwelcome).

Ensuring pall bearers know how to lift, carry and manoeuvre is however standard and always has been. For they will be doing so in full view of the congregation, and it really does help if there have been the rudiments of instruction (and perhaps practice). Dropping a coffin makes a funeral memorable in the wrong sort of way.

Sirzy · 27/08/2013 18:28

And the method to carry a coffin is unlike moving anything else so what else they have carried is irrelevant really.

The only thing I have moved on my shoulder with 5 other people is a coffin!

StephenFrySaidSo · 27/08/2013 18:32

i'm sure the funeral director could get round this by getting anyone who wished to sign a waiver saying they are agreeing not to sue if any injury occurs whilst carrying it if they cant make the H&S training. could you ask them about that?

froken · 27/08/2013 18:33

We are in the UK, well I'm not bit the funeral will be.

I just hate the culture of blame and liability :(

Your much more likely to drop a baby and they don't do baby carrying training at hospital ( do they?)

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StephenFrySaidSo · 27/08/2013 18:34

although I can see that doesn't protect anyone else who is injured that hasn't signed a waiver (like another pall bearer or mourner standing nearby)

perplexedpirate · 27/08/2013 18:35

No-one who carried my Nan had this. How odd.
Although two of them did bump heads when they picked her up, but that's cos they're clumsy.

FIFIBEBE · 27/08/2013 18:36

My mum maintains her cousin Dorothea (the deceased) fell out of a wicker coffin because the grandchildren ( teenagers and early 20s -differing sizes) were not told how to carry her coffin properly. I have no idea if this is true or not but there were other witnesses and my mum although as mad as a box of frogs wouldn't really make this up.

pollyblue · 27/08/2013 18:41

froken I'd say you're considerably less likely to drop a baby, given it's size and weight and the way you would hold it. Balancing an adult, in a casket, on your shoulder is a completely different kettle of fish.

My dad is an undertaker and I don't know if his company would band it under 'health & safety training', but giving the people carrying the coffin a run through beforehand really is common sense.

thebody · 27/08/2013 18:46

carrying a coffin is tricky. I assume you would expect some advice.

calling it health and safety is silly really.

froken · 27/08/2013 18:48

I havn't dropped my baby but lots of my friends have ( dropped there baby not my baby)

Its reassuring to know it's common to have to have some sort of training, I hadn't thought about height. We will all be there and that is what matters. I think I'm letting my emotions get focused on a small issue when actually I'm angry that life has to end in death.

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KitCat26 · 27/08/2013 18:50

When DH did this the undertakers just gave them a quiet briefing outside the church before getting the coffin out of the car. Would that be acceptable?

specialsubject · 27/08/2013 18:56

I''ve never done this, but a team of people carrying a heavy object (and person plus coffin is heavy) need to work together and be in the right order of height. Otherwise someone strains themselves and can be off work a long time with wrenched shoulder/neck.

sympathies to you all.

froken · 27/08/2013 18:57

I think a quite briefing would be ideal.

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makemineabacardi · 27/08/2013 19:15

A disclaimer or waiver means very little in court, actually.

Blame insurers and ambulance-chasing lawyers, not health and safety. I work in the sector and its irritating when people dont know the difference.

waltzingmathilda · 27/08/2013 21:33

lets be honest about this , its just so not going to be good for anyone if someone stumbles/has a hernia/drops the coffin. Do you know how to pick something up in tandem with 4 or 6 others?

TBH perhaps those chosen to be pall bearers would like that quiet chat to do Grandad the service and dignity he deserves.

OnTheBottomWithAWomensWeekly · 27/08/2013 21:38

It probably has very little to do with liability and litigation, this pervasive idea that everyone sues for all kinds is just nonsense, it rarely happens, its fuelled by Daily Mail style paranoia rather than reality.
nobody wants a funeral, a solemn and important occasion, ruined by dropped coffins, injured pall bearers or anything like it. It sounds sensible to me.

BakeOLiteGirl · 27/08/2013 21:47

I remember an ex partner telling me about the time he and his mates carried a friend's coffin down the aisle. He said it was much harder than it looked and seemed really heavy. Also because they were differing heights they snaked their way down like a pissed conga sweating like mad because they thought the were going to drop him.

Perhaps this is what they are trying to avoid.

SunshineBossaNova · 27/08/2013 23:00

I'm sorry for your loss froken and hope the funeral goes well.

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