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AIBU?

To still be struggling with the bra situation - warning - saga!

81 replies

pouffepants · 22/05/2013 19:13

IABVVU since there have been at least 8 billion bra threads, but I'm clearly far too thick to get it right.

I watched with interest when the bra interventions began. I often heard it quoted that most women wear the wrong bra size, and I assumed I was one of them. This is due to a bra fitter making me cry as a pregnant teenager in mothercare, telling me I would have saggy tits forever since I was wearing a 'c' cup, and she said I only needed a 'b' cup even when feeding. So I've spent years ashamedly grabbing sizes c/d over the years convinced that a) people would laugh their socks off if they saw, and b) I'd just have to put up with saggy tits since I couldn't bear to wear anything smaller.

So when it started on here, I thought 'what the hell' and got the tape measure out. 32' under and 39' over. Wtf?? That's 32f! So someone said to lean over to do it. That's something I always avoid since my boobs seem to go long and sausagey when I do that, the reason I was convinced they were saggy, just seem completely empty. Well that was even sillier! Measurement 41' = 32g.

So I ignored that one and went to m&s and bought some 32fs which to my astonishment seemed to fit. All good. But within a couple of weeks I realised that I had 4-boob again. Weird! So I decided to measure myself again. But when I leaned over, I found the weirdest thing, my boobs no longer went sausagey, they were quite full. And measured 43'. Surely boobs don't just grow to the space available? Bit scary really! And another realisation, my boobs aren't saggy at all, they're pretty upright really when I stand up, it was only ever when I leant over, that I thought they were saggy. There's not much of a crease underneath at all.

So i went back to m&s (only place local) but couldn't find anything I was happy with the fit of. So I followed the advice on here and went to bravissimo. Had to make a day of it, since it's miles away.

The fitter agreed that my bra was a bit small, and put me in 32ff. I did query the amount of armpit fat, but she said that was normal, and then i felt so self conscious that I went along with it. I hate shopping at the best of times and since I was so far from home I felt pressured to buy (by myself not them), so I bought 3 bras including a sports one.

£90 down, I now realise that my bras don't pass the points put on here. The back doesn't ride up, but I can pull it quite far from my body even on the tightest hook, which I'm wearing it on. There's definitely overspillage of boob at the top, and I think under the arms, though that may be just my fatness.

I feel like I should have tried lots of different sizes, but the fitter kept telling me they fit great, and I didn't argue. She kept saying about scooping, but then showed me just a little gentle nudge to get them in place, I felt far too silly to do a major tit yank, like I've been instructed here.

So of course I've cut the labels off, they're never going to accept them back now are they, even though I've only had them 3 days. And the whole point of going was so I would once and for all know my size, so I could buy on the internet in future, and not have to trek about all over the place for bras, and I don't even know that! And I can't afford any for ages now!

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diddl · 22/05/2013 19:19

Shame you can't sew the labels back in!!

Sounds as if you need to go down a band size-which might put you up another cup size also!

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pouffepants · 22/05/2013 19:21

Not the actual labels, just the plastic tags from the shop.

And I don't understand why thy band is so stretchable, when I do actually measure 32. i'm wearing a 32 band, surely that should be right? Why would I need a 30'?

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 22/05/2013 19:35

Do you have your receipt?
I would take them back and ask to see a manager, and explain you were measured by a member of staff and advised to buy that size. Believing what you had been told you cut the labels off.
But when putting them on at home you realised they don't really fit properly. Then ask very nicely if you could possibly have an exchange for ones that do fit.
If you are calm and polite they may be happy to exchange them.

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 22/05/2013 19:38

As for the band, it could just be the fabric is more stretchy than the average bra fabric - I have found that with my current bra.

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sparkle12mar08 · 22/05/2013 19:40

Bravissimo are really good at customer service. Honestly, fish the card labels out of the bin if they're clean enough, and take them back with your reciept, explain how you feel the fitting wasn't quite right, and ask for a second opinion and an exchange.

As to stretch, it's mostly to do with modern materials and fabrics. They're so, so much stretchier than stuff being used 15-20 years ago it's insane. I measure 31.5, mostly wear a 30 band, and even some 28's if a make/model is particularly bad for stretch (Curvy Kate, I'm looking at you!)

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pouffepants · 22/05/2013 19:43

Maybe but like I say, it's miles away.

It cost us £25 to go by train, although tied it in with doing other stuff in Brighton. I just haven't got the time or money to go again.

Maybe they'll agree to exchange by post? But then I'd have to be really confident of what size I want without trying on. By going by what has been said on here, it could be 32g, 32gg, 30g, 30gg or 30h. I just don't know any more.

the fitter told me 32g was too big, but she didn't do any scooping really, which I definitely think helps for getting rid of lumps and bumps, and getting a better fit.

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 22/05/2013 19:43

Wonderbra have started to be more stretchy too! Glares at designers for Wonderbra

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 22/05/2013 19:44

Did not mean to make that bold, sorry.

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StatisticallyChallenged · 22/05/2013 19:44

Definitely give Bravissimo a call - they are exceptionally good at returning bras if they have got the fit wrong even when they have been worn.

Which bras did you get - as others have highlighted some band are stretchier than others.

I have experienced the slightly shy fitters when it comes to scooping - I no longer have any shame and just drag them in as I now know that I seem to "grow" about 1-2 cup sizes when everything is in the bra.

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chelsbells · 22/05/2013 19:44

Bravissimo will accept the bras back! I had a similar problem.. Was measured in store, took it home, took the labels off, wore it a few times and found it was digging in on my back. Went back to the store, explained that it was clearly too small in the back and they re-fitted me and exchanged the bra completely hassle free!! Definitely take them back, it's a lot of money to waste on a bra than you can never wear! Hope you have some better luck next time Smile

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StatisticallyChallenged · 22/05/2013 19:46

OK, if you scoop, vigorously, how does the bra look and feel? Don't try to tuck any quad boob back in - more trying to work out how much of it there is to get an idea of how many extra cups you need.

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domesticslattern · 22/05/2013 19:51

I went to Bravissimo at the weekend and the fitter said to come back if I had any concerns and they would refit me and take bras back. I heart Bravissimo.
Obvious stuff- have you tried playing around with the straps and are you wearing it on the loosest hook? It seems very odd if none of the three fit....

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HerrenaHarridan · 22/05/2013 19:51

After the bra intervention threads I started buying on eBay.

Sell the ones you've got as unworn, and look for harmony lingerie. She sells new as will allow you to try them and return them if they are not right.

If you are careful unwrapping them you an just Sellotape the package back together and return post it free if charge.

She also does mental sizes. Smile She's probably not the only one but I have dealt with her lots since and she has seen very patient about me returning items several times Blush

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pouffepants · 22/05/2013 19:53

I wouldn't say there's a HUGE amount of quad boob, but it's defo not a smooth line, and for that money I want to get it right this time. And some bulging under the arms.

Both main bras are Panache.

Also confused by the sports bra. I just bought the one that she fitted me in, since i had no idea how it should fit, and now found out it's actually 34f, which she didn't mention. Wore it for basketball last night, having never worn a sports bra before and found it felt less supportive feeling than all my old normal bras I usually wear. It just feels like the top of a swimming costume. It doesn't bother me that much, since I've never experienced discomfort in exercise, just felt like I should have one really.

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 22/05/2013 19:59

Maybe ring the store and discuss the issues with a manager and see what they say. £90 is a lot to be out of pocket.
They may be happy to come to some sort of arrangement for exchange.

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StatisticallyChallenged · 22/05/2013 20:14

I wouldn't be put off by the sports bra being a bigger back size - that is par for the course as they are generally much smaller in the back. I always have to go up a size. I would expect it to be supportive though. Have you tried popping it on and bouncing in front of a mirror to see if it actually limits the bouncing? My Freya sports bra doesn't feel like it's doing much but there is a definite difference.

If you have both slight quad boob and underarm bulge it could be as much as 2 cup sizes you need to go up. IME, one cup size two small is relatively subtle - more of a slightly squished feeling and maybe a little bumping when breathing in.

TBH, it sounds like you've been unlucky and has a bad fitting. It does happen, even with the best shops but they are very good at sorting errors. Actually, come to think of it I recollect someone on the bra threads who had this issue and lived away from the store. She called the main office and I am pretty sure she spoke to a good fitter who sent her out a selection of the "best options" based on their conversation and she just sent the others back.

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pouffepants · 22/05/2013 20:24

Ooh that sounds good!

Re the sports bra, I'm not sure, I don't really bounce much anyway. Even in a normal badly fitting bra. So I guess maybe that's why I don't notice a difference. I feel ridiculous having bought one, when I don't even need one, but I thought I prob did, since I seem to be a silly size bra, even though I don't look it. I can run around without a bra no prob.

The other night I needed something from the shop 15 mins before it shut, when I'd already taken my bra off. So put on a thick jumper so you couldn't tell and ran to the shop 10 mins away, and back without a bra. I don't get uncomfy at all, is that normal?

One reason I bought a sports bra, is because I'm fed up of washing my other ones all the time after doing sport in them and getting all sweaty. I thought the material might be batter, and I think it prob is.

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pouffepants · 22/05/2013 20:26

Better, not batter! That would be a poor material for bras!

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pinkstinks · 22/05/2013 20:31

I spent a shit load of money getting to my nearest bravissimo last weekend and am really disappointed, I was expecting the holy grail! :(

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StatisticallyChallenged · 22/05/2013 20:33

Very envious of the lack of bouncing!

Can we help PinkStinks?

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Meerkatwhiskers · 22/05/2013 20:34

mmm I didn't really rate bravissimo tbh. Went to Brighton too as live nearby. Maybe I should give them another go but i'm not one for spending that much on bras. I only went as my friend wanted to go.

I self measured with the advice on here and after losing 4 stone and previously wearing a 38DD I am now wearing a 34G but i'm not 100% sure it's quite right still (i'm a student at the moment so on a budget).

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hophophippidtyhop · 22/05/2013 20:39

Often the fit is different between makes.I usually have freya, and had trouble getting a good fit this time. Tried panache but half a cup bigger as heard the fit was different and bingo! I have a panache Andorra on if that helps.

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pouffepants · 22/05/2013 20:41

This is one reason I'm so utterly baffled by the whole thing. My boobs don't look that big, they don't bounce and they mostly stay up on their own, despite thinking for years that they were saggy. So how the hell can they poss be a g/h cup?

And before anyone thinks about being jealous, I have an enormous wobbly belly and a face like the back of a bus.

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StatisticallyChallenged · 22/05/2013 20:46

Honestly, I'm a similar/slightly bigger size (roughly a 30HH/J) and most people would never guess they are that big. Mine do bounce sadly but I have lost and gained weight too many times I think

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nohalfmeasures · 22/05/2013 20:46

Since regular scooping these last few months I have gone up one full cup size. Now that nork tissue is in the right place I have lost that puffy roll just next to my armpits which used to remain there even when I took my bra off.
I think years of wearing the wrong size distorts everything & it has to be trained back into place
OP keep persevering. It's worth it in the end
My bras are all Debenhams.

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