Terrible wedding behaviour.

(407 Posts)
WayHarshTai Wed 21-Aug-13 11:44:53

In light of the recent rash of threads about it, I thought we could have a compilation thread to keep them all in one place.

I'll start with my wedding, and my SIL.

We wanted her DS (who was about two and a half) to be a sort of page boy and wear the same style suit as his dad (best man) and the rest of the 'wedding party' including my DS. SIL said no as he woudn't want to wear a suit. And then promptly went out and bought him, that's right, a suit to wear.

She then asked if we could arrange a vegetarian meal for her despite the fact she is not a vegetarian. Which of course we did, although it smacked of 'making life difficult'. And she then managed to take both veggie meals on the day leaving my actual veggie cousin without a meal (still not sure how this happened).

At the ceremony she brought her DS in eating the World's Biggest Icecream™ which he then sat and slurped in his non matching suit all through the vows.

When we got to the venue she moved all the place settings around because she didn't like where she was sitting.

She then got very drunk very quickly, became very loud, heckled the speeches, announced her recent (six months ago) miscarriage to the room and then coralled me for nearly an on the balcony while she cried and told me how awful her life was.

I just found the whole thing quite funny (well, not the crying) and it makes for an interesting story, so if she was trying to ruin things it didn't work.

Anyway, that's my Terrible Wedding Behaviour story, I know you lot have some corkers, so spill.

ProphetOfDoom Wed 21-Aug-13 12:45:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JustCallMeMaam Wed 21-Aug-13 12:45:35

I feel bad for the period stain woman - could you imagine how mortified you'd be if that happened to you? I have to admit I'd also be tempted to shuffle off and not mention it...!

ajandjjmum Wed 21-Aug-13 12:48:36

Goodness Fakebook - I bet the poor woman was mortified. Did you know who it was?

Libra Wed 21-Aug-13 12:48:59

I was very ill before our wedding. VERY ill. It turned out later that I had salmonella poisoning, but when I went to the doctor before the wedding he told me it was just 'nerves'.

I was so ill that I lost enormous amount of weight in the week before the wedding and so the fitted dress didn't.

We were getting married in York. DH is from Scandinavia, as is Best Man. Best Man did not arrive in the UK until the night before the wedding and did not bring a suit because 'he thought he would buy one in York'. Wedding is at 2.00.

Husband to be and Best Man leave the house at around 11.00 that morning to buy a suit (!) I am busy being ill and my mother is busy trying to sew me into my dress, hold me up, and scream at my husband to be and best man to MOVE!!

Best man buys a suit in Moss Bros. It is now quarter to 2. He changes into the suit at Moss Bros and then the two of them run through the ancient and beautiful city of York to the church on the other side of the city. They get there just as my mother is about to combust. They go into the church.

They get there just in time. Best man then realises that he has left the rings in his other clothes at Moss Bros. Best man volunteers to run all the way back through the city to get the rings. Best man has never been to York before, but husband to be thinks that this is a good idea.

I arrive at church with my father in a car. I am half-fainting by this point. We are told to drive around the church until best man returns.

15 minutes later, best man returns and runs into church. He leaves coat in vestry and goes to the front to meet my groom.

Then he realises that he left the rings in his coat in the vestry.

I walk up the aisle as best man and groom run down it. The only person standing at the altar is my MIL, who has decided that this is where she is going to stand rather than the seat my mother has tried to make her sit in.

We do eventually get married, but I have no memories of the ceremony at all (this may be a reason for annulment if I ever need it). We have a nice lunch reception but I have no memories of the reception at all. We have many many photos taken, but I have no memories of this at all. I do remember forcing myself to stand straight and smile for the camera through the pain.

Husband carries me away to our house. Literally carries me and not in a romantic way. We will be spending the night there before leaving on honeymoon. We are supposed to be going out for romantic meal at our favourite restaurant but I can't do it and just want to sleep. Some how, it is agreed that husband and best man will go out for the meal instead. So they sit at romantic table specially decorated by nice restaurant owner and have special romantic dinner. Restaurant staff are confused, particularly since the best man's name is Bent.

Husband returns. I get iller during the night and the next morning I am taken to hospital in ambulance. MIL appears at this point and says triumphantly as she sees me holding my stomach on a stretcher, 'See, I knew she was pregnant!!' Husband has to ring my parents to break it to them that I had to be hospitalised after our wedding night.

I am in an isolation ward for five days. Husband only allowed to visit in mask and after much use of some sort of smelly antiseptic wash.

I comfort myself that at least I forced myself to smile for the photos. We will have the photos even I can't remember the wedding.

It takes five days before husband breaks it to me that the camera broke and there are no photos.

Once out of the hospital I had to write to all guests with a special letter supplied by the health authority warning them that they had been in contact with me and begging them for any photos they might have taken with me and groom in them.

We had no honeymoon.

MIL moved into the house while I was in hospital and opened the presents.

Do I win?

Pawprint Wed 21-Aug-13 12:51:21

I know this is a bit PFB but I was irritated by a man at my SIL's wedding who sat opposite me and my new baby and chain smoked throughout the meal. I should have said something, but in the end I just moved.

Pawprint Wed 21-Aug-13 12:53:23

Some how, it is agreed that husband and best man will go out for the meal instead. So they sit at romantic table specially decorated by nice restaurant owner and have special romantic dinner. Restaurant staff are confused, particularly since the best man's name is Bent.

ROFL! Classic! Poor you though, being that ill on your wedding day. And grrr re. the suit and rings...

limitedperiodonly Wed 21-Aug-13 12:54:24

A colleague's wedding. Loads of us from the office went.

One of our group was whining constantly about how poncey it was. It wasn't, but he's prolier than thou. Unfortunately there was someone else like him there.

They sniped about the other guests, the 'pretentious' food - I don't know whether they were supposed to serve bitter and pork scratchings - even the cigarettes the restaurant sold - they didn't have Benson and Hedges, just poncey 'southern' brands like Silk Cut.

All this was while getting steadily drunker - their objection to the wine didn't stop them necking it.

One of them started a row with the groom's mother who understandably looked a bit catsbum. He then threw a punch at the groom when he stuck up for his mum.

The joke is that whatever our backgrounds, all of us now have very middle-class lifestyles, including this bloke who must hate every moment of living in a very nice house in a very nice part of north London.

Pawprint Wed 21-Aug-13 12:54:28

Oh, and the photos that never happened. Grim. Your MIL sounds a piece of work.

Groovee Wed 21-Aug-13 12:56:02

Dh's SIL gatecrashed being a bridesmaid. Didn't ask and just expected she was one. Had a few issues with us going shopping and loosing her and my then 13 year old niece saying, "she's gone to the maternity department!" My other bridesmaid had to haul her out of there on a few occasions.

Night before the wedding we're staying over at mine. Dh has gone to his mums with his brother. She kept saying something about fake tan and my friend begging her not to do it.

Next morning I wake up and go to the loo. All I hear is "I look like a jobby!" Then all I hear is my 13 year old niece saying "Well you were told not to do it!" (love my niece to bits, even at 28 she still speaks her mind!)

She spent most of the day attempting to scrub it off with bleach!! And not being where she was meant to be because she was in the loo with the nail brush she'd helped herself to from my house!!

Pobblewhohasnotoes Wed 21-Aug-13 12:56:48

Libra yes you win. That sounds horrendous, poor you!

Groovee Wed 21-Aug-13 12:59:29

OMG LIBRA!!!!!!!

Fakebook Wed 21-Aug-13 13:00:09

No we don't know who it was. I do feel sorry for whoever it was and yes she may have been suffering from a heavy period or something else, but if you know that you're prone to this, then why not come prepared? I suffered from heavy periods before I had children and before going out I used to keep a spare set of underwear, pads and feminine wipes just in case it started out of the blue.

Also, I don't think the woman was disgusting (whoever she was), it was the blood itself.

Edendance Wed 21-Aug-13 13:01:15

Midnite, that is unbelievable!! How could that bridge think that's ok?! Fakebook, don't you just feel bad for the poor woman, I'd have been mortified if it was me! I remember leaking on a chair when I was an early teen, at home while on the computer. Luckily managed to get the whole stain out but have never forgotten how I felt!

WayHarshTai Wed 21-Aug-13 13:01:22

'prolier than thou'.

Oh I am stealing that.

Libra, you win.

shock

DuchessFanny Wed 21-Aug-13 13:01:49

paw it was awful

I have another ...
Went to my BIL and SIL's wedding, they had several bottles of champagne dotted around in big ice tubs so people could top themselves up. My other SIL steals and hides SIX bottles behind her chair and conspiratorially whispers to me " hey Duchess, at least WE won't run out eh ?" forgetting totally i have a newborn and not drinking. She then got so plastered that she fell backwards whilst watching the fireworks display and knocked herself clean out. She was so embarrassed the next day ( and in some pain !)
Luckily there was a doctor there and she was ok in the long run !

Libra Wed 21-Aug-13 13:01:53

Thanks! It was 23 years ago now, so maybe we should try for a vow renewal at 25 years (one I can remember next time).
The awful thing is that this was DH's second wedding and his first wife was also admitted to hospital on their wedding day (allegic thing).
I tell him that he must never get married again on the grounds that third time might prove fatal.

StickyFloor Wed 21-Aug-13 13:03:57

OMG Lbra you win, hands down. Goodness me, what a story.

My wedding, SIL wanted her friends to be invited to the evening do, when I said no, because of the budget and they weren't friends of either DH or I, she took a huff and threatened to not attend in the evening, my reply was Okay, Bye.
MIL moaned for weeks about who was invited, budget again, the colour scheme, the food and how impossible it was to buy an outfit.
Other SIL complained that my wedding would impact on her birthday, a week later, and every one would by focused on the wedding and not her.

Other peoples weddings, Birthday SIL announced to a room full of people that the bridesmaid at her cousins wedding was Fuck Ugly and shouldn't be allowed out, the bridesmaid was 10years old. She also offended her GM, cousin and aunt by announcing that her GM was selfish and ignorant.

My Step MIL stuffed half a tier of weeding cake down the front of her dress, for a midnight snack, and lost half of it out of the bottom of her skirt when she came to shake hands.

Edendance Wed 21-Aug-13 13:05:56

Haha bride not bridge...

quesadilla Wed 21-Aug-13 13:07:07

Not sure if this counts as "terrible" but my SIL accused me of ruining her wedding (screamed this at hundreds of decibels in front of my parents) because I was five minutes late to church.

Unfortunate, yes, but over-reaction much?

TheProsAndConsOfHitchhiking Wed 21-Aug-13 13:07:32

Marking place for this, I love a good wedding thread but have to go out, so will catch up later grin

BerylStreep Wed 21-Aug-13 13:10:09

Libra, you win.

Fake - you have no idea. I once flooded through three super-sized sanitary towels worn together, plus black knickers and tights and trousers, within half an hour of putting them on. How else should I have prepared? How mortifying for that poor woman.

BlazinStoke Wed 21-Aug-13 13:13:11

Libra, but you laugh about it now, right?

oscarwilde Wed 21-Aug-13 13:13:17

Libra - you definitely win. OH. MY. GOD
Your MIL moved in ? For how long?

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