AIBU to think anyone calling a woman a slut is very disgusting?

(106 Posts)

It's just disgusting. Whether a man is calling a woman a slut, or another woman is - I think it's completely degrading and nasty.

I understand some women can be homewreckers and she may be a bitch, or a cow but am I the only one who thinks that calling someone a slut is just beyond disgusting?

You don't know what a woman has gone through. Perhaps she's a little bit flirty or has been with more men than most women, but you don't know why she feels that way. Even if she has 'stolen' someone away from a man, it shows her state of mind (messed up and not able to get her own man) so I honestly feel sorry for those types.

So AIBU to find calling someone a slut completely disgusting?

<waits to be told IABU and it's OK if I am>

SoniaGluck Thu 20-Jun-13 21:51:47

Oh, we've already vented our judgiest judgments on THAT wanker. It was no holds barred there. No-one gave a shit what we called HIM. Sheesh.

Sorry, what? I must have missed something, here. confused

aldiwhore Thu 20-Jun-13 21:52:45

Yes karmabeliever when I discovered a semi-friend's husband plays a game called 'pull the ugliest' on lad's nights out I wasn't particularly PC in my insults I used... skank, slut, grubby little **... I meant every single bloody one of them. When my 'actual' friend shagged a random bloke in the loos of a grotty pub (married friend) I used a few choice words to her face... none of them nice, most of them pretty horrible. That's why they're insults.

Bitch was too nice. Bitch CAN be used positively. Sometimes.

I judge sometimes. I try to only judge when I actually feel I have no choice. I hate being 'judgey' willy/fanny nilly/slappy.. but I reserve the right to have judgement, and sometimes, I need BAD WORDS.

SigmundFraude Thu 20-Jun-13 21:55:03

'Sorry, what? I must have missed something, here'

Sorry, 'he's' a theoretical bloke.

MalcolmTuckersMum Thu 20-Jun-13 21:55:43

Jovial? Well I've never connected either insulting someone or being insulted with being fucking jovial.
I'm afraid you're beginning to sound a bit unhinged OP. Obviously that's in an entirely freaking jovial way so, you know, no offence. ffs.

MalenkyRusskyDrakonchik Thu 20-Jun-13 21:56:23

Tut tut.

Blokes are very practical, Sig, it's women who're theoretical. And emotional.

Or wait, whut?

BegoniaBampot Thu 20-Jun-13 21:56:47

I don't like people to just casually refer to women as sluts because of their dress or if they have casual sex etc. But I would probably call a woman a slut and much worse if I found out she was having it off with my husband as I would obviously be upset. Think it depends.

MalcolmTuckersMum Thu 20-Jun-13 21:58:42

I wonder if a name change might be in the offing. I'm getting rather tired of Malcolm. Perhaps JovialCunt might do the trick. Yes, it's growing on me....... grin

Branleuse Thu 20-Jun-13 22:00:35

its supposed to be degrading and offensive and nasty. Thats what insults are.

HerrenaHarridan Thu 20-Jun-13 22:00:37

Whoops op! Your bad wording at the beginning has lost you this but I think I see what you were getting at.

Fwiw, I was a slut in my younger days, it was fucking brilliant! No shame here.

Harridan is a much better word though grin

Alisvolatpropiis Thu 20-Jun-13 22:01:10

Yanbu - it is degrading,but usually that is the exact point when people use the word. They never mean it to be anything other than that.

Men get called dickheads/wankers in the same contexts women get called bitches/cows. Men can "bitch" too.

Name calling is unpleasant but happens nonetheless.

aldiwhore Thu 20-Jun-13 22:03:08

Malcolm my brother would view being called a jovial cunt as a massive compliment. Reserving my judgement on his nature, he has a right not to be offended.

If I called someone a bitch and meant it in the way that is inoffensive to me, and they were massively insulted, I would apologise and not repeat the term again with that person. Likewise, if someone calls me a cunt and it deeply offends me, if they apologised I would forgive.

For me, that's the only way to actually get over the problem of offense and random letters and meaning. If you know something offends me, don't bloody do it, if you don't know, you will soon enough.

MorrisZapp Thu 20-Jun-13 22:04:26

Sigmund, what words do you use to describe men who shag other men's wives?

WorraLiberty Thu 20-Jun-13 22:04:57

Thing is, I think slut is badly misused. It used to mean a woman who didn't clean her house

Yes! I nearly died when my ex MIL declared that her Grandmother was 'such a slut' shock grin

Malcolm That's ok as long as you're only joking, I don't take offence. Between friends you can joke about whatever you like as long as you know you aren't going to upset eachother.

I bow to your new nn it sounds good.

Not that I like the c word, but it has a jovial tune to it :D

Oh, what about harlot? grin

I must confess in that context I used to be quite a bit of a slut.

I am a lot more house proud these days, though. smile

MalcolmTuckersMum Thu 20-Jun-13 22:07:33

aldi - I think I would like your brother!

I am an unreconstructed slut. Housework is one of the worst dark arts in my opinion and I'm shit at it anyway. I'm happy to be called a slut in that context. In my younger days I was a slut in all manner of contexts. Again, happy to own it grin

tootdelafruit Thu 20-Jun-13 22:10:39

" I have the (if you see it as this) misfortune of having some cousins/OH's younger cousins on FB and they use the term slut a lot to insult people they don't like."

yes! this is what I had in my head when posting- I also have younger cousins and see it a lot on FB.

aldiwhore Thu 20-Jun-13 22:10:39

I'm a harlot when I want something.

I'm a harridan when I don't get it.

I'm probably spoilt, I do a mean tantrum.

But so does my DH... all in good humour of course. Playful.

In 15 years I don't think we've ever actually insulted each other and meant it... we've insulted each other unintentionally plenty of times, we apologise, and move on.

I'd rather be a whore in the kitchen than the bedroom. I'm an utter UTTER bastard if I lose at scrabble. I'm a bitch when I feel like it, and an utter knob occasionally too.

I think I was a complete cock once or twice too.

But if you don't know me, I'd question your wording...

SigmundFraude Thu 20-Jun-13 22:10:42

'Blokes are very practical, Sig, it's women who're theoretical. And emotional.'

Are you going to emducate me MRD, 'cos I do love you pointing out my stoopid. And I know you do too grin

MalenkyRusskyDrakonchik Thu 20-Jun-13 22:11:09

It's true. smile

aldiwhore Thu 20-Jun-13 22:12:19

Malcolm please have him... in every sense of the word.

Do you like fishing? Do you dream of living on a boat that's like a shit caravan but goes up and down?

Please... you'd make him very happy grin

MalcolmTuckersMum Thu 20-Jun-13 22:12:53

I don't like to lose at Scrabble either aldi grin

velvetspoon Thu 20-Jun-13 22:13:18

I find it upsetting how acceptable it is to use derogatory terms like this towards women based on their style of dress or apparent sexual activity. If anything it's getting worse rather than better, I see teenagers using these words against each other, and adults, on a daily basis.

There is still a massive double standard, when boys/men are called man whores, or whatever the nom du jour is, it's in a bit of an indulgent way.

Whereas when it's directed at women there's usually some vitriol, which I fail to see any justification for. So a woman wears revealing clothes? Doesn't make her more sexually available than anyone else. If a woman chooses to have regular casual sex (perhaps because of a lack of men worth having a relationship with), that harms no-one. I fail to see any need for name-calling in either situation.

Sheshelob Thu 20-Jun-13 22:13:19

"Whore" is my bug bear, particularly because I have female friends who think it is vey funny to call each other it.

It makes me want to eat my own fingers.

In terms of what to call people who engage in extra-marital interfacing, "Tart", pronounced in a West Country accent. Both sides of the gender divides. TaRt.

MalcolmTuckersMum Thu 20-Jun-13 22:14:02

I dream of having a man that can fish! DH paddles. In a slightly effeminate way! Real men fish so yeah, I'll take him.

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