Note: Please bear in mind that whilst this topic does canvass opinions, it is not a fight club. You may disagree with other posters but we do ask you please to stick to our Talk Guidelines and to be civil. We don't allow personal attacks or troll-hunting. Do please report any. Thanks, MNHQ.

To think not all men watch porn...?

(122 Posts)
MrsWolowitz Sat 06-Jul-13 18:22:04

I was chatting with some colleagues (makes and females) a few days ago when the topic of poem came up.

They were talking about watching it and what sort they liked. I said DH doesn't like porn and they all thought this was hilarious and said that he is lying to me.

I'm very broad minded sexually and more adventurous than DH. I don't like porn as I don't agree with the industry however this is a new opinion of mine (since being educated about the facts of porn on MN).

When DH and I got together I didn't have any opinions on porn and would have been happy for him to watch it.

I know DH doesn't like it. He masturbates often and that is fine with me just as he is fine with me masterbating it's just that neither of us happen to like porn.

AIBU in thinking that not ALL men watch porn and that their insistence that DH is obviously lying to me is actually quite rude?

MrsWolowitz Sat 06-Jul-13 18:22:49

Males not makes and porn not poem!

Darn autocorrect!

Latara Sat 06-Jul-13 18:23:26

YANBU Some men hate porn; some women enjoy porn etc etc everyone's different.

BlameClaimProfit Sat 06-Jul-13 18:24:08

Not all men watch porn.

Some are blind.

CajaDeLaMemoria Sat 06-Jul-13 18:24:37

It's a bad place for this discussion.

Not all men watch porn. Some do. Some do and lie about it.

Mumsnet seems to have a lot of people who believe that all men do watch porn, and anyone who doesn't believe it is being lied too.

I can only imagine that it's a coping strategy - if you think all men secretly watch porn, you can't really object to it? I don't know, though.

I know a lot of men who don't watch porn. I know a lot who do. No reason to believe either are lying, and I know for certain they aren't in some cases.

It's an argument that baffles me.

MrsWolowitz Sat 06-Jul-13 18:26:56

It baffles me too.

That these people who barely know DH would presume to know him better than me by generalising him because he has a penis.

I like anal sex and DH isn't mad keen but will do it because I like it. Kinda screws up the gender stereotypes about that too I guess.

<Pimms related TMI>

TabithaStephens Sat 06-Jul-13 18:31:19

Not all men watch porn. But a lot do, and plenty of men say they don't but do.

StickEmUpPunk Sat 06-Jul-13 18:34:57

My DH doesn't watch porn either.
YANBU.

MrsWolowitz Sat 06-Jul-13 18:37:05

The thing is DH is just not into porn.

Never has been. He knows I wouldn't mind if he watched it and I know he wouldn't mind if I did (like I said, not my thing though so I won't be watching it).

DH is an honest guy and we have a healthy relationship and very good sex life and it annoyed me that these people would just assume that he is lying to me when he isn't.

Meh. Silly people.

maternitart Sat 06-Jul-13 18:37:50

LOL at poem autocorrect!

YANBU, my DH doesn't watch porn. He really doesn't.

YANBU. Some men watch porn, some men don't, some women watch porn, some women don't. A lot of people say they don't, and some of them probably do. People lie <channels House>

GiveMumABreak Sat 06-Jul-13 18:56:45

YANBU. My DH doesn't watch porn (and no, he's not lying about it)
But there do seem a lot if threads on MN about DH and DP with porn problems, so you may find a different reaction here. Perhaps it is one if those problems in a relationships that people come here for support, so it seems quite prevalent?

gnittinggnome Sat 06-Jul-13 18:56:53

My DH doesn't seem to be into porn - if I wanted to watch some with him, he'd probably be up for it, but it doesn't seem to cross his radar, and I utterly implicitly believe him when he says he doesn't watch it when he's alone.

Ignore what your colleagues think - you won't persuade them that they are being dense by making blanket assumptions, so don't let it worry you.

defineme Sat 06-Jul-13 19:04:23

Dh not arsed about it-he doesn't use computer at home, would be sacked at work if he did, hasn't got internet on phone(yes really!) and if there's a secret stash of magazines I would have found them cos I'm clear out queen!
He's 50 and says he grew up at a time when porn wasn't accessible and so you used your imagination!
He's also a very clever, educated, caring man and he has mentioned how tragic he finds the idea that young vulnerable people can get caught up in such an exploitative and tragic industry.
I do think it may be harder for younger people to imagine a world without porn.

everlong Sat 06-Jul-13 19:07:19

I think men lie about not watching it is more likely the truth. But what do I know.

My OH isn't into porn - mostly because he doesn't like 'sex noises', big tits, or fake looking women.

TylerHopkins Sat 06-Jul-13 19:09:24

I do think it may be harder for younger people to imagine a world without porn

I agree. Quite sad really.

catgirl1976 Sat 06-Jul-13 19:10:20

Oooh I've been on the Pimms as well MrsW - it's lovely. Though there's been no bum sex yet but the night is young

YANBU - Saying all men like anything is far too sweeping a generalisation to make. Like saying all women like shopping. I fecking hate it.

defineme Sat 06-Jul-13 19:13:13

But when exactly would my dh watch it everlong? He goes to bed first and nobody pays for the sex channel on my tv cos I read the bill. He has a £5 phone with no internet. He couldn't at work-he's a teacher! He is very very rarely home alone-I get home first and he's with me or kids rest of the time.

sameoldIggi Sat 06-Jul-13 19:13:50

I'm amazed a group of work colleagues in 2013 would discuss what kind of porn they liked.
Far too risky, never mind a bit bleugh.

MrsLion Sat 06-Jul-13 19:15:32

Yes on here you get a lot of posters insisting all men watch porn. They don't.
I have been in a long term term relationship with a porn watcher even though he thought he was being secretive. It's quite obvious.

I have had other partners who dabbled occasionally (more playboy style photographic stuff than vile dvds) and were open about it. Which tbh didn't actually concern me all that much.

Dh doesn't like or watch porn. I believe him, and its something I don't give a second thought to.

I have a girlfriend on the other hand, who likes porn and has been known to be the one to suggest going to strip clubs with her boyfriend.

Each to their own.

OxfordBags Sat 06-Jul-13 19:15:39

No, my Dh doesn't like porn either. He hates the fakeness of the bodies and the whole scenario, and he is disgusted by anything other than the most vanilla shenanigans. He also says he finds it hard to be aroused because he knows how exploitative most porn is (he's a male feminist). He likes looking at tame pics of pretty women in lingerie or with their tits out, but he doesn't go looking for them or buy mags or anything, just enjoys seeing them if he comes across them, just like I appreciate a pic of a hot guy in swimming trunks or whatever in a mag.

Also, don't know when he would watch it even if he did like it.

Signet2012 Sat 06-Jul-13 19:16:51

My dp doesn't to my knowledge and he has no reason to lie to me. When we have had honest discussions about it he says there isn't anything attractive about it, in his words the women are fake and it does nothing for him.

he just checks out any woman passing us with a nice arse

ouryve Sat 06-Jul-13 19:21:01

YANBU. DH CBA with it.

Ex liked it, though.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now