To think Jeremy Forrest's Parents have no place taking about his ex-Wife to the press.

(98 Posts)
CheshireDing Sun 23-Jun-13 10:51:07

The DM say today that they said "Emily was difficult to live with, they should never have married" and that they (the Parents) have maintained "dignity".

Clearly his marriage to Emily was obviously not perfect for him to have any kind of affair but why don't his Parents shut their mouths.

I honestly feel so sorry for Emily, her picture was in the papers in the beginning and now again today. Poor women, she's the one I feel sorry for.

flippinada Sun 23-Jun-13 18:59:29

They do indeed sm. Depressing isn't it.

Do we (those who see this as a clear case of grooming and abuse) belong to a silent majority or Vocal minority?

I can't work it out.

pussycatwillum Sun 23-Jun-13 19:07:52

Surely a paedophile is someone who wants to have sex with prepubescent children. He is a sex offender, yes, but not a paedophile.

scottishmummy Sun 23-Jun-13 19:08:08

I just think some folks are excitable,suggestible,and don't engage the brain

ilovesooty Sun 23-Jun-13 19:14:20

A comment underneath one of the Express articles refers to the girl as "manipulating this man into trashing his marriage vows". Words fail me.

I'd still describe him as a sex offender rather than a paedophile though.

flippinada Sun 23-Jun-13 19:15:03

Sauce I don't honestly know.

But I think the fact that this has been taken seriously and he's been prosecuted and jailed sends the message from the top down that it isn't acceptable.

pussycatwillum Sun 23-Jun-13 19:20:42

He should have discouraged any attention from her from the beginning. Even if she was "manipulating" him, as a teacher he should have made sure nothing happened.

He's a sex offender. I thought paedophile refers to an interest in pre pubescent children?

Yes, I take heart from the judges summing up and how quickly a unanimous jury found him guilty. They were the ones with the evidence in front of them. Also the fact they are perusing a third party influence.

However, dissenting voices thinking it's some kind of flipping love story have shocked me. It's so blatantly obviously wrong.

ilovesooty Sun 23-Jun-13 19:36:27

He was in a position of trust and will have been trained in safeguarding. He should certainly have known not to get involved in anything like this.

TheSmallClanger Sun 23-Jun-13 19:38:23

I think we should stick with "sex offender", as it is factually correct and saves on debate.

Teachers, especially younger ones like Forrest, have all been through formal and informal training in dealing with crushes and inappropriate behaviour from students. He would have known exactly what he needed to do (involve his line manager), but chose not to. He is entirely to blame for the situation, because he could have stopped it, at any time, and did not.

quoteunquote Sun 23-Jun-13 19:41:09

I'm difficult to live with, but funnily enough my husband doesn't see that as a reason to abduct children and rape them.

At no point has this man or his supporters taken in the enormity of the outcomes of his actions, clearly responsibility is not their strong point.

He will be out in less than two years, (half the sentence and time already served)

the TV celebrity who was let off his child abuse the other day because it was historic, because it happened a while ago, it's OK, not that those women had their childhood stolen, lives changed permanently. he got a pat on the head and sent home,

The people who had their lives destroyed by jimmy savile, and had a life time of enduring him leering out of screens at them, have now got the person they had to put their trust in and tell all the gory details to, reliving their ordeal now leering out of the big brother daily on TV, a blatant abuse of trust.

Other than a bit of shame which clearly wash off them, anyone who wishes to commit sexual abuse in this country has little in the way of inconvenience should they be held accountable.

Very few ever receive any sort of reasonable rehabilitation, any attempt to change their behaviour.

Write a letter,email (template and change slightly each week)and twitter to the home secretary and your local MP every week, explain you do not think that enough is been done, what you would like to be done, if everyone did this, victims of sexual assault would not be treated with contempt.

Once your childhood is over it is over, these people steal innocence, well being, lives, happiness.

We have to stop it.

flippinada Sun 23-Jun-13 19:41:22

Of course he should pussycat. But the impression given (inadvertently no doubt) by his family is of an immature, spoilt, overgrown child who has never had to take responsibility for his own mistakes. No doubt he knew that Mummy and Daddy would leap to the rescue as they always have done.

DuelingFanjo Sun 23-Jun-13 19:43:06

He was the one who proposed to her. Maye if he didn't like her he shouldn't have?

flippinada Sun 23-Jun-13 19:48:11

I e

wellthatsdoneit Sun 23-Jun-13 19:55:21

Forrest is quite clearly the product of his parents if their delusion is anything to go by. The golden boy whose behaviour has been excused and minimalised. They've done him no favours by enabling his behaviour and have raised a narcissistic boy-man incapable of taking responsibility for his actions. His wife was depressed and difficult to deal with was she? I'll bet she was, being married to that twerp and having his parents as inlaws.

flippinada Sun 23-Jun-13 19:56:07

Excuse the random, odd post there. Not sure what happened.

flippinada Sun 23-Jun-13 20:01:47

Yes, I suspect being married to him was probably the root cause of her "difficult and demanding" behaviour.

I have a feeling most of us would be difficult and demanding given the same circumstances.

Or perhaps he just couldn't cope with a mature, adult woman?

His parents have never said they feel he was right though have they? I haven't seen that if they have. What I've seen are parents and an older sister offering support to a no doubt dearly loved son and brother involved in a complex case. I don't see the need for their comments to be in the papers but if this were my child I would find it hard to read say, the vitriol on this thread, without offering my different view. It's interesting that so many of you are condemning the parents whilst at the same time absolutely exempting the wife.
Personally I think the reponsibility for the crime lies with the offender. Neither wife nor parents forced him to launch in to an intensely damaging sexual relationship with this girl.

hermioneweasley Sun 23-Jun-13 20:06:09

Quoteunquote - have written to Theresa May. I fail to understand how cracking down on sexual violence could not be a vote winner - who is going t come out against it?

hermioneweasley Sun 23-Jun-13 20:08:26

Northern - people are being critical of the parents because they are minimising what JF did, and by mentioning the irrelevant details that his wife was "difficult", they are implying that this was a contributing factor in his decision to abduct and sexually abuse a child. They haven't condemned him at all.

TheSmallClanger Sun 23-Jun-13 20:08:40

I think flippinada has it right. I know of a few men with control and related issues, who claim all of their failed relationships were due to "difficult and demanding" partners.

Hermione they've talked about what they think was involved. I disagree with them but I'm not impressed either to read ON THIS THREAD people blaming their parenting for his crime. That minimises it too don't you think?

Very few parents will ever condemn their child publicly. And a good job too really. We'd be a sorry species indeed if our parents didn't retain their love for us. I'm not going to condemn parents for still loving their son and wanting to protect him even when he's been convicted of a crime.

Can I blame them for blaming his wife and the school girl though?

flippinada Sun 23-Jun-13 20:27:52

I understand that his parents will want to defend him, of course they do. As you say, Northern no doubt they love him and it is a natural parental instinct to protect your child.

Now, having said that, I would have more sympathy for their view if they (or someone acting on their behalf) hadn't set up a fan page for their son (yes, it exists) on which young girls are being encouraged to write to JF in prison.

At least, I assume they support it as they have provided their address so letters can be sent to him as girls are not allowed to write to him directly.

This is publically available, by the way.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Sun 23-Jun-13 20:28:57

Northern

I get what you are saying, but really, they should shut up. They are displaying their own ignorance.

I don't think it's unreasonable, in the context of their words, to wonder why it is their son has a warped view of what constitutes a normal relationship. They think that their son's sexual attraction to several underage girls, and acting on it, is the fault of the cheated-on wife.

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