To think not all men watch porn...?

(122 Posts)
MrsWolowitz Sat 06-Jul-13 18:22:04

I was chatting with some colleagues (makes and females) a few days ago when the topic of poem came up.

They were talking about watching it and what sort they liked. I said DH doesn't like porn and they all thought this was hilarious and said that he is lying to me.

I'm very broad minded sexually and more adventurous than DH. I don't like porn as I don't agree with the industry however this is a new opinion of mine (since being educated about the facts of porn on MN).

When DH and I got together I didn't have any opinions on porn and would have been happy for him to watch it.

I know DH doesn't like it. He masturbates often and that is fine with me just as he is fine with me masterbating it's just that neither of us happen to like porn.

AIBU in thinking that not ALL men watch porn and that their insistence that DH is obviously lying to me is actually quite rude?

MrsLion Sat 06-Jul-13 19:21:48

My dh is like yours Oxford. He also says he finds the women deeply unattractive, fake and it's embarrassing more than a turn on.

An attractive beach volleyball player in a bikini is much more likely to turn his head! (as would the male version for me)

Branleuse Sat 06-Jul-13 19:23:32

of course not all men watch it. There are many different kinds of men in the world.

Im pretty sure all men could get aroused by it or enjoy it, but I dont think all men watch it or seek it out

Branleuse Sat 06-Jul-13 19:24:43

my dp does quite like it every now and again though, which i dont really feel is any of my business

2andout Sat 06-Jul-13 19:33:16

My DH doesn't like poems or porn grin

mamapants Sat 06-Jul-13 19:35:02

YANBU.
I have very honest relationships with my OH and previous boyfriends. One of my exes was very into porn. But others not so much.
DP remembers a porn mag they used to hide in a tree house when he was young but that is it really.
He wondered if he was a teenager now that he would have seen a lot more but I think when we were teenagers you could get hold of it if you wanted.
My DP has admitted to some pretty embarassing stuff so I really don't see why he would lie about porn.

SplitHeadGirl Sat 06-Jul-13 19:43:27

My DH has no interest in it and never watches it...I would bet my life on it. He just isn't wired or geared that way - plus he is very aware of the exploitation involved. He also finds men who objectify women really sad and naff. It irks me when people assume our husbands are lying to us....like they know them better than we do, who LIVE with them???

MrsMook Sat 06-Jul-13 19:52:09

I don't believe DH has any interest in porn. He's not attracted to that kind of synthetic "beauty", he's never suggested anything inspired by porn. Again, I can't imagine him viewing at work. Never found a hint on the computer when doing techical things or searches. When he's crashed out on the sofa late at night, the TV will come on to Russia Today having dozed off during economic/ political news. He's not interested in page 3 or magazines. We've talked about it and I have no reason to believe he's lying.

He's joked about going to the strip-club in town, and I say (lightly) "OK see you later". He's not afraid of my reaction.

I have no interest in that kind of thing. Is it so rediculous that he wouldn't either?

He has a mild interest in children's poems at bedtime.

mamapants Sat 06-Jul-13 19:52:59

And thinking about it before we moved in together DP didn't have a tv or computer at home and his work is openplan so pretty sure he didn't watch it there.

Samu2 Sat 06-Jul-13 19:55:28

Mine doesn't.

In fact, it's a deal breaker for him and he hates the objectifying of women. He thinks men who go to strip clubs etc are sad and you won't even find him talking about someone sexually in a degrading way... example "look at the tits on her" kind of thing.

Of course people tell me he is lying hmm I know from how he got ribbed from friends that he has always been this way.

He had a mag when he was 14 years old and took one look and chucked it out.

I think it is stupid that people think all men watch porn or they are lying. It might be quite rare for men not to watch/read it but dh isn't the only man I know who has no interest in it.

JaffaMyCake Sat 06-Jul-13 20:25:28

I don't think all men watch porn, I think most ment watch porn.

My DH does, it doesn't bother me, if your DH doesn't, it doesn't bother me either. However if you tell me your DH doesn't I'd believe you and frankly it's none of my fucking business anyway.

curlew Sat 06-Jul-13 20:30:01

No, not all men watch porn. Because there are some men who don't like the idea of supporting an industry that exploits and degrades women. Some men aren't bothered about stuff like that. But many, thankfully , are.

valiumredhead Sat 06-Jul-13 20:31:52

I agree with caja, very odd posts about men and porn on MN imo.

WhatWouldBeyonceDo Sat 06-Jul-13 20:39:42

XH never watched it and never would, I'm 100% sure of that.
One XP watched tame porn a few times a week (long distance relationship)
One XP locked himself in the bathroom to wank to porn, for two hours, in the middle of the day shock he liked hardcore stuff and was a god awful shag because of it.

One of my female friends watches porn nearly everyday to masterbate to. I would watch tame girl on girl where no one gets hurt/humiliated etc. but nothing else.

Everyone is different.

Futterby Sat 06-Jul-13 20:46:15

YANBU. My DP doesn't watch porn. I have no problem, at all, with him watching porn and I've watched the occasional blue flick myself but he just can't be arsed with it. He knows, 100%, that I don't care whether he watches porn or not but still doesn't. He used to, though, but for some reason has kind of gone off it.

BelfastBloke Sat 06-Jul-13 20:47:59

While 'fake' and 'synthetic' performers might be the majority in porn, that doesn't mean that 'real' or 'mature' performers (including amateurs) are not available at the click of a button. There are hundreds of different categories to cater to all interests.

So the protests about not liking the fake look of the performers does not really matter in this internet age.

fuzzpig Sat 06-Jul-13 20:59:37

My DH hates it and hates the fact that lots of people assume all men watch it. He finds it insulting TBH, the underlying idea he's come across (arf) that you're not a real man if you don't use porn. Or even that you must be gay FFS

valiumredhead Sat 06-Jul-13 21:20:23

Mine too fuzz

SplitHeadGirl Sat 06-Jul-13 21:46:48

Yes, it is basically an insult to men, that they ALL watch porn and often lie too. Like a kind of depraved Borg.

Euclase Sat 06-Jul-13 22:23:43

YANBU - my DH doesn't like it either.

DonDrapersAltrEgoBigglesDraper Sat 06-Jul-13 22:32:51

Yes, apparently on MN - or more especially, the Stepford stronghold that is AIBU wink - all men either watch porn openly, or watch porn and lie about.

I'm sure plenty of men do watch porn and lie about it. But clearly there is a sizeable third subset of men who aren't into porn at all.

The fact that some women (and men, of course) find this so impossible to believe says more about them, than anything else. Imagine being so ingrained into porn culture and having such a, well, low opinion of men, that you find it impossible to believe that some men do not like it. confused

figurines96 Sat 06-Jul-13 22:39:59

My DH is a male feminist who abhors pornography. In fact he has chopped 3 inches off his penis and wears fake breasts to his job as a builder to make the other men there think about their attitude to women.

WorraLiberty Sat 06-Jul-13 22:41:35

Is his name 'Justin'? grin

exoticfruits Sat 06-Jul-13 22:44:04

It makes men sound pathetic - they don't all want to do anything. It is just as bad as saying that all men like watching football or all men would want to drive a fast car. They are all different.

morethanpotatoprints Sat 06-Jul-13 22:45:58

Some men like porn, some women like porn.
Some men and women like porn together.
Some men and women hate porn.

Some men like porn but won't admit it, because their oh doesn't like it.
Some men are go covert because their oh doesn't like it.

SplitHeadGirl Sat 06-Jul-13 22:47:50

Exotic, I often find it is MEN who say that all men watch porn, and the ones who say they don't are nothing more than liars. I can't get over the low opinion they seem to have of each other!! Or maybe they are just trying to justify watching women being exploited and degraded.

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