AIBU to think DD2's school is being ridiculous

(41 Posts)
NeverBeenToMe Thu 16-May-13 12:19:38

Dd2 is in year 11. Working hard for exams etc. and starts study leave after Whit. She is a fairly quiet, studious girl. This morning she has been pulled out of an English lesson (exam is on Monday), told her skirt is too short and she has to wear trousers tomorrow. She has worn this skirt for WEEKS without any comments from anyone at school. And suddenly with six days left, they think I am going to buy her a pair of trousers??

Someone I work with (in education!) has suggested keeping her off until study leave starts, if I don't get a satisfactory conclusion from a conversation with the Head of Year - am quite tempted to do this and just have her study at home.

She was given a lecture on wearing suitable attire for work etc - but as far as I am concerned she has another five years in education - plenty of time to worry about work attire then!

SullenCrescent Thu 16-May-13 12:22:29

How short is her skirt?

ThingummyBob Thu 16-May-13 12:23:40

I'd call the HT and ask why a skirt she has worn for weeks is suddenly not good enough six days left at school.

Ask forcefully enough that she/he needs to provide you with a reasonable answer which there clearly isn't don't be fobbed off.

Tbh I'd send her in each day in the skirt if she's happy to do so. See what happens...

I really, really wouldn't have her miss the last week of school before GCSEs to make a point. Although I agree they are being ridiculous making an issue of it now.

CarpeVinum Thu 16-May-13 12:25:27

How many inches above the top of her knee is it ?

We used to roll ours up at the waistband. and I was a quiet studious girl before my o levels too.

I think given the stakes I'd grab a pair of cheap trews pronto, get her back in and then go and have a chat to see what the issue was. It may be a storm in a teacup, it may be there were additional details you weren't aware of.

Thingummy she should be preparing for exams, not psyching up for a uniform battle every day. She doesn't need any more stress, surely?

Blu Thu 16-May-13 12:27:54

They are being ridiculous, but this is not the moment to make your dd the fulcrum of a stand off between you and the school.

Maybe her skirt has really been too short all these weeks and she has had the benefit of not being pulled p on it earlier.

Be calm, call the Head of year or whoever and suggest in a reasonable way that she wear her skirt until study leave starts.

Has she been turning the top over once she leaves the house or something?

Hamwidge Thu 16-May-13 12:27:57

Yanbu. For the sake of 6 days I would argue the toss. Send in a note saying you will replace the skirt when you get paid at the end of the month. By which point she will have left.

SavoyCabbage Thu 16-May-13 12:28:04

Undo the hem and make it a bit longer. It's ridiculous to expect you to buy uniform now!

Alibabaandthe40nappies Thu 16-May-13 12:29:07

Now is not the time to have a battle IMO, she just needs to focus.

Go in and find out what has happened by all means, but if the easiest road is buying a pair of trousers then just do it. How much will they be, £20-£25? That is cheap for a set of decent GCSE results, surely?

Just get her a longer skirt or some trousers. If she's grown over the last few weeks then maybe it's shorter now than it was then. Or she rolls it up. Given the ridiculous short skirts and really tight trousers I see, a school trying to keep a lid on it isn't a bad thing. Don't make a fuss it's not what she needs right now. Yanbu to think this late it's a bit pointless but a rule is a rule I guess and if one person flouts it then it spirals.

NotYoMomma Thu 16-May-13 12:31:53

£20 - £25 for school trousers?!?!

You are either on crack or very rich lol

helenthemadex Thu 16-May-13 12:34:09

I would do what Hamwidge said its the most sensible solution

£20-£25 may not be much to some people but to me others its not that easy to find especially for 6 days!

Moomoomie Thu 16-May-13 12:37:23

Go to your nearest sainsburys or tesco and pick up a skirt. Less than a tenner. Job done.
Give it to charity once she leves school.... Or let her burn it grin

RooneyMara Thu 16-May-13 12:39:32

what is 'whit' please?

ThingummyBob Thu 16-May-13 12:39:56

Iheart I do agree with you. That's why I said only if the dd was happy to go in.

I think if they send her home/pull her from class again I'd be inclined to buy trousers, but really, wtf are the school playing at.

I'd call the HT first still though - and ask for that explanation. Any reasonable person would surely back down at that stage...

jacks365 Thu 16-May-13 12:40:56

You should be able to find trousers for about £5. Speak to the school to see if you can sort it out as it might not be as it appears, maybe one teacher talking out of line rather than the heads decision so they may be ok with it.

To those saying stand your ground please note that if the skirt does breech uniform rules the school is entitled to send her home and not sit exams, they'd be stupid to do so but have the right.

ThingummyBob Thu 16-May-13 12:41:00

This coming half term holiday is sometimes known as whit Rooney.

lucjam Thu 16-May-13 12:43:29

Can't she just wear some leggings underneath for the last few days at school?

tiggytape Thu 16-May-13 12:43:58

If they are doing leavers' assemblies, prize giving or other similar things before study leave, they often insist on full and correct uniform and won't let the Year 11's attend otherwise.

Does she not have a longer skirt or trousers to wear. It seems a shame to miss her last few days.

NeverBeenToMe Thu 16-May-13 12:46:07

I have phoned Head of Year who will ring me back when she has looked into the matter.

It's above the knee admittedly and if she had been told earlier in the year I would have been happy to replace it.

It is the timing of it that I am finding difficult to comprehend. Apparently form tutors are supposed to check uniform daily! I think I will do the "when I get paid" line smile There is no way I would buy a pair of trousers for six days' wear. Unless a pair of black linen ones that she would wear again would do ...... smile

Unpick the hem and gain an inch?

NeverBeenToMe Thu 16-May-13 12:48:17

Off at a tangent - is it not called Whit(sun) anymore?

meditrina Thu 16-May-13 12:48:19

"If she's grown over the last few weeks" - unlikely in year 11.

But is there any chance you've still got her old skirt shoved in a cupboard somewhere?

If not, I'd go for the "I will replace after my next pay check" approach, or let down the hem (or see if waistband can be adjusted so it sits a bit lower) and hope for the best.

And yes, they are very silly to be doing this with year 11 leavers with only 6 days to go. Better approach, if they need a crack down, would be to target all the year groups continuing in the school. And to give them all the dire warnings next week, telling them to be properly dressed after half term or else.

TigerSwallowTail Thu 16-May-13 12:48:54

Get her to stick some thick tights or a pair of leggings on underneath her skirt.

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