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AIBU?

about wanting to get DS a toy pushchair?

76 replies

ShadowStorm · 07/05/2013 19:13

DS is 21 months, and I'm currently pregnant with DC2.

I've been thinking about getting DS a toy pushchair and doll so that he can play at looking after a baby - sort of practice for being a big brother, IYSWIM. DS also likes playing with pushchairs at playgroups and round friend's houses.

I mentioned this pushchair buying plan to DH, and he looked a bit Hmm and said that he thought I shouldn't do this as we don't have room for a toy pushchair (Not strictly true, as we can easily make room for one if we wanted to).
Anyway, I said, well, I'll just get him a doll for now then, and we can get a toy pushchair later.

Turns out DH's real objection wasn't about space. He thinks that DS shouldn't get a doll and pushchair because it would be freaky for DS to play with such a girly toy and pretend to look after a baby. I pointed out that DH himself looks after DS - including when DS was a baby - so DS would be copying his daddy as much as he'd be copying me - but somehow this is different because DS is a real child.

I still think that there'd be nothing wrong with buying DS a pushchair and doll to play with. AIBU?

OP posts:
everlong · 07/05/2013 19:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KatamariDamacy · 07/05/2013 19:15

YANBU.

DH is BU.

HTH.

CommanderShepard · 07/05/2013 19:16

YANBU.

I worked in a creche as a teenager and all the little boys of your son's age loved to play in the home corner with the dollies at some point during their visit. It's normal!

CailinDana · 07/05/2013 19:16

Yanbu of course

JamieandtheMagicTorch · 07/05/2013 19:17

DS1 had one. Ignored the doll (and a toy bath I bought) but loved pushing his brio trains around in the pushchair (he loved those trains like babies)

One mother at DSs playgroup said "aren't they for girls?", but I ignored her.

Get one, but don't assume it will ensure DS1 will want to look after the baby......

dizzy77 · 07/05/2013 19:18

Hello! I'm grappling with the same. DH won't ask his sister (who has a 5yo Dd) if she'll pass on any dolls, DS will soon be 2 and will soon have a brother or sister.

That said, I keep looking at the dollies when I'm out and can't get past the wall of pink. I know I need to do that (and I'm not worried about it being a "boy doll for a boy" as some have suggested), I'm hoping is have the same mental blockage against the pink if I was buying for a girl.

BendyBusBuggy · 07/05/2013 19:19

YANBU

My DS had a fold up one, something like this www.elc.co.uk/Cup-Cake-My-First-Stroller---Blue/125130,default,pd.html
When dc2 was old enough they pushed each other around in it for hours. One of the best toys they have had!

foreverondiet · 07/05/2013 19:20

Been done before. Buy the pushchair and doll. Not expensive. But I found whereas DD still played with the doll cradle and pushchair at age 8, DS1 had grown out if it by around age 5. All children are different regardless gender but have noticed similar with their friends.

PrettyKitty1986 · 07/05/2013 19:20

My ds's both had dolls and pushchairs, they'd always make a beeline for the one's in play group so I got them their own.
Df did grumble (good humouredly) about 'boys with dolls' but wouldn't have had any real objections to it.

BendyBusBuggy · 07/05/2013 19:21

You could always get buggy and teddy instead of doll if the doll is the bone of contention

ouryve · 07/05/2013 19:22

DS1 used to have one that he used to push TinkyWinky around in. Having a penis doesn't make it impossible to push a pushchair :o

ChangeNameToday · 07/05/2013 19:24

DS had a little pink pushchair, he used to push his cars around in it. Was cute...

Exhaustipated · 07/05/2013 19:25

YANBU, obvs.

DS went through a phase of being obsessed with his buggy and doll when he was about that age. He's not so keen now (at 3.5) but it was very sweet at the time.

We got a great, simple, gender neutral red one from John Lewis for a tenner.

JakeBullet · 07/05/2013 19:26

YANBU, little boys see plenty of men pushing prams these days.

DS had a pink one which my sister gave him...I think it was the fact it had wheels which attracted him.Grin

CruCru · 07/05/2013 19:26

We have one (although it is blue) and a boy baby doll.

StrangeGlue · 07/05/2013 19:27

I know little boys with pushchairs and they love them. I think it's a fab idea - gets him involved!

SirBoobAlot · 07/05/2013 19:28

Your H is being a knob :) Does he never push the buggy, then?

ladydepp · 07/05/2013 19:32

My DH was funny about it too, which was weird as he is a completely hands on Dad. We bought the stuff anyway (pushchairs for our twins boys in our case), and we now have a laugh about it whenever we see a little boy with a pushchair.

He eventually relaxed about the pink feather boa and the Bob the Builder outfit too (on his son, not him Wink)

Springforward · 07/05/2013 19:34

DS had a pushchair and baby doll aged about 2, both in blue, given to us by a friend who noticed that he really liked her little girl's one, bless her. He loved it, DH was fine about it too (interestingly the doll was a playmate rather than fed/ changed etc).

However FIL's face was a picture when he saw it, but he knew better than to comment in my presence Grin

Yodeleeiay · 07/05/2013 19:34

No! Get them, pushchair is a great present for any toddler, it makes them walk forwards in a straight line and not deviate off to climb steps, go in opposite direction etc.

Don't see dolls for boys as a problem at all. My friend who's a doctor got her 1yo ds one to encourage him to be a doctor too... My ds2 plays with his doll on and off and loves the (pink flowery) pushchair he 'gave' dd1 when he was born.

MortifiedAdams · 07/05/2013 19:37

Your DH is being a tool. DD has a kiddies umbrella fold stroller thingy with a doll, and whether Id had a biy or girl, we would have got one. She pushes Woody (toy story) round in it.

Just buy it, cant see why it even needs a discussion.

pesta · 07/05/2013 19:37

YANBU I bought my ds a £2.50 pink gingham folddown pushchair at last august two months before I had ds2. Seriously best money I've spent on him ! He still pushes it around with teddies in. And there have been loads of fights between his friends when they visit, all the boys want a go ! Lots of other friends have bought their ds's ones since, they just didn't have the confidence to do so until they saw boys enjoying nurturing, copying what their dads do. Think people worry too much about gender toys, children just want to play.

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MortifiedAdams · 07/05/2013 19:39

Not that I think you need to buy a blue one, but what about this?

SkiBumMum · 07/05/2013 19:40

Let Toys Be Toys For Girls and Boys.

Tell your husband to oogle this campaign which is making headline news with its sterling awareness raising work.

Stupid attitudes like his start with no dolls for male toddlers and soon end up as no science/history etc for pre-school girls just putrid pink plastic make up sets.

Just make him think about it will you?!

fuzzpig · 07/05/2013 19:40

Of course YANBU, DS loved his and we often took it out with us with a teddy in it (and usually a toy car/train! I think that's why it broke eventually due to heavy outdoor use. I know he plays with them at nursery though. :)

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