AIBU - the ultimate in wedding gifts.....we know MN loves a good wedding thread!!

(67 Posts)
holidaysarenice Fri 21-Jun-13 11:38:58

This made me laugh.
It starts off well, very funny.
The end is a little less believable tho.

m.thespec.com/news-story/3845206-have-your-say-about-the-firestorm-over-a-wedding-gift/

Just Googled 'doe party' and is what Wiki has to say http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stag_and_doe...

"In the United States, Stag and drag is held before the wedding of a couple as a big party so that they can collect money for wedding or honeymoon. Guests typically have to purchase a ticket. Unlike wedding reception or engagement, a stag and drag is not expected to be attended only by invited guest list. Anyone can attend - the more guests, the better."

Do your worst, MN! grin <Sharpens dagger>

Ooops. This is what Wikipedia had to say...

josephinebruce Fri 21-Jun-13 14:21:43

Is this real?

When I got married my ex and I had everything we needed so wanted to just ask people for donations to a charity of our choice (we were quite smugly virtuous in those days!). There was an almighty uproar amongst parents/relatives/friends so we gave in, spent a Saturday traipsing around Debenhams to find items for a wedding list. And then people gave us money :-)

Wish I'd kept it though instead of donating it to charity - would have helped towards the cost of the divorce lol.

That hamper sounded lovely. Much better than yet another toilet roll holder.....

curryeater Fri 21-Jun-13 14:22:20

As bad as each other.

1. horrible gift
2. horrible grabby response
3. stupidly engaging in text-battle

2 is really the worst, but 1 and 3 almost add up to as bad

chocoluvva Fri 21-Jun-13 14:33:07

grin

Nobody comes out of that story well. - guilty pleasure reading it - thanks for sharing OP.

we made a hamper once, we made it really nice and put loads of thought into it, went down like a lead balloon, not even a thankyou or any comment made about it

it was fro Italian relatives, who love food and we thought they would like an English themed hamper....

how wrong we where!

fedupofnamechanging Fri 21-Jun-13 14:51:48

I think a hamper is a great present.

I think the brides are awful - the idea that people get married in order to make money is abhorrent and complaining about a gift, even if they hate it, is so rude.

They have also lied about one of them being gluten intolerant, if they were eating non gluten free food in the restaurant, earlier. So they are both rude, and liars, who just wanted to claw back some money by returning the hamper.

The guest shouldn't have said what he did , but he was angry and people often say the most offensive thing they can think of, in anger, even though they don't mean what they have said.

FairPhyllis Fri 21-Jun-13 14:52:59

The couple are grabby and awful.

But the letter writer is not much better - he has that super precious anal American writing style ('actually I have done a lot of research on wedding etiquette') and made nasty swipes at the fact it was a civil partnership.

Hamper is an OK thing for a wedding, but I wouldn't have included the 'fun' items.

we thought a hamper would be a nice romantic gift, it was a lovely wicker one with all the plates glasses cutlery etc in too aswell as all the English themed food gifts

olidusUrsus Fri 21-Jun-13 14:59:17

Can't believe people are slagging off the hamper hmm completely not the point!

chocoluvva Fri 21-Jun-13 15:01:38

The hamper isn't the point, but it's quite an unusual gift for a wedding.

I think it's a lovely present.

Picturepuncture Fri 21-Jun-13 15:10:27

I don't think the hamper is that unusual for a wedding present, all sounds nice to me!

The brides behaviour is shock though!

I'm not a 'be grateful they deemed your wedding worthy of coming too' type person. I'm happy with a good gift list, don't mind a vouchers request and had a gift list at my wedding. But everyone know you don't complain... To someone's face about their gifts? Don't they? Blimey..

josephinebruce Fri 21-Jun-13 15:28:50

Who the hell bothers to research wedding etiquette???

curryeater Fri 21-Jun-13 15:46:40

No, the hamper is not the point, the point is the brides' horrible behaviour. I just wanted to moan about the hamper because I don't like sugar and if I got given a hamper, it had better be in a beautiful teak box that is a 4-poster bed or something (like the Finnish baby box) because if you don't eat sugar, the contents are usually junk. Biscuits, chutneys, jams, preserves - all junk sugar

drudgewithagrudge Fri 21-Jun-13 16:03:19

What is 'fluffy whip'? It sounds rather interesting.

curryeater Fri 21-Jun-13 16:12:14

I know, right?
Totally ungraciously, and not in the spirit at all, this is what I see when he describes the hamper:

wicker box with a hinged lid, - big bulky object that may or may not be to their taste and will now full up most of the cupboard under the stairs. Not useful for actual picnics, for which you need a nice coolbag / rucksack thing which is nice and light for carrying while holding children's hands.

filled with food items, most of them PC Black Label, - don't know what PC Black Label is, but not interested, as if it is a big brand is just licensed anyway, so has no bearing on whether the content is good

including: tri-color pasta, - seriously? A bag of pasta? of PASTA?

salsas, - ok may be interesting / flavourful. Judging from the rest of the stuff, probably just gimmicky and with fake starch filler. you can't beat a fresh salsa, which costs about £1.50 to make

Balsamic vinegar and Olive, - don't like balsamic vinegar, it is sugary, olive oil admittedly never goes amiss

Gourmet croutons, - TOAST? TOAST is a GIFT now?

Panko Breading, - no idea what this is but it sounds vile, and more junk carbs

Pesto, - yup probably useable but unthrilling

some baking ingredients, - like what, yet more cheap white flour?

Biscuits from Godiva - sugar, don't eat

and a few 'Fun' items like Marshmallow Fluff, Sour Patch Kids and Butterscotch sauce. - whatever the hell they are they sound utterly vile. Sitting in the cupboard till you move house and bin them vile.

If someone gave me that I would not complain but I would be looking in the local paper for an organisation that needs donations for a fete soon.

Finally - the only junk carb that I am interested in is totally missing - WOT NO BOOZE?

FeckOffCup Fri 21-Jun-13 16:20:28

The brides sound awful, it is beyond belief they would message someone to say their gift was too cheap and they "lost" $200 on the wedding meals, the point of a wedding meal is to provide hospitality to your guests not guilt trip them into wringing out their wallets for you. Horrible women.

TarkaTheOtter Fri 21-Jun-13 16:41:59

Awful brides...

But, given he works in the food industry, I would wonder how much of it was freebies. Wouldn't bother me though and is a lovely idea.

znaika Fri 21-Jun-13 16:42:31

I had a colleague's wife who was like this- fucking awful she was. She was having a wedding in a European country not her own so her guests would be paying to attend, and she spent the whole run up to the wedding totalling up who was coming and guestimating how much they would give and giving a running total of how much she would make. Grim

curry you really don't like the sound of the hamper do youwink

<makes note, if I ever get you on a mumsnet xmas thingy, DO NOT send a hamper!>

curryeater Fri 21-Jun-13 17:13:44

White - guess what? Don't want a hamper!
For some insane reason, curiosity compelled me to google marshallow fluff.
www.marshmallowfluff.com/pages/homepage.html

Seriously? Comic sans? need I say more?
Is this even edible?
I want to hear Bonsoir talking about this kind of stuff.

yeah I know you don't want a hamper !grin

ZenGardener Fri 21-Jun-13 21:23:58

Apparently PC is President's Choice which is a naicer version of a shops brand so along the lines of M&S or Waitrose but black label is their budget line.

I guess the equivalent of a bag of Essential Waitrose pasta.

It is a bit of a cheap present but if a friend gave me that I would still be grateful and maybe assume things were a bit tight.

However perhaps the guy has form for being a bit tight as he did get his employer to give them vouchers to his restaurant. Maybe he is just a bit of a dick in general.

Still tacky to ask for the receipt though.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Fri 21-Jun-13 21:44:43

I would love that hamper.

We got some bloody awful wedding presents but said thank you for each one as they were all sincerely given. I really hope that FIL's next door neighbour never found out that we used to bring out the silver globe butter dish as a comedy mint dispenser at the end of meals though....

olidusUrsus Fri 21-Jun-13 22:24:44

"No the hamper is not the point, but..."

No, that's my point, there are no buts. The hamper is not the point. End of. They were rude fecking cunts. They would have been rude fecking cunts whether or not they were given a ming vase or a jar of marmite because they were rude fecking cunts and they only wanted money.

So there.

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