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To think its not normal to be able to suck air into your vagina and then fart it out?

(313 Posts)
VivaLeBeaver Mon 24-Jun-13 19:29:59

Dd can do this on demand. Not that I demand she does it but she thinks its hysterical.

And it's not just a little fanjo parp. It's like a trumpet which just keeps going and going. She's trying to play tunes now. Dh thinks she will be able to make a career out of it. hmm

I've told her she'll knacker her pelvic floor.

VivaLeBeaver Mon 24-Jun-13 21:17:36

Ok, according to Wikipedia queefing on purpose can kill you through an air embolism.

musickeepsmesane Mon 24-Jun-13 21:19:38

omg!!!!! Am I dead? Is MN Heaven? Sometimes I have to do cos it feels like....... kinda like needing a burp. Sort of.......

digerd Mon 24-Jun-13 21:22:50

I think< in the long distant past>, I did have a few now and again, but they were silent ones so could not have been able to play a tune. sad

I am intrigued with your DD's "flap" - surely she has 2 inner labia ?

I didn't know where my wee hole was until in my 20s, when I searched for itblush

garlicnutty Mon 24-Jun-13 21:24:24

Puffs or small amounts of air passed into the vaginal cavity during cunnilingus won't cause any known issues, however "forcing" or purposely blowing air at force into the vaginal cavity can cause an air embolism

I slightly suspect this doesn't mean allowing air intake, Viva, but some joker giving you a 'blow job'.

They would be likely to experience a knee-in-the-face job before any risk of embolism ...

garlicnutty Mon 24-Jun-13 21:25:50

omg!!!!! Am I dead? Is MN Heaven?

grin

Of course!

VivaLeBeaver Mon 24-Jun-13 21:29:19

I think dd's "flap" might be her clitoris........though I have no idea how she can raise it up and down.

Her top tip btw is not to try this when you need a wee. grin. She also told me to try and imagine weeing backwards when I was trying it.

Locketjuice Mon 24-Jun-13 21:29:44

I can smile

VivaLeBeaver Mon 24-Jun-13 21:30:11

I feel reassured that hopefully she won't get an air embolism then.

500internalerror Mon 24-Jun-13 21:34:51

I remember being able to do that, at a similar age! Nostalgia gringrin

NameThatTuna Mon 24-Jun-13 21:35:43

Right, cousin text back. She doesn't know the Emmerdale tune because she doesn't watch it but she can still do Billie Jean by Michael Jackson (I remember that now hmm) although she said it sounds a bit 'muffled'. She thinks she's too 'baggy' these days.

Waaaaay TMI.....

Lioninthesun Mon 24-Jun-13 21:36:20

Oh my! You'e taken me back 20 years to boarding school. Me and a friend used to hold our knees up on our backs (backs of legs on elbows if that makes sense?) and rock on our backs sucking in air #(fully clothed I should add!) and then do fanny farts. If I remember rightly she even did a stick man diagram in my leaving book grin
I have AMAZING pelvic floor muscles and I think this may actually help strengthen them as it is all muscle control. I wouldn't want to try it now though

Lioninthesun Mon 24-Jun-13 21:37:08

Backs of knees on crook of elbow maybe that should read?!

Euphemia Mon 24-Jun-13 21:38:15

Christ that beats the boys with their "hand under the armpit fart" trick hands down!

I do hope she's showing off her party piece at school. grin

The boys will be all 😧 😄 🙏

Bluestocking Mon 24-Jun-13 21:49:56

I used to be able to do this. And suck bath water in and squirt it out again. A week of back to back latent labour put paid to all those shenanigans but maybe if I did me blardy exercises I could do it again!

olidusUrsus Mon 24-Jun-13 21:55:28

I was going to mention the embolism thing too because I am terrified of them

I hope to God that my DD never learns to do this. And if she does, she can damn well keep it to herself grin

plieadianpony Mon 24-Jun-13 22:11:10

gosh. I remember doing this as a child. Me and my friend used to do it in front of the families poor live-in groom (who was a bloke and only about 18 at the time) who was really really embarrassed but had to be subjected to this....

Lj8893 Mon 24-Jun-13 23:46:42

I can't do this.

But when I was at college i was in a girl band and we called ourselves Queef.

OneLaundryBaskettoRuleThemAll Tue 25-Jun-13 00:19:26

God I love mumsnet.

ArtemisatBrauron Tue 25-Jun-13 07:59:17

When I was at school a girl in our group could do this and used to play tunes on request at sleepovers - Eastenders is clearly a queef classic as she played that one a lot too!! grin

I cannot do it, sadly, but I do have to avoid 1 yoga pose towards the end of my practice as it inevitably leads to blush a rather loud one, which in the quiet yoga studio is rather humiliating!

Lazyjaney Tue 25-Jun-13 08:17:43

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

KellyElly Tue 25-Jun-13 09:50:00

I used to do that as a teenager. I haven't tried for years so have no idea if I still can grin

LEMisdisappointed Tue 25-Jun-13 10:03:56

Am I the only one who is slightly uncomfortable with this thread? (Killjoy)

SamuelWestsMistress Tue 25-Jun-13 10:10:15

I knew a girl at school who did fanny farts. I mentioned this to DH years ago and he remembered this, because when I told him she was living in the same village as us he said "oh that's fanny farts McDonald isn't it?"

squeakytoy Tue 25-Jun-13 10:12:20

No LEM, you arent... confused

Latara Tue 25-Jun-13 10:20:37

The only person i know who can fanny fart has a fistula and is very embarrassed by it...

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