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to think that an 'estimated' due date in 2013 is not good enough

(82 Posts)
Thyeternalsummer Fri 26-Jul-13 11:40:02

Getting exceedingly p'd off with the whole EDD thing. 38 + 6 today and baby theoretically due next Saturday. But of course could have been born at any point in preceding two weeks, or two weeks after.

Which is a bit crap really. They probably predicted baby's due date with as much accuracy 500 years ago.

Surely there must be some statistical analysis taking into account baby's size, previous pregnancies, mothers weight/height, genetic indicators etc which would let you predict with greater accuracy than 'some point within x four weeks'.

Bet if it was men that got pregnant, your due date would be calculable down to the hour and you'd receive daily count down text reminders! wink

As you can tell, I'm a bit fed up!

MerylStrop Sun 28-Jul-13 15:01:10

Realising that birth, like pretty much all parenting, is something that you cannot be in control of is a very, very good thing indeed.

OP what needs to be done is that you need to take yourself off and go to the cinema in the day, go swimming with other humungous ladies, eat a long leisurely lunch in a fancy cafe, and savour the alone-ness.

Dido, ickle - big love.

DidoTheDodo Sun 28-Jul-13 14:56:56

All made worse by the Royal baby and baby-related everything being very prominent at present.

Off to hide. Thread and self.

zatyaballerina Sun 28-Jul-13 14:56:37

yanbu, it's always torturous by the time you get to the last couple of weeks, it's so uncomfortable you just want the baby out, it must be ten times worse in this weather. On the bright side you will absolutely have your baby with you in three weeks at the latestsmile Look at it that way.

SoupDragon Sun 28-Jul-13 14:53:13

I'm sorry to hear that Dido sad How dreadful.

Nevertheless, if people weren't allowed a light hearted whinge about something simply because there is someone worse off/wanting to be in their position, we wouldn't be allowed to complain about anything.

If a thread upsets you, it is best to simply hide it.

DidoTheDodo Sun 28-Jul-13 14:49:05

Not light because DD lost 27+4 baby very recently.
That good enough reason to hope that women who are pg would be glad and stop moaning about the weather, producing early etc?

From my perspective, it does feel a bit unreasonable.

I kind of get the ones who are saying "you are lucky to be pg" though - but anyone who doesn't want to click on this thread would have enough from the OP to know what it's about.

When I was about 16-18 weeks pg with DC2 (my DD) I had a car accident. (Also had an early MC before DD)
So the last 3 months of pg (ligaments stretching/getting bigger/no painkillers except paracematol/ 24 hour pain) were grim.

Every day once I was past the magic 36 weeks I said to bump "Whenever you like, today would be good"
but never out loud.

So yes, I do sympathise with being heavily pg in July.
But I've seen things from both sides too. sad

diddl Germany Sun 28-Jul-13 10:14:36

When I went into labour & phoned my ILs to come over & look after PFB, they got into a right tiz.

Mil asked me what she should do with the casserole she had put in the oven & handed me over to FIL.

He asked me what time I would be having the baby so that they knew how long they would be staying.confusedgrin

Husband had to prise my fingers off the door frame as I wailed that I wanted a home birth...

mrsspagbol Sun 28-Jul-13 09:56:29

As someone sat here at 40 plus 7 i feel OP is VVV reasonable.

Should I ever be expecting again, I feel they should not bother with giving me an EDD - it reall doesn't suit my my
controlling personality type.

SoupDragon Sun 28-Jul-13 09:45:11

That's helpful hmm

oh lighten up dido

DidoTheDodo Sun 28-Jul-13 09:34:10

You're lucky to be pregnant.
Just chill and wait as women have always had to do.

outragedofsuburbia Sun 28-Jul-13 09:33:50

I meant lovely baby although will be lively too I am sure.

outragedofsuburbia Sun 28-Jul-13 09:32:09

I think in the modern western world we are too used to having control and being able effect our environment. In birth we can't and it really seems to concern some women and their partners and makes them anxious. The only way we can gain control is c-section and even that can have unpredictable outcomes and unforeseen future consequences. Induction is a very unpredictable process although people send to be under the misapprehension it's a case 1+1 = baby.

You really would be better off trying to let go of these feelings of control because when your lively baby decides to arrive all organisation and control will go out of the window!

maddening Sun 28-Jul-13 09:14:46

The detective - there is a natural expiration "date" though - placentas start to deteriorate between 40-42 weeks - obviously this varies from one person to another so some such as yourself may last longer.

Bogey - yes I know you can't help the anticipation but sometimes as an adult you can just sit back and try and relax a bit and remind yourself to enjoy it as well - it's also the kind of thing some wish they had done more of instead of getting stressed. Especially as short of induction or cesarean there's not much you can do. In addition being stressed isn't conducive to labour starting.

Bogeyface Netherlands Sat 27-Jul-13 23:57:07

The problem with people saying "Enjoy the calm before the storm" is that its like telling a child that its nearly Xmas but not telling them the date it will happen. Everyday they run down hoping for presents and every day you say "nope, not today, maybe it will be tomorrow". We want the big day, and every twinge makes us think "Is it today?".

If we had a definite EDD then we could focus on that. People saying "Oh I really enjoyed my PG, I read all the books I hadnt had time for" is really fecking annoying!

TheDetective Sat 27-Jul-13 23:48:30

There isn't a BBE date, as the placenta doesn't suddenly expire at 42 weeks grin.

OP, with DS2 I didn't want to be induced. I went 20 days past EDD in the end. First DS was also 13 days past EDD too.

With DS2 I got a positive pregnancy test on day 20 of my cycle. Due to him being so overdue, I actually knew I was pregnant for 10 months and 1 day! grin

It did feel like the longest pregnancy ever, but I didn't get fed up. Just enjoy it for what it is - as boring and crap as that may seem.

He's mega a mega stubborn baby by the way. I think he just started as he wanted to go on!

Your baby will be here by 16 days after the EDD most likely. Aim for that. smile

maddening Sat 27-Jul-13 23:33:14

Any films you haven't watched? Tv series that you fancied but never got round to watching? Books to read? May as well sit back and eat cake, enjoy nice cups of tea (not luke warm ones) and enjoy the calm before the storm smile

Um no babies come when they are ready there is no exact science

meditrina Sat 27-Jul-13 21:55:07

There sort of is a BBE date - 42weeks. Perhaps there should be more focus on the 2 week "window" rather than trying to tie it down to a day? Especially as stress hormones tend to delay onset.

ArgyMargy Argentina Sat 27-Jul-13 21:52:42

YAB totally U. You are a woman, not a machine. Silly moo.

revealall Sat 27-Jul-13 21:49:53

Mine was 10 days out according to doctors dates.
I had only had sex once the entire year and was exactly on the average (266 days) when I worked it out.

LilPeasMama Sat 27-Jul-13 21:36:23

That's it eternal I know exactly what you mean!
I reckon you should get a boxset on DVD and put you're feet up, oh how I wished I would have not seen Prison Break or 24 now, Gavin and Stacey maybe? What about Luther, I cannot recommend this enough, great programme!

ZingWidge Sat 27-Jul-13 18:56:06

I think there should be Best Before End date.
if baby's not born by then, mum would be induced or would have ELSC on BEE day.

no-one would ever again have to feel like a failure for being late as baby could only ever be early or on time.

problem sorted, job done

< bangs gavel >

I did a load of cooking and filled the freezer with meals to help in the first couple of weeks.

Otherwise RELAX you won't be doing much of that when the baby turns up.

Thyeternalsummer Sat 27-Jul-13 08:09:37

Think the problem is that I've done everything that needs doing already so I'm living in the set of the baby play without the lead character. There's nothing more I can do now...if I bought any more clothes for example he'd be fully kitted out until he was 18 wink

I'm so sceptical now when my partner talks about 'when the baby's here' ....feels like I'm humouring an elderly aunt talking to me about 'when the Queen comes to tea'.

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