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to think this is a breach of softplay etiquette?

(71 Posts)
megsmouse Wed 12-Jun-13 22:42:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TwasBrillig Thu 13-Jun-13 00:21:19

So she was cross you pushed in. Fair enough?

DoJo Thu 13-Jun-13 00:38:49

Sounds fair enough to me - the children waiting are someone else's children, and her child wants to play with her. I probably wouldn't have tried to kick you off (what did that actually entail? Just asking if you were done or actively trying to coerce you into giving up your car?) and if we were the last two in the queue and there was only one car left, then I would have waited and let the next single rider go. But if you were the last to get in the car because you assumed she wouldn't want one and then she did, then she was right to try and oust you. The fact that the guy asked her not to do it again was probably more to do with your reaction than any hard and fast rule.

megsmouse Thu 13-Jun-13 01:01:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

megsmouse Thu 13-Jun-13 01:03:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Its only innappropriate if you are drinking md 20/20 and seeing if the guy in charge will meet you afterwards.

Bessie123 Thu 13-Jun-13 01:16:59

I think it's a bit weird that an adult would go in a car if there are children waiting. If there is nobody else in the cars a adult might go in to play with the child but if there are other kids they can play I the cars. it is also a bit selfish for an adult and a child to use 2 cars when there are kids waiting.

Bessie123 Thu 13-Jun-13 01:18:58

Hmm, my post did make sense before my iPad edited it...

TwasBrillig Thu 13-Jun-13 05:52:45

But you accepted she could have been in front of you in the queue so it sounded like you pushed in in front of her.

I might be reading it wrong though!

ButchCassidy Thu 13-Jun-13 06:21:55

YABU
If she was in front of you queuing and her child wanted her to have a car to play bumps then why shouldn't she have a car?
Your child would still have had a turn after a short wait.

DoJo Thu 13-Jun-13 08:44:41

What I think is a bit sad about this thread is the 'sod other children mine come first attitude', nonetheless I will accept that my view isn't shared.

I'm not sure I understand your sadness - of course people prioritise their own children over others, just like those other children's parents prioritise them. It's not as if the other children wouldn't have got a go in the end, so having to wait one more turn isn't exactly cruelty. I think the fact that the place charges for parents to enter also adds to the idea that they are paying to use the facilities too, so I would be more inclined to ride solo under those circumstances than I would if I had just paid for a child to enter. If I had taken my child out anywhere and paid for both of us then I would expect us both to be able to use the facilities in the way that we wanted to, and if that meant doing something together when we had queued for it, then so be it.

DeWe Thu 13-Jun-13 09:54:04

I would say that it would have been okay for her to come and say "would you mind waiting as my dc really wanted to race against me?"
I'd probably say yes in that situation.

If she told me I had to get out, I would have stayed put on the basis possesssion is 9/10ths of the law.
If it had really bothered her, and the assistants were fine with her going in on her own, then she could have taken her children out, and asked the assistant if she could wait until the next ride and all go on together.

It's a bit like at legoland if your dc wants, say, to go at the front of the ride, it is okay to say to the person in charge, "can we wait for the next ride as we want to sit there?" and they'll let you. It wouldn't be okay to march up to the person in front and demand they get out because you want to sit there.

SavoyCabbage Thu 13-Jun-13 10:09:01

Yabu. Her child wanted to play with her mother in a different way from the way your child wanted to play with you. And that's ok. She should put her child's needs in front of your child's needs.

OutragedFromLeeds Thu 13-Jun-13 13:53:15

'What I think is a bit sad about this thread is the 'sod other children mine come first attitude''

but that's exactly your attitude OP! Sod the kids who want to race against their mum, sod them enjoying their turn on the bumper cars, my PFB DD will have to wait an extra three, yes THREE whole minutes for her turn shock.

<cries into a hanky>

megsmouse Thu 13-Jun-13 14:51:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

megsmouse Thu 13-Jun-13 14:52:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OutragedFromLeeds Thu 13-Jun-13 14:57:02

I understand what you're saying, I just disagree.

The other children can't have been that much older. They weren't 15 year olds. They were also little kids wanting to play. They waited their turn. Giving up their turn (with their mother) is not common courtesy. Unless your DD has some additional needs which mean she can't wait, then I disagree that there was any need for them to let you go first.

Queuing up and waiting your turn (which is what they did) is sharing btw!

megsmouse Thu 13-Jun-13 15:10:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TwasBrillig Thu 13-Jun-13 15:40:55

I understand and disagree too! I was a bit like this when my first child was very small at toddler groups -there comes a time when your child is big enough to do things without you being directly with them.

TwasBrillig Thu 13-Jun-13 15:43:43

They were sharing appropriately for the situation though.They would have queued, got in, ice their turn and then it would have been your turn! That's appropriate turn taking. Not sharing would have been not coming off after a turn, or going in front of someone waiting or pushing in etc. suspect we will just disagree.

HenriettaPye Thu 13-Jun-13 15:48:31

It's a place to have fun- these kids wanted to have fun racing their mum on the cars, you say the cars are big enough for an adult so she was perfectly entitled to go on it!

OutragedFromLeeds Thu 13-Jun-13 16:46:25

They were sharing! <bangs head on wall>

I could see your point if we were talking about cake or something that there is a finite number of, but there was no limit on turns on the bumper cars. The mum having a go did not result in anyone not getting a turn, they just had to wait longer.

It's you arguing that your DD shouldn't have to share with adults or any children that are older than her! The mum was going in the bumper car and then you and your DD; that's turn taking and SHARING.

kungfupannda Thu 13-Jun-13 16:51:47

Gambados.

My money's on the Chelsea one.

[nods wisely and remembers the hell of uber-posh soft play]

Assuming it is Gambados, you are probably not being unreasonable. They have a few cars and they open the gate and the next 5 or 6 children go through together and choose a car, and then they close the gate. The attendant presumably let the right number of people through, based on every adult sharing with a child. If she'd got to a car first that would be one thing, but she shouldn't have tried to evict a child who was already in one. No-one would have realised she wanted a car on her own.

kungfupannda Thu 13-Jun-13 16:53:28

So you are not being unreasonable about the scenario that actually happened, but you are being unreasonable to think that she shouldn't have used a car on her own at all.

megsmouse Thu 13-Jun-13 18:24:38

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SueDoku Thu 13-Jun-13 19:11:53

I am shock shock at the idea of adults, adults going to a children's soft play area and then wanting to play on the equipment while children have to stand and watch....!!! FFS the whole place is for children not 'big children' - if you want to play on adult bumper cars go to the fair.... confused

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