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To still not have given up my childhood dream?

(31 Posts)
darlingdaffodils Tue 27-Aug-13 12:13:48

From about the age of 5 my dream was to marry a farmer!

Seeing a muddy land rover or tractor probably does the same for me as Brad Pitt does for others.

I did have two plans - marry a farmer or become a nun. I think being a nun is more likely! I don't even live out in the country!

Everyone has weird childhood dreams though don't they?

Mumsyblouse Tue 27-Aug-13 12:21:53

Last I heard, the Young Farmer's Association social events was still a good way for more rural young people to meet up, although the people I knew that went to it had quite a racy time! All that fresh air...

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Tue 27-Aug-13 12:35:21

YABU. Why don't you just become a farmer yourself? confused

WafflyVersatile Tue 27-Aug-13 12:46:19

Maybe she can't afford to buy a farm, and has no skill or experience farming?

When I were a lass our local country paper used to carry pictures of wholesome-looking girls wearing nice jumpers with a line or two with their name, age and maybe a hobby, for no other reason than I can think other than to attract a husband.

Maybe you could try that? grin

darlingdaffodils Tue 27-Aug-13 12:46:48

I have heard that about Young Farmer's meetings too! I am not so young any more though.

Being a farmer was never my dream - never really thought about why! I guess I had an idealised view of feeding chickens, mucking out cows, baking, making jam, and generally being lovely and domesticated.

inkyfingers Tue 27-Aug-13 12:56:01

I can't bear the thought that once married that would be my life too forever. Same farm, same job, same old mowing and mucking out. Very rural, only friends other farmers talking mowing etc. sorry, I know it's your dream ...

WafflyVersatile Tue 27-Aug-13 13:05:10

but she will have a stone cottage she can't heat and all the cakes for coffee mornings getting fat on the failures and all the cute animals crowing for a feed at 5am and a lovely ruddy-cheeked husband too depressed about tesco to want sex

brightnearly Tue 27-Aug-13 13:16:50

Somewhere I heard that there is a dearth of women on the Shetland Islands and the Outer Hebrides...would sheep farming be of interest?

darlingdaffodils Tue 27-Aug-13 13:49:14

I don't know if I am just duller than normal people but same farm same job doesn't bother me. Now same office job day in day out with the gossip and drama would be a nightmare!

I like the cold and I like early mornings!

Hmmm Shetland Islands .....

squoosh Tue 27-Aug-13 14:12:03

OP are you married?

ChippingInNeedsSleepAndCoffee Tue 27-Aug-13 14:18:31

Squoosh - I hope not!!

Waffly grin

inky me either <shudder>

darlingdaffodils - I am all for following your dreams, but you have to ... you know... follow them! You can't just expect a farmer to appear in suburbia begging you to marry him grin I've no idea where you live, what you do for work or anything else - but you need to get yourself out in the country, meeting - you know - farmers! and socialising. There are various 'events' for farmers looking for partners - they aren't all young!

As for being a Nun - umm, I think you might need a calling for that & lusting after farmers would probably make you wholly unsuitable grin

squoosh Tue 27-Aug-13 14:20:24

Well if you're single why don't you go for it, go to some of their balls, farmers love a bit of a wild time. I bet they have a dating website, let me see....................

squoosh Tue 27-Aug-13 14:22:46
JobsComfortBlanket Tue 27-Aug-13 14:26:34

You can forget about marrying a farmer unless you've got a) money or b) land.

Do you know any farmers, OP? They don't tend to be especially - how can I put it - enlightened, liberal types.

Most of the farmers I know are revolting bigots who live in squalor (whilst owning millions of pounds worth of capital assets) and loathe anyone who isn't a farmer.

squoosh Tue 27-Aug-13 14:30:43

Plus you'll never be able to go on holidays or days away from the farm.

Dahlen Tue 27-Aug-13 14:34:21

I wanted to be a nun. Eventually I realised that not believing in God would cause a bit of a problem.

Then I wanted to be a vet, then a journalist, then a spy. Eventually I became an archaeologist. Now I do something completely different again.

I never wanted to marry a farmer. Seems like really, really hard work and I would worry that my farmer would die/leave me at a point where I could be left with nothing and no chance of starting again. If the farming lifestyle was that important to me, I'd learn how to become a farmer myself. Could you start with a small-holding? grin

theboutiquemummy Tue 27-Aug-13 14:35:23

I know a single farmer which part of the country are you in x

primallass Tue 27-Aug-13 14:36:12

I really fancied a farmer boy at school. His house was fabulous blush

Doubtfuldaphne Tue 27-Aug-13 14:41:38

I grew up watching the darling buds of may and dreamed of a life in the countryside with a pony in an orchard and loads of kids and home cooked dinners. I spent every day in the local stables mucking out and riding horses. It was lovely but it always felt like I was still just playing at being in this idyllic lifestyle.
I would've loved to have met a farmer and had that life for real. Would I have been as happy as I am now though? My husband is wonderful but he's not a farmer! I do live in the countryside but as I don't drive it's quite isolating. I now dream of living in the city.
The grass always seems greener on the other side.

darlingdaffodils Wed 28-Aug-13 08:03:26

I LOVED Darling Buds of May too!

I am in Yorkshire. Single too - would be a bit weird to be after a farmer if I were already married! I am not much of a catch though - those Young Farmer girls all seem to be the glossy and gorgeous type!

Small holding ..... I have a vegetable patch in the garden!

Wow Squoosh - there are a lot of sites!

Jobscomfortblanket - not fussed about liberal .... squalor might be an issue though!

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood Wed 28-Aug-13 08:15:44

Good friends of ours are farmers. Lovely people. Great fun. And he is certainly liberal and enlightened. A thoroughly decent man.

But it's not an easy life. They never go on holiday. Theirs is not a large farm. He does the animals and she runs the holiday let and stables. But recently she has taken on an administrative job as well (employed elsewhere) driven by financial concerns.

But YANBU to have this as your dream. Provided you do something about it.

Whojamaflip Wed 28-Aug-13 08:16:12

I married a farmer <smug>

its great as long as you don't mind being a single parent for most if the spring and summer, are happy taking holidays in the winter, enjoy the fact that the house is constantly covered in straw/ muck/corn etc and the washing pile has a life (and smell) of its own!

oh and the fact that you will always come last in his affections - the cows/sheep/dog/tractor will always be ahead of you in the pecking order.

but apart from all that, I wouldn't change it for the world grin

I bet you read ENid Blyton fairy tale versions of farming OP, like Mistletoe Farm and Cherry Tree Farm when you were a kid, or similar. I doubt that real farming is much like them. Maybe you could go on a working holiday to a real farm and see how much you like it then,

Dobbiesmum Wed 28-Aug-13 08:37:05

I married into a lovely enlightened and intelligent farming family, sadly not sitting on millions of pounds of assets though, it would be a huge help to them... Where do people get these nasty stereotypical ideas from?
As much as I would love to do it myself I can see how hard it is, especially now my IL's aren't in the best of health. They don't go on holiday together, haven't for years certain times of the year take a massive toll on their health and my MIL raised her children pretty much single handedly as FIL was up and out early and back and in bed late.

darlingdaffodils Wed 28-Aug-13 09:21:30

I read the Famous Five books but not the farm books - maybe I should!

There is just something about farms and farming - hard work and tiring but a different sort of tired - not office tired.

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