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AIBU?

to ask why is it frowned upon to remember things some posters' say

212 replies

fluckered · 06/08/2013 14:02

without actually doing a search, why is it not ok to perhaps ask a poster who previously posted for example "I have twin boys both starting school son" who then asks for advice on how to adopt for example as they don't have children .... "hang on a second, I thought you said last week you have twin boys". why is this frowned upon? people are accused of doing advanced searches when some people actually have a good memory or remember a thread as it resounded more for them than others ... and are asked "eh, what has that to do with this thread". am genuinely asking. wouldn't be for someone following a poster around and tearing shite out of everything they post ... but why cant a poster's posting history be questioned if there are obvious inconsistencies?!

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TimeofChange · 06/08/2013 14:04

OP: I agree with you.

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ceeveebee · 06/08/2013 14:05

I know exactly what you mean, I have a very good memory and find it hard to hold back sometimes!
I suppose its effectively troll hunting if you are questioning the truth of their posts. So you should report but not post your concerns?

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Justforlaughs · 06/08/2013 14:07

I think it depends on exactly what has been said in the past, I know that a lot of people change details (number of/ ages of children etc) to remain anonymous, but there's got to be a happy medium.

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Arisbottle · 06/08/2013 14:08

I am always amazed when people remember posts from other people, I never look at who has posted rather what they have posted.

Obviously the example you gave is a glaring contradiction but I have probably changed the ages of my children if posting something sensitive.

I find it a little odd that you would actively search through someone's history to prove a point but nothing wrong in remembering if you can .

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LEMisdisappointed · 06/08/2013 14:10

So is that what happened then OP?Cos if it it did, this is a fred about a fred and tis against the rules!! >

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YouStayClassySanDiego · 06/08/2013 14:12

I have a very good memory for threads and also look at the nn of the poster, some people say they never notice the nn but I always do!

I don't think there's anything wrong with asking if they've posted before or that the thread seems familiar or seems a bit odd as long as there's no abuse or bullying.

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fluckered · 06/08/2013 14:21

LEM it is a fed about a fed i guess lol but it bugs me that you can't question anything at all. i mean its easy to name change so if you want to be anon about a topic that's there to use. but if you don't and contradict yourself why the hell is it not ok to question it. ah, i dunno! i have a shite memory as not on that often but on a previous site you were shot with a ball of your own shite if you dare question a poster. Justforlaughs there has to be a happy medium i agree. but i feel in an non abusive way you should be able to ask (OP can ignore if they wish) about something that they previously posted if it contradicts.

as for doing a search, if someone accused me of bullying them or lying or something, damn right i will search to back up my point!

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cacamilis · 06/08/2013 14:32

Firstly how do you name change and when you do is it only for one thread and then you revert back to your original name iykwim?

I have a good memory too and think if its relevant to the thread it should be ok to mention a previous post in a different thread. However I hate when people bring up stuff you have mentioned in a previous thread that has no bearing on the thread in hand, usually you end up been quoted out of context and its done to make you look bad.Angry

If someone accuses me of lying then yes I would consider looking up the relevant post, and either prove my point or eat humble pie.

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fluckered · 06/08/2013 14:34

I don't think you can revert back to the other name, maybe you can. but say I change my name to gobshite ( Wink ) will all of fluckered's previous posts now be posted by gobshite or will fluckered be eternally lost?

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Pagwatch · 06/08/2013 14:38

I guess it's because if you say 'hang on op - you said you had twins' you are kind of calling troll/pants on fire when op may have just altered some facts so as to not be immediately recognised?

I am impressed by people having such good memories. My memory is awful.

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limitedperiodonly · 06/08/2013 14:40

Because you get accused of stalking or being part of a gang of haterz, when in fact the poster might be fond of colourful and contradictory stories which can't help but stick in your brain.

Hence, I don't bother any more.

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fluckered · 06/08/2013 14:42

but why is it calling troll? I mean if you REALLY want to be that anon change name or I dunno ... be consistant with your "story" (not saying lies). as for being recognised? just don't be so open on the internet.

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Maryz · 06/08/2013 14:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fluckered · 06/08/2013 14:45

but people only get annoyed when a poster swears blind that they DIDN'T say such and such and are caught out at not being consistent. they don't have to be .... their call, but its rich getting defensive then innit?

(ps. that's my first innit ... did I use it right? Wink )

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Maryz · 06/08/2013 14:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sconset · 06/08/2013 14:46

It's one of the reasons I barely post now- photographic memory, and it freaks people out too much Sad

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fluckered · 06/08/2013 14:48

yeah I see your point Maryz and I struggled not to find an example that wasn't inflammatory but I would understand if someone said "oh yeah, that wasn't correctly true I am trying to stay anonymous" i'd say no more. I totally understand for privacy reasons ... but is it too much to ask to be consistant or to at least realise not everyone is that arsed to advance search and actually DO have a memory for detail or usernames?

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navada · 06/08/2013 14:49

I can't remember what someone said an hour ago let alone months or even years ago, plus I don't take much notice of posters names.
And yes, I'd feel like a bit of a weirdo/stalker if I remembered what a poster said on an anonymous forum, unless they were offering me fantastic advice - that's different.

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Gunznroses · 06/08/2013 14:50

OP i know exactly what you mean. I was reading through the Education thread, and a popular poster described parents at a particular school as 'none are ghastly...'. Months ago i had happened to have read a thread about the same school where the same poster had said 'some of the parents are ghastly and i avoid them" it stuck in my mind as i thought it a bit odd (bearing in the poster had never spoken to them before). I just let it go, but thought it interesting, just goes to show, don't make important life changing decisions based on what one Mner has said.

Some things just stick for whatever reason, it doesn't mean we're wasting our time doing thread searches.

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FrigginRexManningDay · 06/08/2013 14:53

If people want to remain anon then yes they can absolutely change details. It makes sense. I remember posts from usernames that click with me.

And Maryz you were probably deleted because it was not clear whether the shit was bull or cow and to infer it was bull without clear and concise evidence would be inflammatory.

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magimedi · 06/08/2013 14:53

If you change your name to Gobshite only the posts you made in that name will show up as it. All your fluckered's will remain fluckered.

I know that as I've Yoni namechanged in the past.

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magimedi · 06/08/2013 14:54

PS

I do like fluckered - I think I might start using that as in: "I'm fluckered if I know.." Grin

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Maryz · 06/08/2013 14:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FrigginRexManningDay · 06/08/2013 14:55

Navada do not,under any circumstances attempt to lick your own elbow.

Will you remember me forever and always? Grin

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Maryz · 06/08/2013 14:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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