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To say DS1 (6yrs) & DS2 (4yrs) can't see Man of Steel?

(64 Posts)
ttalloo Fri 21-Jun-13 07:16:28

DH really wants to take the boys to see Man of Steel, saying that it might be a 12A, but as they've already seen all 6 Star Wars films, all of Lord of the Rings, and the Hobbit, not to mention countless other crashbangwallop films, it shouldn't be too scary or difficult for them.

I take his point (they are a fairly bloodthirsty pair), but I'm still not comfortable with them seeing it - that 12A rating suggests to me that it's not a film for children as young as ours.

If you've seen it, please give me the benefit of your advice!

DesperatelySeekingSedatives Fri 21-Jun-13 11:19:42

5 year old DD went with her dad to see this movie on Sunday and loved it. She said it was "a tiny bit scary" when things jumped right out the screen what with it being in 3d but hasnt been majorly disturbed by it. She loved the old Superman movies and Star Wars too. It makes a refreshing change from her usual choices (bloody disney!)

You and your DH know your kids best tho. If you think they'll be too scared by it that's fair enough.

Oblomov Fri 21-Jun-13 11:28:51

I don't understand the objections to the Star Wars films.
Sparkle has said it is "shocking"
Mumofweeboys says it is not appropraite.

What are you basing those comemtns on?

They are mostly U, one PG, as Sarabi has said.
My ds1 has watched all the star wars and supeman films. Am trying to remmeber exactly how old, he was, but he was young.I sat with him.
FABULOUS. And I am sure I took him to the cinema for atleatst one showing. He was totally not frightened. Is hardly ever frightened, to be honest. And he LOVED it.

Ds1 is now 9 and we will definitaly be taking him to see Man of Steel.

I am baffled as to what the objections are. People are just so, "oh that's disgusting. bad parenting". when they either have no idea of content, or do not have children of that particular age.

Oblomov Fri 21-Jun-13 11:32:53

"war, torture, and abduction to a four year old"

Oh. Laughing.

My 4.8 year old is currently running around , darting in and out of the room, as I type, in ds1's tatty old superman cape, singing "man of steel. I can fly. Blow ice. I am the best superhero EVER"

DS (5) has seen the original star wars film but I'm not happy about letting him see the others. He hasn't seen any superhero films yet and hasn't asked so that's fine by me. Until they're 7 or 8 children can't tell fact from fiction so it's really up to the parents as to whether they want to let their child believe that all this sort of thing actually goes on.

I did a little test with DS and asked him to tell me whether things were real or not... bears, fairies, the gruffalo, crocodiles etc, and when he was 4 he told me all of those were real. He probably now believes that Darth Vader is real. I wouldn't let him watch Harry Potter for that reason... I wouldn't really want him thinking Voldemort is real as he's just too scary. Skewed logic there as I'm happy with Darth Vader... hmm. I also don't really want him acting out violent scenes from The Hulk or the Avengers in school!

I've had another think about what I wrote. The problem is about children believing that violence like they see is actually real and maybe acceptable. Superhero films show cartoon violence, but it's acted by real people so it blurs the lines between reality and fiction even further. If for instance a 5yr old lumps one of their friends with the same amount of violence as The Hulk, their little friend is not going to get up and laugh it off iyswim.

Oblomov Fri 21-Jun-13 11:58:19

Ahh. You see my boys were completely different. At 4, both my boys knew that it was just "made up, mummy". (in a kind of duur, we knew that, silly mummy way)
They knew that people didn't fly, blow ice, knew that darth vader was a story.
dh talked to ds1 about chewbacca etc. At length wink
How toy sory buzz's dad was taken from the luke skywalker/darth vader- dad scenario. Oh yeah said ds1, its exactly the same idea, daddy.

I'm just too much of a woos to risk it. It gives me the eebie jeebies that the cartoon goodies (Hulk, Iron Man etc) go around beating merry hell out of the baddies. I can just imagine DS saying 'Well Jack was being bad so I thumped him'. Not that he's violent in any way at all, but I can just picture it happening!

I love superhero films though... we watch them all once he's in bed :-)

Eastpoint Fri 21-Jun-13 12:17:50

Isn't the general premise that a 12A is suitable
for 8 & up with an adult? Why would you want your young child to be desensitized to violence? Surely there are enough U & PG films for very young children? If their father wants to see Man of Steel why doesn't he go with a friend after the children have gone to bed?

Eastpoint, desensitized to violence is beautifully put. I shall remember that phrase!

adeucalione Fri 21-Jun-13 13:02:57

Eastpoint - according to the British Board of Film Classification, 12a means that a child younger than 12 must be accompanied by an adult. It makes no judgement on how young is too young, and quite rightly leaves that up to the accompanying adult.

I'm surprised that people are concerned about young children watching films like Star Wars - it might not be right for your child, but it certainly isn't shocking or bad parenting as some have suggested : most 4-5yo children can tell the difference between fact and fiction, and are no more likely to think that it's OK to fight a villain with a lightsabre than it is to be naughty at school like Horrid Henry, Dennis the Menace or Just William.

TabithaStephens Fri 21-Jun-13 13:04:32

I don't think 4 year olds will enjoy the film. My neighbour took his 4 year old to see one of the spiderman films and he was terrified, they had to leave.

theoriginalandbestrookie Fri 21-Jun-13 13:07:00

I've seen it, no way would I bring my 7 year old to see it. First of all he would be bored rigid as it goes on for what feels like hours. Secondly it is very violent and seems to repeat the same scenes of violence a number of times. Thirdly it gave me a headache in 3D so likely to do the same to him.

I loved Superman when I was a child ( old gimmer) and remember going to see it when I was about 7, but it was a completely different film, with lots of colour and humour.

This is an interesting article about exposure to violence.

http://allpsych.com/journal/violentmedia.html

And this is a great site. The films (games whatever) are given an age appropriate rating by both adults and children. According to this DS (5) shouldn't have watched Star Wars until he was 7. Whoops.

http://www.commonsensemedia.org/

ParadiseChick Fri 21-Jun-13 14:07:22

Star wars are pg or u. Some people would have their littles watching nothing but octonauts until they are 15!

Ds is 7 and loved Man of Steel. 12A is more like a pg rating with the premise that the complexity of the story might be too much for some kids.

ParadiseChick Fri 21-Jun-13 14:12:55

You know thinking about this the one thing I can pick out of a film that has freaked my seven year old out was the screaming monkey in toy story three when he was 4.

He's a huge huge geek star wars and comic book fan any we've never let him watch a thing over a 12A.

MrsOakenshield Fri 21-Jun-13 14:17:35

well, I was one of very few voices that thought children of this kind of age shouldn't watch the Hobbit, or indeed the 2nd 2 LOTR films - but pretty much everyone else was fine with it. I will be the mean mum who doesn't let DD watch anything until she is within a year of the classification age! I do think that just because your child shows no external signs of violence in a film having affected them, doesn't mean it hasn't affected them - and the fact that they could sit through violent films without flinching does, to me, suggest they have become desensitized.

DS (5) totally freaked out watching the puffer fish episode of Octonauts and has never ever let us watch it again. Barnacles, Peso and Kwazi get swallowed by a whale, and Barnacles actually falls into the stomach acid. He was hysterical (hyperventilaing, sobbing and flinging himself onto the sofa face down) and truly believed they would all die and there would be no more Octonauts. That's why I believe under 7s don't know how to differenciate between fact and fiction. Sad really as I really want to watch that episode again. May have to watch it when he's in bed.

ReginaPhilangie Fri 21-Jun-13 14:54:24

We took dd1 and 2 (10 and 6) last weekend. DD1 loved it, but dd2 was really bored and drove me nuts with the "Is it finished yet", "Is it finished yet"? on repeat!

I've seen Man of Steel. Agree with the PPs who said your kids will probably be bored through it. It takes foreeeeever to get the Superman part, and then when it does, it's just fight after fight after fight after fight. It's really loud in the theaters too!

My 7 yo DSD has watched all of the Star Wars films with us. Which was fine, because we could discuss the story with her and remind her who the bad guys are - can't do that in the theater. We haven't done LOTR yet because we're pretty sure she'll be scared of the Ringwraiths and Uruk Hai - but this is a child who had nightmares about witches for years after seeing the Wizard of Oz.

fuzzpig Fri 21-Jun-13 15:04:25

YANBU, they are too young for 12A IMO. I would have thought 12A means maybe 9 or 10yo (my eldest is 6 though so not been an issue yet)

Oblomov Fri 21-Jun-13 17:10:11

I disagree with most of farewell figure's views.

I find it hard to beleive that any child hits another child and then claims that its because a cartoon character does it. And if they did, it would just be a very lame excuse. Becuase 4 yr olds and younger and older, know not to hit. They know.They know right and wrong.

And I do think 7 years olds can and should know the difference between fact and fiction. I have already said that my ds's do. So that crushes that arguemnt.

Empathy, is expected at 6. The recommended age is 6. Empathy, to know not to say what we mean, or comemnt that the lady is fat, even though she is, because we recognise at 6, how it would feel to us. Its funny when a 2 yr old says , rude things. But not expexted at 6.
Likewise 3 yr olds, may not differentiate between fact and fiction. But if the 6 ties in to empathy. then a 7 year old certianly should have got it.

I totally disagree on it being desensitising.
Many children get scared. of tv, films. My children are scared of nothing. Many children are scared. But remember, plenty are not. Some toddlers and scared of climbing. some are fearless. Why. Just thier personalities.

I was a fearless child . My children are too. I am not desensitised. I can watch "the Fall" and everyone on the thread was scared. But I was not. I did not flinch.

I disagree with alot of what has been said on this thread.

LittleBearPad Fri 21-Jun-13 17:31:31

Ooh the wicked witch of the west in the wizard of oz. She and her flying monkeys scared me for years when I was young.

MuddlingMackem Fri 21-Jun-13 17:33:16

I would say that it would be a bad idea to take children of that age to the cinema if you have a choice. If your DH can afford to go twice then it would be better for him to go first so that he can make an informed decision on whether or not it's suitable, or he sees it at the cinema and the children wait for the DVD.

I've just checked with my 6 year old DD. We took our children DS9 and DD6 to see it. We would have taken DS anyway, but we only took DD as well because we were given free tickets for the opening night as part of a group of 10 people. Otherwise DH would have gone first himself and vetted it. DS was fine, loved it, but DD found some bits scary and says she doesn't want to watch the DVD until she's a bit older.

We also took them to see the first Hobbit film. It was for DS's birthday in lieu of any kind of party or something with his friends. We never even thought to check the certificate beforehand as it was from a children's book. DD found a couple of parts of that very scary.

Admittedly, DD does find a lot of things scary that DS at the same age was totally blasé about, but I would be very wary of taking a 4 year old to Man of Steel.

adeucalione Fri 21-Jun-13 17:40:03

I feel that the key thing is that the film certificate allows parents to make their own judgement call - so a 12a means that anyone younger than 12 must be accompanied by an adult, but it is up to that adult to decide whether their 9,7 or 5 year old is likely to cope with the movie.

Reeling in horror because a parent allows her 5yo to watch Star Wars is nothing short of ridiculous - some will be scared and some will not, and one would hope that the parents knows their child best.

My DC all enjoyed the Star Wars movies, cuddled up on the sofa with me, and are healthy well adjusted teenagers now.

I would reserve the comments about desensitization to violence for those parents who allow their children to watch 18 cert movies, play adult computer games, watch tv in their rooms until midnight, have unsupervised access to the internet and so on.

TheFallenNinja Fri 21-Jun-13 17:48:16

So DH says yes and you say no. How will that pan out?

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