to feel threatened by her?

(78 Posts)
waddlecakes Tue 21-May-13 16:27:43

Bit of a tough one. I've had a somewhat unsteady relationship with a man I'm mad about. It's been going on for 7-8 months and has been difficult as he has some mental health issues but things have been getting much better.

Last week he introduced me to one of his girl mates who he is very close to. We were at this event and the girl and I ended up alone in the bar - it turns out we were able to connect really deeply, and I really really liked her. She said that when he had told her he wanted to introduce her to me, she had expected to feel jealous, but having spoken to me she couldn't find it in her to feel anything negagtive towards me. The way things turned out we were having such a good time the two of us that we embarked on a pretty magical evening of swapping confidences, and we ditched my man and his other mates for a good 4 hours.

Sounds pretty perfect - except at one point she told me that she and my man had kissed ''once or twice'' before, but nothing else ever happened. It did send a pang through my heart...later on she said she'd had this intense dream about him the other night.

Arggh I don't know, I feel paranoid about it because I really got on with her amazingly well and I'm pretty sure if he was worried/had anything to hide he wouldn't have been cool with me wandering off with her for hours. At the same time though...she's a musician like him, I saw some scars on her wrists and she appears to be some sort of ''tortured soul''. It makes me feel insecure like I'm not interesting enough I suppose...sorry, I really just needed to get this out!

Loulybelle Thu 23-May-13 17:04:44

Errrrr....shes a twat, and obviously wants him, shes got a game going on, she sounds as fake as Katie Prices tits.

MalcolmTuckersMum Thu 23-May-13 17:12:36

What honey said up thread - someone over shares too soon (ridiculously too soon in this case) it is ALWAYS a huge red flag with bells on. And the bells are decorated with red flags. I can't see this ending well.

XiCi Thu 23-May-13 18:42:20

I agree with alexa upthread in that it sounds like you had both taken something and then overshared.

Also agree with others who have said that someone who confides in this way immediately is usually someone with either an agenda or problems and is best avoided

Your relationship sounds incredibly hard work for a very new relationship. It really shouldn't be that hard. Can you see yourself putting up with this sort of shit for 5 years, 10 years?

You sound like a lovely trusting person who is being taken for a bit of a ride by these two. Are you very young? And what happened to her living in a faraway city? She seems to be around a lot and encroaching on your life. I would be very cautious around her

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