To be fed up with the nurse-bashing going on here this weekend

(165 Posts)
fledtoscotland Sun 14-Jul-13 23:25:42

Just that really.

Most of us are hard working people who do our best to remember everyone's name and not eat kettle chips when we should have a broom up our arses to ensure we don't slack

I just want to be treated with respect as I do my patients and do my job.

childof79 Mon 15-Jul-13 00:13:31

fledtoscotland - I have to say that there is a bit of problem in this country at the moment with a lack of respect for professionals. Doctors are equally disrespected. As are lawyers (maybe there is a reason for that one).

justkeeponsmiling Mon 15-Jul-13 00:15:33

McNewPants thank you!! I feel so strongly about my job and I mean every word of it.
I don't want more money for nurses. I don't want anything in fact.
All I want is for my patients, or their relatives to go home and think "That nurse, she made it a little better for me."
I really love my job with all my heart.

Butterflywgs Mon 15-Jul-13 00:22:45

Sigh there is a difference between posting about a specific experience and 'nurse-bashing'.
SOME nurses are bad.
If that's not you, the post was not about you and don't take it personally. But I don't think anyone is ever above reproach. No profession deserves respect automatically, a little 'disrespect' to counter the historical attitude that doctors and nurses were godlike authority figures is not a bad thing.
Yes caring professions attract a lot of lovely, good people who want to help others. On the other side of the coin they also attract some psychopaths who are looking for vulnerable people to abuse...

justkeeponsmiling Mon 15-Jul-13 00:25:14

Vatta thanks!
I don't know if I speak for all the nurses her - please correct me if I don`t!

Firstly - don't donate any money, it will never, ever reach us, not even as a contribution towards our fund for the xmas party! It just gets lost in some trustfund our ward will never, ever see.

Write a card to the ward - we WILL reade it and we WLL display it with pride and we WILL keep it

Give us some chocolates smile

Write a letter of thanks to the head of the hospital - it won't do that much for us to be honest, but I guess it'll be helpfull when it comes to the next rounds of laying off healthcare staff?

I'm glad you had a positive experience.
As I always say to my patients " that's what we are here for" smile

Another nurse here smile
There are plenty of days when we don't stop to eat or pee, but I love what I do, making a difference to somebody is important to me, so Ill keep doing it.

Vatta, in a rare lucid moment on my last week of nights, one of my patients with dementia was thanking me for all I do and offered to make love to me for a month to thank me grin would you consider a similar offer? Lol

justanuthermanicmumsday Mon 15-Jul-13 00:40:44

i was in Hospital last year very ill nearly died. Nurses and docs were amazing they came around the clock to do tests and meds ad drips. They never made me feel like i was a burden. Even the guys that bring round the meal trolleys one senior man went out of his way to find me extra food because i felt nautious from most the food i was given. Every evening he'd be liked right pet no meat right? so here's a veg sandwich and fruit for later, and you may as well have that other portion of sticky toffee pudding that wasn't eaten. he should be given an award. He was so old i felt bad that he was serving me the dude should have been retired, but the way the world is ppl can't afford to. They deserve medals.

Same goes for the nurses that tended to my mother througout her life she had a long term illness and was in and out of hospital a lot. They knew her on a first name basis, bathed her, took her to the toilet, fed her. My mum was a a bit snobby she would never have wanted to let other people do these things for her but they behaved in such a way that she felt at ease with them. They were wonderful. She also learnt most her English in hospital, after which me and siblings had to talk in code lol The ward staff appreciated the free homemade food too as a small gesture of thanks lol

ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmmmmmmmmm Mon 15-Jul-13 00:57:32

What "nurse bashing" ?? A couple of posters have had bad experiences with nurses, and were forthcoming about them. The majority of posters were very supportive of nurses in general. Do nurses actually believe they are all beyond criticism, and that no dissent from that pov should be allowed?
FWIW I have had good experiences, and bad. From supremely caring nurses, and absolutely appalling ones who should not have been allowed to look after a dog.

Darkesteyes Mon 15-Jul-13 01:02:46

I have nothing but respect for nurses They were great with my DH after his heart attack even when he made a bit of a nusance of himself going behind the desk at the nurses station while high on his meds.
I was dissappointed by some of the comments on the other thread. But it shows that the media propaganda against the NHS ( so they can say "look how much better it will be when privatised) is working just as well as the media propaganda against benefit claimants/single parents/disabled/carers.

neunundneunzigluftballons Mon 15-Jul-13 01:14:40

Tabu nurses are in general wonderful hard working caring people. You are being unreasonable to think that a vocal negative minority cause people who have had very positive experiences to doubt that. Keep doing what you are doing and know that you are very much appreciated.

outingmyselfprobably Mon 15-Jul-13 01:17:21

I must have missed the nurse bashing. Where was it OP?

I saw a thread about nurses eating crisps though.

In fact I don't think I've ever seen nurse bashing anywhere, least of all on here.

ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmmmmmmmmm Mon 15-Jul-13 01:24:54

Yep. All that media propaganda. A young man dying of thirst because staff were "too busy" to get him a drink. ( Last contact with his Mum, a text, saying please come quick, they're all standing round my bed, getting their stories straight). An old man in Stafford drinking out of a vase, such was his desperation.
We do nursing, and nurses, no favours if we dismiss such stories, and subsequent reporting of them, as DM propaganda. There are problems in the NHS, and pointing to them is essential, if they are to be addressed.

justkeeponsmiling Mon 15-Jul-13 01:31:25

I'm Really sorry, feel free to skip if you read this already tonight... but I WILL repost. cos I feel srtongly

Thank you!! This is what I just posted nin another thread...
YABU - I'M A NURSE

I know there's little chance of anyone ever actually reading this but I had to post-

I'm a nurse and if you are sick or in pain or heartbroken or desparate or confused I will care for you

- I will hold your hand

-I will talk to you all night

- I will stroke your hair untill you fall asleep

- AND YES, I MIGHT CALL YOU SWEETHEART OR DARLING OR LOVE!

-I will say "My sweetheart, I'm here for you"

- "My darling, try not to worry. Tomorrow is another day"

- "My love, tell me about your family"

- "Don't worry sweetie, I'm here all night"

- "You've done ever so well lovie. The worst bit is over, it's only up hill from here!"

- And "I'm here my darling. I'm close sweetheart. I'm watching over you when no one else will. I'm holding you, I'm wiping your forehead, I'M easing your pain and I'll stay with you till the end.
And when you are gone I will wash your pale body and dress you in the nicest clothes I have available and ask for your soul to rest in peace.
I will remember you, no matter if another million people or not a single person does.I promise I will carry you with me and hold your memory dear and never ever forget.

I'M A NURSE AND I LOVE MY JOB. I'M PROUD OF WHAT I DO. NOTHING I DO IS EVERT MEANT TO DEMEAN OR BELITTLE YOU. TODAY, TONIGHT, TOMORROW I WILL LEAVE MY OWN FAMILY BEHIND TO LOOK AFTER YOURS AND I WILL DO IT WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL.

BIG IT UP FOR THOSE NURSES AMONGST US WHO LOVE WHAT THEY DO!

Darkesteyes Mon 15-Jul-13 01:40:12

Things i was as horrified by those incidents as you are. And by what happened at Mid Staffs. The pain the families are going through cant be described adequately. But its not fair to say that most nurses and health professionals are like that because they arent.

Of course im assuming you would be equally appalled about the health professionals working for ATOS.

Justfornowitwilldo Mon 15-Jul-13 01:43:11

You want nurse bashing?

You arrive as a visitor on a ward that has a lot of elderly patients with dementia as well as illness. As you walk down the corridor you can hear your relative screaming and crying. There's no sign of any nurse. You get to their room which they share with other patients.

Your female relative is screaming and sobbing. She has been left half changed on dirty sheets. Her incontinence pad has been removed, the sheets are soiled and her nightdress has been pulled up towards her neck leaving her genitals and breast exposed. There are male patients on the ward too, in different rooms but they wander. She has slid on the bed so her head has slipped between the mattress and the bars. She is too weak from the cancer to get herself free. She is in pain and frightened. You aren't strong enough to move her alone. You have no idea how long she's been there.

You cover her, try to calm her and go looking for help. There are no nurses. You try looking into other rooms. No nurses. In the end you go out into the corridor and shout, calling out for help. By now it has been a good 15 minutes and your relative is still screaming and sobbing. You end up screaming for help. Eventually, one nurse pokes her head out of a room. Where every one of those excuses for fucking professionals are having a meeting. She wants to know what the problem is. You tell her. Her response is that they were dealing with it. That you are overreacting and should leave the ward. The senior nurse says that the care is in hand.

You mention that your relative has a brother who is a solicitor, and a cousin who is a doctor and that you are going nowhere until your relative is treated with some dignity and they do their jobs. Suddenly they spring into action, she is changed, the bed is changed, a chair is brought for you. Your relative is still terrified and upset. You say that you will not leave her alone in their care. Eventually a manager appears, apologies and grovelling ensues and a transfer is arranged.

How many times do you think they left a ward full of elderly, vulnerable patients unsupervised and ignored their screams? It wasn't one individual. It was every single one of them.

Secretswitch Mon 15-Jul-13 01:48:57

Nurses are some of the best people on earth! I come from a family of nurses and EMTS. I know how much work you do, how little the pay is, and how great the stress is. Not every nurse is perfect, after all nurses are human beings. Nurses have seen me through some of the best and worst times of my life. I thank all of you from heart..

neunundneunzigluftballons Mon 15-Jul-13 01:52:30

Justfornowitwilldo that was absolutely awful treatment of your relative but you cannot possibly think that those excuses for professionals came up with a plan whereby they would just abandon a ward. Poxy admin, procedures, meetings and emphasis in the system being put on avoiding and defending against litigation all cause what happened to you. For the record I would have done exactly the same as you re threatening to sue but that is in fact a part of the problem.

Justfornowitwilldo Mon 15-Jul-13 01:59:47

The attitude towards the patients in that ward was that they were circling the drain, why bother. My relative was moved. Most weren't and didn't have any visitors who could monitor the lack of care.

It wasn't me who walked in. If it had been me I would have had complaints filed against every single one of them individually. They were not fit to be there.

Justfornowitwilldo Mon 15-Jul-13 02:11:58

You know what I honestly think? That some nurses seem view basic patient care as beneath them.

mynewpassion Mon 15-Jul-13 02:18:50

Hooray for fledtoscotland.

justanuthermanicmumsday Mon 15-Jul-13 02:22:10

i have had good care from nurses but i have heard of bad Care from a best friend. Her dad had a bladder condition never ill in his life before. So he told the nurse he needed to pee but she didnt bring the bed pan, she kept putting it off like he could wait. He lost all sense of dignity wetting himself in front of his daughter and sons grown adults. course they understood he couldn't help it, but we all have a sense of dignity we wish to keep right? What was the nurses response? Blame the victim "look what you've done now I'm going to have to change the sheets". Worse my friend didnt respond in fear they would mistreat her dad after visiting was over. This is sickening and such nurses aren't nurses, its just any old job for them, they may as well work in a fast food joint. These ppl shouldn't be trusted with animals let alone ppl. The problem is recruitment, compassionate caring individuals need to be sought and it needs to be demonstrated in training before the job is given to them, and if any concerns are raised they need to be warned then fired. Not kept on with this casual attitude that they will make do?

SoleSource Mon 15-Jul-13 02:39:54

My DS was born 24 weeks. The nurses were vile aside from three. After birth he was in and out of the Chidren's hospital in Birmingham. Dew nurses were ok the rest were vile.

SoleSource Mon 15-Jul-13 02:42:10

When I had menningitus and was at the QE in B'ham for three weeks, every single nurse were fab!

FirstStopCafe Mon 15-Jul-13 03:46:36

I will never forget the care, kindness and dedication shown by the wonderful nurses who cared for my dd

MammaTJ Mon 15-Jul-13 04:13:32

Justfornowitwilldo, your relative is why I am going to be starting my nursing degree at age 46. I started my working life by working in one of the big Victorian psychiatric hospitals. You know, one of the ones they closed in the '80's. Most of the staff in them were as institutionalised as the patients.

I watched the programme about nurses a couple of years ago where a man was throwing faeces from his side room on to the ward a couple of years ago and the nurses shouted at him. She was clearly at a loss as to what to do with someone with obvious mental health problems of one kind or another.

I was torn between mental health and general nursing, as I love looking after the elderly with dementia. I currently work in a home for the elderly with mental health problems. I settled on Adult Nursing as the way things are going, there are increasing numbers of elderly with dementia on the general wards, so I will get to look after those I enjoy looking after and be doing that by choice rather than as an inconvenience to the 'real job' I want to do, which is how I feel some nurses by no mean all view it.

I cannot explain the situation you walked in to though and cannot guarantee I will never be in that situation. I cannot predict what management will force upon me. I can only promise I will do my best.

OP, as for nurse bashing, your op made me think of Amanda Holden (sorry) and the way she says she got a bashing on here. The reality is, she didn't. She had some people saying how terrible she was, she had a lot of people sticking up for her. That is what has happened about nurses this weekend. I was at one point disheartened, but I went back and re-read. There may be a minority slagging off nurses and, on the 'kettle chips' thread, there was certainly one repeatedly saying the same thing over and over but the majority were sticking up for nurses.

daisychain01 Mon 15-Jul-13 05:30:03

I couldnt believe the thread where people were criticising nurses for saying darling and sweetheart. How petty and ungrateful!! It was completely missing the point ie that nurses do an amazing job in the majority of cases, day in day out, and that is what really counts. People were analysing it as being demeaning and not giving dignity. Well, let me say, my other half was being treated for cancer about a year ago and I genuinely cannot remember what his nurses called him, but by goodness they were there for him 24/7 for as long as he needed their care and I thank God for those wonderful people. They saved his life and thankfully he is better now. We often talk about his Senior Nurse who was a wonderful character, she brought a smile to our faces all the time, reassuring us, especially under the stress and shock of what DP went through.

Nursing has progressed massively these days, nurses are increasingly knowledgeable about the psychology of including relatives in the care regime etc. Yes, the negative stories get the oxygen of publicity but its up to us to balance out the perception by praising nurses for the wonderful things they do!

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