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to have told the child in the supermarket to please stop staring

(210 Posts)
twilighteyes Mon 22-Jul-13 18:34:10

At the self service checkouts, I noticed a little girl (perhaps 7 or 8) looking at me. I had an "unexpected item" so assumed that was why she was looking, but then I became conscious of it and realised she was staring at me! I don't know why, as I wasn't wearing anything unusual and I don't think that I look remarkable, either in a positive or negative way.

As we were going out she was staring again and when I was getting into my car she and her mum (I presume) were getting into the one next to me and she was just staring. It was really making me feel uncomfortable and I said "hi, is there something I can help you with?" Girl turns scarlet, gets into the car and mum drives away. As I drove off she was staring again.

AIBU to think this is really rude? It made me feel really disconcerted (and yes I have checked and my skirt isn't in my pants or anything!)

MrsDeVere Wed 24-Jul-13 10:21:49

Why would i ask if she was a student? confused

Of course it was relevant. You posted on AIBU. If you drip feed information you will get answers that refer to the information you give.

It is setting people up to look mean and nasty if you then come back and tell everyone how ill you have been.

Its really not a very nice thing to do.

WinkyWinkola Wed 24-Jul-13 11:34:50

I think if a kid stares at you For ten minutes it's unsettling. Whether you have anxiety issues or not.

And of course it's not akin to throwing poo hmm but it's not really acceptable to stare at people and make them uncomfortable. Even if you are a kid of 7.

Bonkers on this thread. There was no violence. No aggression. No raised voice. And you're acting like she abused the child. Crackers.

Gruntfuttock Wed 24-Jul-13 11:45:11

Quite agree, Winky (and have said similar) but I particularly noticed the poster who said "if you had said that to my child you would be getting a nice big mouthful back from me." which made me think that she may well have shouted and sworn at the OP!

Mind you, I absolutely love babies and toddlers and often automatically smile when I see a them, e.g. in a supermarket, only to realise the mother or father they're with are looking at me as if they want to give me "a nice big mouthful" for daring to notice their child. confused

MrsMongoose Wed 24-Jul-13 13:37:36

What if she was staring because she thought you were breathtakingly beautiful? Are you than insecure OP that you needed to worry so much about a child's gaze?

Gruntfuttock Wed 24-Jul-13 13:45:52

Being stared at for a solid 10 minutes would make anyone uncomfortable, IMO, but I realise I'm in the minority.

MrsDeVere Wed 24-Jul-13 13:50:45

The OP asked a question. The vast majority of the responses have been on the mild side of 'think you were a bit OTT tbh'

The odd 'you are bonkers and mean'

and some agreeing with her.

This is AIBU. She hasn't been flamed. She has had answers.

Emilythornesbff Wed 24-Jul-13 14:26:37

No. I don't think anyone is "*acting like she abused the child*"

ViviPru Wed 24-Jul-13 14:30:02

What's an 'unexpected item?'

Emilythornesbff Wed 24-Jul-13 14:32:23

Oh vivipru thank you.
I have wanted to ask that from the start.

Cravey Wed 24-Jul-13 14:37:16

It was me who said about getting a mouthful. I think I said it as I read the op as maybe slightly bullying. I may have been wrong I admit that but still don't understand the logic of the op. op didn't mention anxiety issues etc until later on in fact she came across as a little odd. As others have said maybe the child had issues herself, no need to say anything IMO apart from maybe give the kid a grin. Which the op didn't. I wouldn't have sworn or shouted by the way maybe just asked what the issue appeared to be. I also think the op should have enquired to the child's carer not the child.

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