to have collected all the dummies and thrown in full view of dd2 in the rubbish bin outside?

(80 Posts)
flowerandrandd Tue 30-Jul-13 13:13:06

my dd2 is 4. she is extremely strong willed, at times very difficult to deal with. We have tried to get rid of the dummy on numerous occassion, we go on holiday on sunday and i am sick to death with her constant anxiousness over where her dummy is, turning the house over to bloody find it etc.
we have tried only giving it her at night but she is the kind of child who will continually ask on and on and on and she breaks you!

anyway i am desperate for some tips because she is hysterical and is screaming that she is still little and needs it but we have to go cold turkey.... she is also shouting that she is never sleeping again and that her daddy will get them out the bin... please help me!

flowerandrandd Wed 31-Jul-13 18:34:05

www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDBCOV8s0uo

to anyone who is going through the same, this was an absolute life saver we have watched it near on 25 times, i think it helped my dd2 understand that it happened to all children that had dummies, must nicer approach than my intial loosing of my rag! grin

flowerandrandd Wed 31-Jul-13 18:30:20

theodorakiss not quite sure what you are on about to be honest, i am a sahm and my children couldnt be more socialised, as i said my daughter in question has an iron will anyway whatever...

well not a peep last night, she sometimes woke in the night for me to find her dummy, didnt happen last night and she is like a different child today, there is no stress on either of our parts, wish i had done it sooner but i think she was ready yesterday probably not before smile

just want to say thank you to everyone who helped me through yesterday, we do have a tendency of loosing our way sometimes with this parenting minefield so to have the support and even negative comments about how nasty i have been goes a long way in helping me rectify situations! xxx

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes Wed 31-Jul-13 16:58:49

jamdonut great minds think alike eh grin

jamdonut Wed 31-Jul-13 15:57:18

Father Christmas took DS1's dummies,when he was 4 for the baby reindeer!!!! He's 21 in 3 weeks! He and I rounded them all up so they went at the same time. grin

Can't remember with DD...she wasn't so attached to them,and just stopped using them.

DS2 was VERY attached to his dummies, one in the mouth and one in each hand!! When he started in Foundation I told him that he could only have one at night,because children never go to school with dummies. Then I made a big show of buying one last dummy. I told him when this is worn out, there are no more. He had it for ages! Then as he came up to his 5th birthday, I told him that this was ridiculous and that on his 5th birthday (hmmyes I know,don't judge)the dummy would go in the bin because he would be a big boy then. We did this with great ceremony, and although bedtime was hard for a couple of nights,he never looked back after that.

PostBellumBugsy Wed 31-Jul-13 15:53:48

Read the whole thread theodora before you start throwing stones. And what has socialising children got to do with dummies?

theodorakisses Wed 31-Jul-13 15:42:57

Horrid thing to do. Would you set fire to a teddy or have a well sucked thumb amputated? Whatever you think, you have been quite nasty. Normal people socialise their children and allow them to move on in their own way.

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes Wed 31-Jul-13 13:50:19

father xmas came for ds1's dummies when he was about 3, he put them out on the doorstep for him to give to the baby reindeer the week before xmas, had total meltdown at bedtime but he's 20 now and only cries for one sometimes now grin

3MonthMaid Wed 31-Jul-13 13:00:12

Good for you. She'll be fine!

shotofexpresso Wed 31-Jul-13 12:29:00

I used the dummy fairy for mine and I told him on his third birthday, they are taken to bigger babies

and are so grateful they leave some sweets behind,

he was ok after a week.

ChippingInHopHopHop Wed 31-Jul-13 12:08:07

How did it go? Did she sleep through? Has she asked for them today?

(13 hours a night - that's pretty impressive grin Lucky you!!)

GhoulWithADragonTattoo Wed 31-Jul-13 10:39:58

I have a 5 year old who still sucks her thumb and it's pushing out her teeth, including her first two adult teeth. If I could cut it off and chuck it in the bin I most certainly would so I'd say you are doing the right thing to get rid of them, OP.

PostBellumBugsy Wed 31-Jul-13 10:15:52

Great stuff flowerandrandd - so glad your DD went to sleep no problem.

FWIW, my DD is 11 now & seems to be functioning just fine, even though she was obsessed with her dummies before the fairy made off with them.

Altinkum Tue 30-Jul-13 20:03:41

I don't think it's cruel hmm

We done this with ds2, it was a day and a half of I neeeeeeddd my dodi! But on the second night he was fine and hasn't asked for it since.

He doesn't need a dummy, he wants his dummy!

I feel for you flower. DD will be 4 in December and she too is obsessed with her dummy. She's had one since birth so it's bound to bring her comfort.

Well done to your DD for going straight to sleep though. The bullet has been well and truly bitten! grin

One day I'll do it.. One day.

flowerandrandd Tue 30-Jul-13 19:51:53

Yes uk both my girls sleep 13 hours a night! They ask to go to bed! X

ChippingInHopHopHop Tue 30-Jul-13 18:48:51

Awww, bless. They look so little and so wonderfully quiet sweet when they're asleep don't they!

Are you in the UK? Just wondering if she's asleep before 6.30?

flowerandrandd Tue 30-Jul-13 18:35:24

To say I'm shocked is an understatement! She went straight to sleep, asked me to stroke her head within 3 mins gone! In true maternal guilt style I sat and cried at how mature my little girl was to handle such a massive change x

Greydog Tue 30-Jul-13 17:52:43

I've never understood the urge to get rid of dummies, as kids just grow out of them when they're ready. My boy loved his dummy, but didn't use it much when he went to nursery school. However, he kept one for emergencies, and when he came home he'd go to his room and have a quick dummy fix before tea! It just faded away after 4 years old, and no finger sucking ever!

Canidae Tue 30-Jul-13 17:48:20

My clearest first memory was of my mum trying to part me from my dummy! She bought me a special present (a Keypers toy) that I had after handing over all my dummies. I thought I could be clever by ripping up the box it came in so she couldn't return it and still keep my dummy! Of course that didn't work and each time I asked for it my mum would play with me with my new toy and I soon forgot.

Good luck OP!

Twattybollocks Tue 30-Jul-13 17:41:46

Def get the dummy fairy involved. Write a note secretly in your teensiest writing, saying thank you for the dummies they are going to baby xxxx who has just been born today and needs them because she is only a little baby. Finish off with a sprinkle of glitter and I guarantee she will be so entranced by the idea of the dummy fairy writing a letter and little baby xxxx having her dummies she will be fine. I just wish there was a bloody finger fairy for my finger sucking 7yo!

flowerandrandd Tue 30-Jul-13 17:41:15

It does doesn't it, anxious is what I'm feeling right now on the bedtime count down! X

valiumredhead Tue 30-Jul-13 17:38:58

Well obsessive puts a whole different slant on thingsgrin

flowerandrandd Tue 30-Jul-13 17:37:52

Anxious was probably wrong way to describe it, more obsessive over her precious dummy, listen Valium no hard feelings I was annoyed with what you said because I was pissed off at myself for handling situation so badly but as I said it ext posts I've tried to rectify my actions ad hopefully all will be well, don't think she will wind up in therapy over it x

Well done OP. Hope you get some sleep tonight wink

valiumredhead Tue 30-Jul-13 17:35:30

Yes, most children do have a comfort object but the OP states she is anxious that's what I was picking up on.

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