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Or is it just unusual where I live.

(43 Posts)
midnightisaplace Wed 10-Jul-13 21:21:54

Since the good weather began DS (3.8) has been playing out much more than usual. There are a group of about six children who are all within about a year of each other and they have a great time together.

We have always started DS bed time routine at 7 with a bath after which he goes straight to bed. DS hasn't been too keen on coming in from his friends over the last week or so but I have stuck to my guns and he goes to sleep straight away so I know he needs it.

The other six children were still out playing when I came into the house from a walk ten minutes ago at 9pm. Some of the parents have been looking at me lke I'm mad when I call Ds in at 7. Am I being unreasonable in making my DS stand out as different from his friends?

Apileofballyhoo Thu 11-Jul-13 15:31:51

Yes to later mornings - DS (5) sleeps 10-11 hours. We are up at 8 and he is usually asleep at about 9.30. He is sometimes playing out till close to 9.

ThingummyBob Thu 11-Jul-13 15:13:24

Am I the only one amused that Op who had her judgey pants hoiked up about other peoples bedtimes is now on the receiving end of the judgey pants brigade grin

OP, my dcs have always slept later if they stay up later. Even now age 10 I know some would be a bit hmm as he and all the kids on our street have been out until after 9 all week. He's in bed for ten and up at 8. Its plenty of sleep smile

CrispyFB Thu 11-Jul-13 15:03:34

A lot depends on when they get up though. I'm always hearing parents complain about their school age DC waking up at 5.30am or similar, and these are always the ones with the 7pm bedtimes.

Sometimes ours play [quietly, or they're straight indoors, they know the score] in the garden a little later, and I'm quite sure we probably get a few hmm from the neighbours, but ours don't get up until 8am as that's what works best for us with our morning routine.. up and out and no faffing. Plus DC2 (4) in particular really doesn't seem to need as much sleep as other children her age.

There's the old saying that I may have altered slightly about how you can lead a child to bed, but you can't make it sleep.. I'd far rather them running about in the garden tiring themselves out over them banging and crashing around upstairs making "craft" stuff aka piles of mess or whatever because they're bored and not tired.

doingthesplitz Thu 11-Jul-13 14:25:38

I wouldn't let a three year old play outside unsupervised. Even in a cul de sac you will have some cars driving down the road or backing out of drives, or the possibility of them straying off somewhere or another child lifting them up on to a wall that they then fall off or somesuch.

ThePowerof3 Thu 11-Jul-13 13:31:34

I can't imagine my 3 almost 4 year old out without me but again I don't live somewhere where it'd be possible anyway

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Wed 10-Jul-13 22:45:43

Yes and other, older children can't always be trusted with smaller ones. They can be quite mean at times. DH clearly remembers being made to stand on an ant hill as a small child by some older kids who were his "friends" this wasn't England either and the ants where he grew up bite hard.

I wouldn't let a child that young play out either, if something happened and they weren't being supervised by an adult, social services would, rightly, nail your ass to the wall for neglect. A child that age cannot judge hazards, or be trusted to not follow something that interests them.

FullOfChoc Wed 10-Jul-13 22:16:02

I work in a school and all day every day I watch worn out kids struggling to concentrate on the lesson.

7 pm sounds just right.

No way would my Ds been playing out at that age unless I was with him.......is there any adult supervision?

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Wed 10-Jul-13 22:15:41

Another one shocked at a three year old playing out. I also live in a cul de sac...I'd never let a toddler out though! My DDs go out to play but they are 8 and 5....the 5 year old is only allowed on our (open) lawn. I keep the front door wide open so I can see her.

Three is TINY!

PeriodMath Wed 10-Jul-13 22:15:28

I can't imagine my 3 yr old playing outdoors without me or another adult supervising. Not saying you shouldn't, just interesting that it's obviously normal for you but terrifying to me.

nenevomito Wed 10-Jul-13 22:12:20

Both DCs get called in at 7 and are in bed - usually asleep by 8.
Hooray!

katydid02 Wed 10-Jul-13 22:11:57

7pm is late enough for his age. My DC play out and they and their friends (age 7-11) all go in at six for dinner. DCs play in the garden until 8pm latest and then are in.
School holidays are different but that doesn't apply to you I guess.

LisasCat Wed 10-Jul-13 22:06:56

I've had exactly the same situation as you. I am quite strict about 7.30 bedtime on a school night and will ignore any cats bum faces when I break up playtime to bring mine indoors. I don't care what other people do for their children (although I do judge when they're off school the next day, 'poorly'), but I want mine to know that a good night's sleep is integral to feeling healthy and alert, and able to concentrate at school.

marriedinwhiteagain Wed 10-Jul-13 21:59:43

Ours never needed much sleep. But tea was at 5.30, bath time at 6.30, story at 7.30 and quiet time from then - often still up. Ds needed sleep from 10 ish as a litly and would goo through to 6 if we were lucky; dd needed to nbe down by 9-9.30 and would wake at 7ish.

No way would they have been playing out - ever at that sort of age. Or even older tbh.

Sparklysilversequins Wed 10-Jul-13 21:59:03

Well I think it's far too young and I would call it irresponsible, unless you have eyes on him constantly. He's no hope of getting himself out of a sticky situation at that age and it can happen so quickly.

Notcontent Wed 10-Jul-13 21:50:13

The vast majority of children do need more sleep than adults.
My 7 year old needs at least 10 hours sleep or she looks terrible and gets very cranky.
Even as a teenager I used to be in bed by 9 or 9.30.

LaQueen Wed 10-Jul-13 21:43:53

At 3.8 my DDs were always in bed for 7pm. They needed their sleep, and DH and I needed our evenings of peace and quiet.

Nowadays, at 10.5 and 9.5, our DDs are in bed for 8pm, and they can read for a few minutes, if they want. DD1 is always sleepy by 8pm, and rarely reads. DD2 usually reads, but she's always asleep by 8.30pm.

noisytoys Wed 10-Jul-13 21:40:32

We are on a very busy main road too. Even if we lived in a deserted street DCs would still go to bed at their bedtimes they need their sleep or they are very cranky the next day (and a few days after that until they catch up with their sleep)

PrincessScrumpy Wed 10-Jul-13 21:39:32

I do stick to bed time but dtds have only just gone quiet - i'm blaming the heat. Maybe if I let them play longer they'd go straight to sleep.
if they haven't got school it's not a massive issue - each to their own.

midnightisaplace Wed 10-Jul-13 21:38:59

Yes sparklysilversequins people do really let their three year olds play out!

Twattybollocks Wed 10-Jul-13 21:38:41

Not usual here. Kids here are all inside for 7.30 latest. There are a couple of older kids who I know don't go to bed until 9pm but their mother says 7.30 is late enough for them to be out playing on school nights, and it makes it so much easier when they all go in at the same time.
Summer hols are different tho, they play out till 8.30-9 if its light enough.

McNewPants2013 Wed 10-Jul-13 21:38:34

Dd aged 4 goes out the front when I am there, other wise she put the secure back garden.

maja00 Wed 10-Jul-13 21:38:28

My almost 3 year old is in bed by 8pm, but there are children (aged 6-10) playing out in the street til 9 or even 10pm shock

Sparklysilversequins Wed 10-Jul-13 21:36:08

Do people really let their three year olds play out? Can you see him OP?

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