Disturbing other house guests

(35 Posts)
ArabellaBeaumaris Sun 30-Jun-13 18:23:04

Stayed over at a friend's family home so that we could attend a big garden party there, as we live 200 miles away. About 15 other (young childless!) people ended up crashing, so there were multiple people sleeping in every room apart from the kitchen.

Dd2 had a lie in & got up at 6.35, I took her downstairs so she didn't wake DD1. We stayed in the kitchen, but dd2 doesn't have a mute button or volume control & I know she disturbed people, especially those in the dining room attached. When dd1 woke up & we had breakfasted & dressed we went out to the playground but I was wondering if I should have done more to keep the kids quiet? I could, I suppose, have given them breakfast & got them dressed in the garden.

Was IBU not going to great lengths to avoid disturbing others? DC are 5 & 21m.

Wylye Mon 01-Jul-13 15:43:23

YANBU at all - you were invited by the hosts, they knew your small ones would be up early, and so accepted that on behalf of everyone.
You did what you could in the circs to keep them away from the sleepers, which wasn't particularly convenient for you.
Short of gagging DD2 it was the best you could have done really!

Anyone grumbled would have got the hmm look from your hosts I'm sure.

MaxPepsi Mon 01-Jul-13 15:30:30

You did nothing wrong.

You were invited to stay by the owners of the house. No one, not even them really, have any cause to complain if your dd woke them.

To be honest, at the moment anything after 6am is a lie in for me, I'd have been very happy!

Notcontent Mon 01-Jul-13 14:03:03

I think you acted very reasonably!
It would be silly to suggest that you should take your children outside to feed and dress.

imademarion Mon 01-Jul-13 09:31:40

Chuckling at Dd2 had a lie in & got up at 6.35.

If nobody said anything to you, I think you can safely say you got away with it and officially not worry for another minute!

If you're posting because you have the impression you did something wrong, maybe mention you hope you didn't disturb anyone when you send your thank you note.

I think if the hosts' parents were down not long after you then you weren't out of order.

Portable DVD player genius idea and maybe take one next time?

kickassangel Mon 01-Jul-13 09:27:26

Friends stayed at our place once (pre planned) and were woken up by 3 yr old dd sitting on the bed at 6.30 saying "hello, lady what's your name?"

The moment I had heard her footsteps I got out of bed to intercept her, but was just a few moments too late.

You sleep over, you get what you're given.

Trills Mon 01-Jul-13 09:13:11

As a childless person who often finds the noise of children annoying - Y were NBU.

If you "end up crashing", you take what you get.

As long as the children were not actually climbing on the sleeping hungover people, you were fine.

bedhaven Mon 01-Jul-13 09:08:00

You may have been unreasonable had you opened the lounge door, let in the kids, closed the door and gone back to bed! You were totally considerate within the options open to you. Don't worry, even if they were disturbed if they haven't got kids I'm sure they'll catch up on sleep.

quoteunquote Mon 01-Jul-13 00:00:37

The only people allowed to complain or comment about children disturbing people in the morning, are people who can prove they never disturbed anyone when they were children.

I have attempted to prove this about myself, but my father, grandparents, aunts and uncle bore false witness and lied (I tell you) and told the court(my offspring) that I had indeed made noise before 9.30am

WafflyVersatile Sun 30-Jun-13 23:42:37

If you end up dossing at someone's house last minute along with 13 other people then you take what you get and roll with the punches.

you were a longstanding arrangement and not doing anything wrong.

SinisterSal Sun 30-Jun-13 23:16:11

Good Point PP

PurplePidjin Sun 30-Jun-13 21:45:12

Did the "young childless" others make efforts not to disturb your sleeping children while they argued and missed their train and upset their hosts' arrangements?

wink

SinisterSal Sun 30-Jun-13 21:33:47

Nah feck them. You said it first (childish!)
If you flop out in someone's house after a party you can't expect everything to be laid on to suit you.

They may whinge about it but they have every other morning to nurse their hangovers in complete self absorbtion. They'll be fine

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee Sun 30-Jun-13 21:27:12

Oh well, if you couldn't divide and conquor then you probably did the best thing, especially if the people she was most likely to have disturbed were the ones who decided to stay at the last minute...

I hate ever waking anyone up - so I don't know what I'd have done. Probably reluctantly woken DD1 & taken them both out, if I didn't think waking her up would wake the whole house.

But I don't think you did anything wrong.

Kat101 Sun 30-Jun-13 21:17:52

Yanbu. I don't suppose they kept the noise down once your kids were in bed for the evening, or in the unlikely event of the adults being awake first thing, would they have crept around so as not to disturb your kids. Doubt it. A bunch of unplanned hungover adults do not have priority over pre planned guests , regardless whether adults or children.

Yeah, you're worrying about nothing. If you got them out 45 min after DD2 woke up, then they probably would have gone back to sleep anyway.

littlewhitebag Sun 30-Jun-13 21:01:28

You had a long standing arrangement to stay and your friends knew you had kids. Not much you can do if they wake early and you can't expect them to be silent. I am sure the youngsters who were crashing were well able to sleep through anything if they are anything like my kids I really wouldn't give it another thought.

ArabellaBeaumaris Sun 30-Jun-13 20:36:41

not meaning to drip feed, but just realised that it was the people in the dining room that made the big difference. If they hadn't been there I would have taken in the kids into the dining room - where all the toys were from the previous day - & it's quite sound proofed from the rest of the house (not a traditional layout btw). Those people only stayed over because they had a big row & missed the last train grin

HotCrossPun Sun 30-Jun-13 20:35:57

I'm really, really surprised at all the people saying that you should have woken your other child 6:30am so you don't disturb all the drunk/hungover 'guests'.

HotCrossPun Sun 30-Jun-13 20:33:21

Of course YANBU.

You arranged to stay before hand, all the other people just crashed out.

If you fall asleep after a party at somebody's house you know that you aren't going to get the best nights sleep of your life, but that's the price you pay for not having to travel home late/getting free digs for the night. grin

DoJo Sun 30-Jun-13 20:27:52

I too would rather have let one child wake the other than disturb guests, but I suppose the noise of two wakeful children would probably have pervaded anyway.

ArabellaBeaumaris Sun 30-Jun-13 20:24:41

We were in the kitchen about 30mins before DD1 came down, my friend's parents came down then too & were pottering about sorting out the aftermath.

Couldn't do telly as people asleep in the living room, don't have a portable DVD player. Didn't stay up in the bedroom & sacrifice DD1's sleep as friend's granny was across the landing from us & walls were thin!

My kids were definitely welcome & our arrangement to stay was long standing. We went down the night before the party.

Viviennemary Sun 30-Jun-13 20:17:12

Most people would have expected a bit of peace for longer than 6.35. shock. I probably would have moaned about the noise. Still that's life and most people realise that little ones can be noisy.

I would have stayed in the bedroom with a portable DVD player. I'd rather disturb my other child than hungover guests.

Roshbegosh Sun 30-Jun-13 20:03:02

How long were you making noise in the kitchen before DD1 woke up? Was she the only one who got some peace? We're you in a bedroom with DCs and you left it to come down and wake up everyone who had been on floors / couches? Maybe you could have been more considerate but everyone would have expected a rubbish night's sleep anyway after a party where everyone ends up dossed down around the house.

formicadinosaur Sun 30-Jun-13 19:56:44

Quiet TV watching? Stories? Breakfast?

I have 4 kids. I would consider it rude to wake others though and would avoid doing so. Sleep is so precious in our house.

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