To long for a world free from cunting pigeons

(141 Posts)
HoneyDragon Tue 02-Jul-13 17:57:23

Because the dog







And they just it there staring.


Coo, coo, coo. All day.

Bark, coo, bark, coo.

I apologised to the neighbours, thankfully they haven't noticed the dog. They will when I run after the feathery bastards with a chain saw though.

TheCuntingPigeon Fri 05-Jul-13 19:05:58


limitedperiodonly Fri 05-Jul-13 19:10:38

Really, Gerund? I guess it would be squirty and there'd be a lot of it relative to the size of the creature.

I picked up my SIL's lovely dwarf rabbit and was covered in diarrhoea. She'd been feeding it unwisely though I'm not quite sure on what.

MillyStar Fri 05-Jul-13 19:19:22

Thank you for this thread!

I am utterly fed up tonight but I am now laughing my head off!

I also hate the cunts

TheCuntingPigeon Fri 05-Jul-13 19:21:29

flowersflowers flowers flowers tennis flowers flowers flowersflowers
flowersflowersflowers tennis tennis tennis flowersflowersflowers
flowersflowers tennistennistennistennistennisflowersflowersflowers

Coo coo coo coo coo

limited yes, there was a lot more of it than you'd expect, and it was... pungent. Mind you, handfuls of rabbit diarrhoea doesn't sound too good either.

More than 30 pigeons have been awarded the Dickin Medal, for their services in wartime:

Butterflywgs Fri 05-Jul-13 19:29:25

Pigeons can die.
So can seagulls.
Where I live on the south coast, we get both. I have a mild bird phobia - it's not fun feeling on edge every time I go to the shops.
I want to shoot people who feed them angry

HairpinsAndLacquer Fri 05-Jul-13 19:36:59

A pigeon scuppered my chances of going out with Handsome Andrew sad

limitedperiodonly Fri 05-Jul-13 19:37:34

wrt the Dickin Medal: I don't want to hurt animals but they just do what we want them to do, because they're just animals; not human.

It's why I think it's wrong for people to blame foxes for killing wholesale for fun. They do what they do and it's our responsibility to keep our pet rabbits and chickens secure and if we don't then that's our fault, not the fox.

Whenever I go past the smaltzy memorial to animals in WWI and II in Park Lane declaring 'they had no choice' I'm offended because animals don't have a choice, but neither did the humans who were conscripted or guilted into enlisting.

At least the animals didn't know what was going to happen.

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Fri 05-Jul-13 22:12:39

A friend was telling me, the two main wild country types of pigeon have different calls. One sounds like its saying "my toooooeeees are hur-ting". The other says "I don't. CARE"!
So not only do I have to put up with cunting pigeons fucking cooing, I then spend the rest of the day with "my toes are hurting" going round and round my fucking head like an earworm!

HoneyDragon Mon 08-Jul-13 17:15:04


I think I have had a breakthrough.

Two pigeons have been doing the pigeon ugly bumps in a noisy flappy fashion. In others words, fucking like only wood pigeons can fuck.

They are brazenly at it on the swing, and the dog did not bark. That's right people, the Labrador is taking the moral high ground and settled for glaring at the counting pigeons instead.

Go Team Labrador!!

HoneyDragon Mon 08-Jul-13 17:15:50

Cunting pigeons. Not counting.

greenhill Mon 08-Jul-13 17:52:19

Coo <looks around> COO <sad pigeon>

HoneyDragon Mon 08-Jul-13 17:59:26

Green hill? grin

limitedperiodonly Mon 08-Jul-13 18:26:49

There's a bird, not a pigeon, that goes: 'tweek-tweek-tweek', outside my bedroom window from 4am to 5am in the summer.

It's probably the grandson or great-grandson of the original bird but I want to kill it.

ZingWantsCake Tue 27-Aug-13 17:55:30

* Pidge*

You are a legend! cake

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now