To get rid of the children?

(33 Posts)
AtYourCervix Mon 19-Aug-13 15:25:01

They are foul tempered, rude, nasty, noisy, messy, expensive and stressy.

I'm fed up with them. They hate me. I don't like them much. It's high time they went.

OnTheBottomWithAWomensWeekly Mon 19-Aug-13 15:25:51

Went where?

Chottie Mon 19-Aug-13 15:26:43

Put the kettle on, have a cup of tea, take a deep breath and take your DC out.

Let them have a good run in the sunshine and you will all feel better.

CaptainSweatPants Mon 19-Aug-13 15:27:02

Pack them off to a sports camp for a week

AtYourCervix Mon 19-Aug-13 15:27:10

Don't care really. Out of earshot preferably.

OnTheBottomWithAWomensWeekly Mon 19-Aug-13 15:28:04

Put them in the garden and lock the door thats what I do

CaptainSweatPants Mon 19-Aug-13 15:28:07

Or grandparents

It's free grin

AtYourCervix Mon 19-Aug-13 15:28:42

If men behave like that it's all 'leave the bastard'. If dogs do it they get sent back yo the farm. But children you're bloody stuck with. Do unfair.

IsabelleRinging Mon 19-Aug-13 15:29:37

YANBU! I always said I should have just got more cats!

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes Mon 19-Aug-13 15:31:36

are they old enough to be ignored while you take a bottle of wine and some sweets into the bath with you... oh and headphones?

AtYourCervix Mon 19-Aug-13 15:32:56

They are old enough to move out and seek their fortunes (near enough anyway).

Foul beings.

peachypips Mon 19-Aug-13 15:35:21

I feel like that today too. And have two extras too making it worse. Argh.

TheOnlyPink Mon 19-Aug-13 15:35:34

Yanbu! Mine are driving me to distraction today. Just gave them some biscuits so they would bugger off and leave me have a coffee.
We have already been out for a run around. It was all "look at meeeee! No, look at MEEEE!"

Only 4 hours until bed time.

FrussoHathor Mon 19-Aug-13 15:36:25

Swap ya.

Mine behave for other people. little toe-rags for me

Lweji Mon 19-Aug-13 15:37:52

I have just dumped my DS with my parents and then will do with DSis, for a total of 3 weeks. grin

Looking forward for the silence at home (although I still have a cat who's feeling very neglected after 2.5 weeks) but only for a couple of days.

Iamsparklyknickers Mon 19-Aug-13 15:38:24

YANBU - Sack 'em off.

Can you set up camp in your room surrounded by goodies, wine and a half decent film?

Tell them to go to the neighbours if one of the starts bleeding or give them the St John Ambulance website.

AtYourCervix Mon 19-Aug-13 15:39:55

God I miss the days when I could put them to bed at 7.

Horrible beasts don't go before me any more.

fluckered Mon 19-Aug-13 15:42:45

now I don't feel so bad for giving my 4 year old an ice cream for his breakfast sat morning so I could just have a cuppa in peace and let my eyes focus!

freddiefrog Mon 19-Aug-13 15:43:52

I wish I could bin mine today as well

I've got 6 of them here, only 2 of which are actually mine. I keep kicking them all out, only for them to all sneak back in to play Minecraft

MissDD1971 Mon 19-Aug-13 15:45:19

I am not a parent (eek!) - can you offload them onto kind (and insane) friend who could take them out or have them for the day?

and yes, grandparents/aunties etc who haven't been involved. Now's their time to shine.

My mum (who was a teacher) was a saint and/or mad - she'd happily take out other people's kids (before and after she had us) for day and also would have birthday parties for me and my brother and invite our entire classes. Other, more sane parents would not do this. My mum loved it.

she's still alive, maybe I can send her to you OP like a Mrs Doubtfire?!

MissDD1971 Mon 19-Aug-13 15:46:08

I'll prob get flamed for this too, is the attic an option? does it have a lock?! evil smile

AtYourCervix Mon 19-Aug-13 15:46:24

Nobody else would want them, they are that foul.

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes Mon 19-Aug-13 15:47:15

in that case... change the locks and pretend you are out grin we relish the days and evenings when both of ours are out, tis the only time we can get it together! the buggers never go to sleep.

PedantMarina Mon 19-Aug-13 15:50:12

Send them to work downa the mines. I've warned DS (3.5) that if he has one more tantrum, that's where he's going.

MissDD1971 Mon 19-Aug-13 15:50:21

AtYourCervix - would it help it you feigned illness?

maybe one would kindly help mum and play nurse?! or maybe the little beasts would just run havoc anyway??!! (sorry for being unkind about your kids btw :-) )

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